Extrem Dark

Extrem Dark ~~Extrem Dark~~
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A Blood Red Sky An Empty Hole... Anti-Hope Beyond Sight Bittersweet Savior Darkened Cigarettes Dead Laurels I Dead Laurels II "Depth" Devil's Advocate Empathy (A Suicides Handbook) Fallen Final Relief Germs Gothic Suicide Doll Illusive Sanity Killing Me Liberation Life Force... Living Dead Malfunction Metal Purgatory My Mind My World Not A Punishment Poem: Killing Angel Red Regretted Daughter Reject The Skin Suffering The Burning Of My Flesh The On Comming Madness Tender Hopelessness True Moments Of Terror Twisted Life ©
Back Up Tender Hopelessness Tender Hopelessness Warmth, tenderness, intimate and pleased Happiness warping, mutated, diseased� Angelic petals, shriveled in seed Wilting as contentment, sacrificial deed� Dead eyes stare To the skies distinction Even the clouds Offer contradiction� What use is panic Instinct uncontrolled Evolution suspended Extinct, through extolled. Empty� deluded state� Peace within sinks� pining escape� Addiction suppressant Futility wrenching Remnants chastised� Fortunes hope Vague, generalized Hopelessness� As comforts disguised. © Back Up Malfunction Needle injections of gasoline Veins always ripping With a heart full of kerosene Hollowing out Hollow inside Emotional evacuation My skin is on fire Reaction to chemical irritation Psychological quarantine Control through injections of gasoline Emotional termination Personal situations System malfunctions Sparks, synapses Mathematical functions Praying to a myth While invisible gods stand real Sitting in your flesh Swimming in your blood Now in control of the time to live They alone Hand on the button To a system malfunction © Back UpDead Laurels I The remaining realms of innocence within me died unwillingly the day my acid scars burned out your eyes your image withered right in front of me all the memories of our laughter together sicken me your naivety is as fathomless as the ocean of lies you cosily wrap yourself in seconds still tick by an unconscious agenda is unfolding before me I know I must purge my past but to throw up the sickness of our yesterdays together would leave me blank pathetical hypocritical to the extremity of frozen rigidity even the cancer in my mind resulting from your toxins is better than a lobotomy © Back UpDead Laurels II Watching Scenes from a memory your face Bleeds out conformity my mental scars you'll never see your essence was held in naivety your drug-addled brain was cut with a redilin addiction your body is whored by mainstream lies lost in truths I cannot disguise anymore than you can your abnormalities vacancies complicated complacency Meandering Moronic Moments are in the scrapbook of my mind I cannot find a reason to leave you only knowing an intense burning for a past that's not valid anymore talking with you... never used to be a chore apathy for once isn't at the core of my nerve impulses I am inhibited at the very thought of you © Back Up Fallen First stages of life Spent encompassed in light As of yet, were not ready For perfection, we fight Struggle and strain As we kick and we scream We battle our lineage Torn apart at the seams In an act of disdain We are cast from the heavens No preparation, no warning Told be wary of the seven Tendrils from below Riddled with thorns Pull us to the dark From which were told we were born Soak up all the lies And regard them with silence But when faced with the truth We accept it with violence Succumb to be human What we're destined to be Flawed in this world Fallen angels are we... © Back UpRegretted Daughter Regret living, regret life There I hold a kitchen knife Tears of hate dissolve my face And I'll lose life's long race By winning first, first to die Death awards those that cry Suicide, grasp the knife Hands are shaking, take my life Mutilation, the cuts are deep Wounds still bleeding in my sleep Tell me I'm wrong in my mind Shattered bones I hear you grind Tell me that I'll be alright Even if I die tonight I'm just a bag of walking dead skin Suffering cripple, yes, you win Stab through the fear I sweated See the child you regretted Taste my blood that's cold and sour Feel my soul that you devoured Stabbing deeper, twist the knife Organs tearing, bleeding life Every drop, one drop less Fingers slipping, bloody mess Tell me that my mind was free And this