Yo yo yo!
You�re forgetting John Cena. You got rocks in your brain?
You�re gold was out in �96. You need t o sport a gold chain
Now, you and Brock are �close friends� and Big Show, he needs a bra
That�s not a triple threat match Kurt, that�s a m�nage a trois
And by the time you all wrestle, there will be an empty arena
The main event at Vengeance is Undertaker-Cena
You�re not better than me Kurt, you�re not even my equal
I'm like terminator 3, you�re like a Legally Blonde -sequel
It makes me sick when you come out here and run your little mouth
We in the great white north but you can bite my great white south
(Courtesy of Derek Burgan over at PWTorch.com)
Angle gave Cena "mad props" and then tried a little rap of his own. Angle had referee Brian Hebner step in the ring and give him a beat as Angle busted out a little rhyme, complete with a dance. The crowd was fully behind Angle. Cena shot back and said it was obvious Kurt never majored in Thuganomics. Angle gave Cena a hug and then said Cena must've never majored in Huganomics. Angle threatened to make Cena tap but Big Show came out which gave Cena a chance to attack Angle and hit the FU. Show stepped into the ring and towered over his opponent at Vengeance.
Billy Kidman & Rey Mysterio defeated The Basham Brothers (with Shaniqua), Johnny Stamboli & Chuck Palumbo, and the APA in a Fatal Four Way. Midway through the match, the APA and the FBI brawled on the outside and fought all the way to the back and apparently got counted out. Kidman looked good in his return but Mysterio stole the show and finished with a 619 followed by the springboard legdrop, (dubbed Dropping the Dime) for the win.
After the break, Angle was getting some ice put on his back when Brock Lesnar walked in to check up on him. Lesnar had a funny line about putting some ice on Angle's head because it was swelling as well.
After that, we were shown all of last weeek's main event in which Zach Gowen won himself a contract with a little help from Lesnar and Angle.
In the arena, Stephanie McMahon hit the ring and called out Zach Gowen for his contract siging. Before putting his name on the dotted line, Gowen made a speech about his dreams finally coming true and all that jazz. As soon as he signed, Vince McMahon and Sable walked out and Vince said now that Gowen was an official WWE employee, he had to listen to the higher power. Vince then booked himself in a match against Gowen at the PPV. Shortly after that, Sable blindsided Stephanie with a clipboard and then walked to the back with Vince.
After the break, Vince and Sable celebrated their little Stephanie debacle with a kiss but before it went any further, Stephanie came charging into the office and speared Sable and the two went into a couch, flipping it over. Steph squealed like a banshee as her and Sable tangled. Eventually, the two were seperated as Vince booked another Vengeance match, Sable vs. Steph.
Rhyno & Chris Benoit defeated Matt Hardy & Shannon Moore. Good performances all around. Benoit hit the swandive headbutt on Moore, only to turn around into a Twist of Fate from Hardy. In the end, Benoit was laid out as was Moore who slowly crawled over and went for a pin but Benoit snapped on a Crossface and got the win.
Backstage, Angle was giving Lesnar some shit about him having to take on three guys in the main event. Lesnar asked Angle where'd he be and Angle said he'd have his back.
Eddie Guerrero rolled out to the ring next and mentioned last week's incident with Tajiri. Guerrero said his temper sometimes gets out of control and he wished Tajiri a speedy recovery. Guerrreo then said it was time to look out for numero uno, himself.
Eddie Guerreo defeated Ultimo Dragon in a first round United States Championship Tournament match. Excellent but much too quick of a match between these two. Dragon shouldn't be giving the higher-ups any second guesses as he continued to impress. Funny spot with Eddie almost getting tossed into his lowrider but stoping himself just short. Guerrero countered with a quick rollup and held the tights for the win.
Backstage, Billy Gunn was getting it on a little with Torrie Wilson. Oh, sweet, now all I have to do is start going bald and obsess about my ass and she'll be all mine! Bwahahaha! Anyway, they headed out to the ring for their match as Dave Hebner (or Earl, maybe, I dunno) passed by, almost catching them in the act! God, no! Torrie giggled and uh, that was that.
Billy Gunn & Torrie Wilson defeated Jamie Noble & Nidia. Guys vs. guys, girls vs. girls, standard intergender match. Gunn took out Noble who tagged in Nidia who then tried to go after Gunn but didn't get far. Torrie was tagged in and hit a DDT shortly after for the win. After the match, Noble made an indecent proposal to Wilson, offering her ten grand if she'd spend the night with him. Robert Redford he ain't. Gunn blindsided him and then Torrie hit another DDT. Somewhere in there Nidia got pantsed.
Backstage, some dude told Angle that Vince wanted to see him before he was about to go be in Brock's corner for the main event.
Big Show, Shelton Benjamin & Charlie Haas defeated Brock Lesnar in a 3-on-1 handicap match. Benjamin and Haas came out and informed Tony Chimmel that they would now like to be known as the World's Greatest Tag Team. Inventive... Lesnar dominated early on and worked mostly with Benjamin. Late in the match, after Lesnar had been worn down he rebounded and the match went to the outside. Oh yeah, this was a falls count anywhere match as well. Lesnar tried to hit the F5 on Benjamin out on the ramp but Show put a stop to that. Lesnar held his own and took care of the World's Greatest Tag Team and then took the ring steps and set them up in front of the announcers table. Lesnar grabbed Big Show and went up on the steps and looked for an F5 but Show countered and hit Lesnar with the best chokeslam I've ever seen. It was huge. Show sent Lesnar through the table and then made the pin. SmackDown! went off the air with Show heading up the ramp and promising he'd walk out of Vengeance as champion. At least that's what I think he meant by repeatedly doing the belt around the waist motion. Good show
Credit: Dustin Tingue of LordsOfPain.net