| 2004: |
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| rantings archinve |
| topic : date night |
| date : jan 24, 04 |
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| was awakened this morning at 6 a.m. when my door suddenly slamed shut. i hate being woken up that way, i literally jolted foward so violently that i almost knocked my forehead on my knees. it was *k (my suitemate). *k has been seeing this guy, some 18 year old freshman boy who thinks of nothing but her breasts and how he can convince her to let him touch them. she was crying and tired, having stayed out all night with him. i tried to comfort her, we had a roommate-bonding moment (very judy blume-ish) and then she and i both went back to bed. when i woke up this afternoon (hehe) i thought some more about k's predicament. i had asked *k, if this guy is so mean toyou and causes you so much pain, why stay with him? and you know what she said... because, he calls me, and i want to have plans on date night. when did it become so important to have a date for date night? sometimes it seems we're more willing to spend date night with someone who is making our life miserable than to spend it doing things that make us happy, like curling up in front of a tv, or hanging around your friends. come on, ladies! now, i know *k doesn't really like this boy. *k knows this too. but she would rather be with him than be with no one. sad, huh? i guess its hard to remember, at moments of single lonliness, that it is better to be without a date on date night than to be with someone who is hurting you, or with someone with whom things are only mediocre. i remember those moments of feeling far more alone with another when things did not mesh than i have ever felt by myself. but, at the same time, i also remember those moments of lonliness that have made me willing to sit through uncomfortable date after another just to avoid having to be reminded of how much i missed being apart of a couple. i remember days when i have missed more than anything else, curling up with someone. missed those inside jokes that couples have. missed being pleasantly surprised by a love. days where i have missed hugging. its those days that makes us susceptible to those dreary, never-ending dates on date night... *k misses those things, though she wont admit it. i think thats why she's with this boy---she'd rather go through the frustration of being with him, than the lonliness of being without him. i'm not going to say i really blame her, we've all been there, haven't we? when we're alone, we all crave the company of someone... even if its not the someone in our dreams...sad thing is, i've been there, recognize it, and will probably be there back some day, dating the mediocre on date night simply because he called and i had no plans... and because its him or nothing. |