“In the woods, we return to reason and faith. There I feel nothing can befall me in life-no disgrace, no calamity, (leaving me my eyes,) which nature cannot repair. Standing on the bare ground- my head bathed by the blithe air, and uplifted into infinite space- all mean egotism vanishes. I become a transparent eyeball. I am nothing. I see all.”

                The girl in the back of the class bowed her head. The words in front of her blurred and separated as she fought a deep relaxation that was slowly creeping over her. She mustn’t fall asleep. Not again. The teacher would make such a fuss at her. It would destroy the precious invisibility that she kept neatly sealed around herself. The girl shook herself and tried to find were the class was reading from.

                There was silence. The girl looked up to see what had happened, only to find the class turned, facing her, staring at her. She blanched away from their eyes and looked past them. The teacher spoke suddenly and loudly, shattering the shell the girl had drawn around herself. Her face reddened and her hands began to tremble. Where was the protective casualness, the laws of nature that kept her invisible and away from the attention of everyone else? The teacher asked the question again, an undertone of annoyance in her voice. It was high and her pronunciation terse and tense. The girl opened her mouth but nothing came from it. Her voice had evaporated long ago.

                Events like these chewed holes through her. They always would, the girl reflected morosely. She tried to think of other things, but the events of the day still clung to her heart and pulled it down into misery and anxiety. In her mind she knew that tomorrow was another day, but she could help but feel the sting and torment of the present.

                “I am a coward, aren’t I?” the girl asked herself once she was alone and far away from any other human. She walked home through dark streets and chilly cold. Her quiet voice had not the magnitude to echo, but she liked to believe it did.

                “Why am I like this?” she asked herself. “What makes me so different?” she sighed. Or was she different? Was she just some stupid girl in school who couldn’t keep awake? She had always tried to maintain the illusion to herself that she was special, or different. It kept her from feeling so stupid, and alone.

                “Not that I don’t like being alone.” She said to herself. It was true.  In fact, it was the pitying glances that the higher children gave her that she feared and hated the most. Why couldn’t they just forget her and go on with their small lives?

                “Don’t be an idiot. Criticizing others gets you no where.” She told herself, stopping her thoughts from wandering down such a path. She was happy, though sometimes she wished for someone who she could show her innermost self. Although, she wasn’t quiet sure what her innermost self was. But one thing was for sure. Reality was becoming a heavier burden. Family, school, the future… they all blurred together into reality that pulled her down into its mire. The girl wanted to forget such troubles… even for just a little while. She wanted a few hours that she wouldn’t have to think of anything tiresome. Freedom. Yes. That’s what freedom was. 

                She could hear the whimsical notes of this freedom calling to her. She stopped and blinked. It wasn’t just in her mind. She turned and looked into the expansion of trees on her left. Yes. Someone was playing music in the woods. She continued walking. This music had nothing to do with her. In fact, she became a bit fearful of an encounter with another human. But this music climbed in the cold air, and sang so sweetly, the girl felt it through her spine. She shivered and stopped, watching the boughs of the trees that swayed mockingly back at her. Now it seemed to her that this music had everything to do with her. It was an enchantment, aimed directly toward her.

                “This is my imagination.” She tried whispering to herself. But nothing came out. She was afraid to interrupt the beauty. It called her forth. The girl felt it strongly now. The music latched into her soul and tugged her toward its origin.  Her eyes softened as though she were about to sleep. Her books dropped to the ground, but she did not hear them. The music had transfixed her and she knew only its sound. She was suddenly in the woods walking. She knew no direction, and had no bearings but everything came naturally, as though she had traveled these woods a hundred times. She felt like laughing, as she finally understood something that had been bothering her in the back of her mind.

                “Of course I couldn’t understand it then.” She laughed to herself, “How could I understand what Emerson’s quote meant in that stuffy classroom? You can’t understand anything in there.” She felt it now. She knew what it was to be the ‘transparent eyeball’… to be nothing… yet to see all. To feel all. The invisible tides of the forest wrought their way through her soul as the music lead her deeper into her divine trance. 

                But she was no longer alone. Her heart froze in terror as she realized that another stood in the clearing. She wanted to bolt away as a deer does when confronted. But she was too deeply under the spell of the music, and it did not want her to leave. It drew her closer to the individual. She lifted her head and tried to study the person, but there was not much to see. He was clothed in flowing robes that cover most of his body and head. Short stands of golden hair shone under the hood. He was tall, and he held a small flute to his mouth and played it gingerly, creating the music that had called her there.

                Finally he lowered the instrument and the sweet notes died away in a solemn echo. He lifted his eyes and met hers. The tawny flecks of gold sparkled into her, piecing her soul, shining with an eerie light. The girl trembled.

                She had always shied away from encounters with other people, but this man’s presence felt completely different. It was like she was alone with herself, yet at the same time he overwhelmed everything within her and held her attention with a causal firmness.

