| Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman "In a very real sense we have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels." (page 8) "�emotional life is richer for those who notice more." (page 50) "It is not that alexithymics never feel, but that they are unable to know � and especially unable to put it into words � precisely what their feelings are." (page 51) "�ventilating anger is one of the worst ways to cool down: outbursts of rage typically pump up the emotional brain�s arousal, leaving people more angry, not less� Far more effective was when people first cooled down, and then, in a more constructive or assertive manner, confronted the person to settle their dispute." (page 65) "Bereavement is useful; full-blown depression is not." (page 70) "Good moods, while they last, enhance the ability to think flexibly and with more complexity, thus making it easier to find solutions to problems, whether intellectual or interpersonal." (page 85) "Paradoxically, people in flow exhibit a masterly control of what they are doing, their responses perfectly attuned to the changing demands of the task. And although people perform at their peak while in flow, they are unconcerned with how they are doing, with thoughts of success or failure � the sheer pleasure of the act itself is what motivates them." (page 91) "Just as the mode of the rational mind is words, the mode of the emotions is nonverbal." (page 97) "In short, whether people feel upbeat or down, the more physically attuned their encounter, the more similar their moods will become." (page 116) "Dominant partners talk more, while the subordinate partner watches the other�s face more � a setup for the transmission of affect." (page 117) "At age ten, roughly the same percent of girls as boys are overtly aggressive, given to open confrontation when angered. But by age thirteen, a telling difference between the sexes emerges: girls become more adept than boys at artful aggressive tactics like ostracism, vicious gossip, and indirect vendettas. Boys, by and large, simply continue being confrontational when angered, oblivious to these more covert strategies." (page 131) "The power of the stereotypes that buttress prejudice comes in part from a more neutral dynamic in the mind that makes stereotypes of all kinds self-confirming." (page 157) "Simple neglect, studies find, can be more damaging than outright abuse." (page 195) "To be sure, the brain remains plastic throughout life, though not to the spectacular extent seen in children." (page 227) "Worldwide, generations that came of age during politically troubled times had higher rates of depression, though the overall upward trend holds apart from any political events." (page 241) |