                “Tell me child, what brings you here?” he asked. The girl paused trying to find a bit of courage.

                “Your music sir.” She whispered.

                “Why has it brought you here? Do you know?” he asked softly still holding her gaze.

                “No sir.” She said. They stood in absolute silence for a moment, before the turned away and called to her,

                “Follow me, please.” Obediently the girl walked followed. The girl followed along, her shoes crunching the nettles beneath them, no matter how quietly she tried to walk. The man in front of her made no sound.

His unearthliness seemed to affect the forest around them. The branches filtered the sunbeams down to the floor and made strange blotchy patters on the brown nettles that lay strewn about. Everything was silent aside from her own footsteps. Finally they came to a small clearing with a stump in the middle. It was an old stump, with soft green moss growing from its bark. The man leaned against it and turned around to face the girl again. She stopped a few feet from him.

                “I have called you here because you dream.” He said. “You have many hidden things in your soul. In fact, it seems as though your entire soul is hidden from you. These things, they give you the ability to separate yourself from reality. Just as you are now.” He stopped and looked up, “Logically you know the world is still spinning, people are still going about their lives, but for you, time stands still and you have the ability to believe this.” He smiled, “But I don’t need to tell you these things. You know them already, though you may think them to be foolish qualities.” The girl stood riveted in fear wondering how this man could peer into her with such ease. She tried to raise anxiety within her, but found that it would not come. Again she was disturbed but couldn’t think too much about it, for he was going on.

                “Child, what do you think would happen if the people from your world found this instrument?” he asked holding up his strange flute. The girl blinked in surprise, her mind racing.

                “I-I don’t know.” She stuttered. His eyes pierced into her again.

                “You do.” He said. She felt frozen in terror, but unlike her teachers, this man made no annoyed sounds, he did not glare at her, nor did he did not mock her. He just waited. The girl felt her mind working and found the solution.

                “T-They would want to study it. Understand it. Then, p-put it on display so others could see how it worked…” her face burned at the thought. It almost seemed blasphemous what she was suggesting. But the man did not become angry. He just watched her closely and then nodded.

                “Yes. That is true.” He said, his voice becoming hard. “The humans of this world want to control all they do not understand and once they begin to master something they exploit it and do everything possible to bend it to their will. The unknown is to be feared, and the discovered is to be conquered. That is their nature.”

                “I- I’m sorry.” The girl choked, frightened that he would become angry now. He looked back at her, and his eyes softened.

                “What do have to be sorry about? You have come here because you value the music in a different way. You have no desire to make it your own, yet you still loved it and hungered toward it.” He stopped as he noticed the girl turning red. Her face burned not with his praise, but with her own shame. His smiled faded as he felt it.

                “You not as low a being as you conceive yourself child.” He said softly. The girl said nothing but shook her head.

                “Why did you bring me here?” she asked, her voice low and dejected.

 

 

                “I have a favor to ask you.” He said,  “I want you to understand first, that this place which you call home, is not the only world out there.” The girl nodded. It seemed perfectly logical in his presence. “These other worlds have conflicts and peace, just as your world does. But it seems that people from your world have broken the laws of the universe. Some of them have found ways into other worlds. Into my world namely.”

                “People form my world?” the girl asked in confusion. He nodded.

                “It happened a very long time ago, and its nothing you would have heard about. They were assumed dead here in your world when they left and never returned.” He sighed a long tired sigh. “They have lived in my world for many generations and now they have… overstepped their boundaries and seek to make all the world theirs.”

                “Why are you telling me this?” the girl asked, despite her fear of speaking out.

                “I want to ask you to go there and deliver a message. It could make all the difference to that world.” He looked away in something that resembled shame. “I have not the power to contact anyone from that world anymore. That is why I have crossed the threads of the universe to this world. To ask someone here.” He paused and said, “You.” Fear suddenly welled up in the girl.

                “I-I can’t go anywhere.” She said. “I can’t… I can’t help you.” He turned to her silently. Trembling she brought her face up to meet his. He was not angry, or even disappointed. His eyes looked at her sadly and that was all.

                “If that’s what you choose.” He said. The girl stepped back and looked down at the ground shamefully. At that moment she felt her soul shiver and released its hold on reality completely. Her eyes were filled with the details of the world and a strange courage began to well up with in her breast.

                “I can’t.” she said. “I can’t say no. This has nothing to do with me, that’s what I thought. And then a thousand other reasons…But…” she looked his full in the face in a burst of inspiration. “Please. Take me.” She said. He smiled gratefully and raised his right hand.

                “When you arrive, seek out a warrior named Fariean of Betamy. When you meet him, you will know what to say.” He spread his fingers delicately as if in a wave. “Farewell my Wanderer. We will meet again shortly.” The girl’s vision blurred and swayed into a black peaceful ocean that enveloped her completely and washed her out of her world.