isn't how its supposed to be Tell me that I wasn't weak Even when the blood has leaked Tell me I had beauty within And that I never felt your sin Tell me the truth, the opposite Tell me you were there and never quit Its getting dark now and very cold I'm sorry I failed, but still you scold Stabbing over and over again I can see where the light begins Tell me that I'm going to a better place Where all my memories will be erased The knife has dropped out of my hands Off to live another Dreamland The pain has stopped and eyes rolled back No more light, just freezing black I'm sorry I never said good-bye I'm sorry but this is where I lie My body bleeding on the floor Here's the daughter you wanted more © Back Up Anti-Hope Nothing tastes as bitter as crocodile tears Excreted from eyes of a glass - cold automaton The feelings of rejection, born too familiar A sand grain wouldn't blow in a pit this deep Could an empty heart have any tears to reap Nothings ever right - dead roots unsown Only to be torn from Eden through negative notes Unfounded weight compress my shoulders unseen As a lump in my throat stabs in to choke Pressure of an empty nothing lies stiff under ice Untold burns from the liquid nitrogen (getting colder) Cutaway, float apart in glacial spears No; there's nothing AT ALL like crocodile tears A fucking stupid, pathetic flaw in THAT plot How can you fake the emotions you haven't fucking got? This emotionless particle of razoring fear Unassociated and devoid in soul Fake emotions can weep to an ears disbelief The loss isn't that bad - it's the reasonless doubt, That will break the bones of hope As they puncture lungs of redemption All fiery opportunities smoke May positivity clamor as ivy climbing fast -To it's own destruction For to burn like Hells own cast I wish nothing more for you - An empty shell Devoid in it's invocation of tears raining down ...cold...numb. This loss, is gain I'm happy, in pain I am free, yet trapped In solitude, again... © Back UpDevil's Advocate Degeneration. Mental masturbation. Idle games we subject ourselves to. Depression is common ground. Pop some pills and escape. Blurring the reality. Escapism. There's no exit. The key to the exit door is A knife. Crimson streaks run Trailing to the fingertips. Trickling out gradually Like the life in us Fading. Fading until There's nothing. Nothingness is the only Emotion in us. Filled on by booze. Joy comes with a price Coming in a form of A little pill. Don't say love is the cure. Because we know love as SEX. Addicted. Hooked onto it Like we are on glue. Wasted. Spent. Busted. But who cares? No one gives a shit. Our souls are all sold to the devil. But aren't we the Fallen angels? The Devil, himself? © Back UpDarkened Cigarettes Alone, in front of the expanse of black, Light from the side but faith no more, A moment to ponder before I crack, And I reach for the pain without a sore. It eludes me, that devious and sly thought, Leaving the notion of immense disease, A smile - receiving the item that I sought, But it's a lie - I'm brought to my knees. One, the sender, blinks and turns away, Finding solace in personal deceptions, Letting this helpless being cry and stray, Upon the brink of futile conceptions. Once - just maybe - there had been the rose, Impish grins shining to respond in aluminum, But the heart - it feels what the mind knows, Sensing pain in edifices and a small crumb. Falling, now, with no signs of stopping known, Occasional hints with the facade of light to see, Snapping and breaking every single bone, Yet one would see an untouched body. Light - the purifying source of all knowledge and lies, Those Mundane objects re-attaching mortal debts, Here - no, perhaps there, light returns and deeply sighs, Streaming the curling smoke of darkened cigarettes. © Back Up A Blood Red Sky As I show my power, the sky is red Passing over my enemies is a sense of dread My body surges with the powers of the night Soon I will begin this frenzied fight I will stand alone and slay my foes With each passing battle my power grows They are fools for they do not give in They will feel the strength I contain within When they look into my eyes They know that they are soon to die I brandish my sword and hold it low Then I begin to faintly glow The glow becomes stronger as does my rage Which is no longer held within a cage I strike swiftly and without remorse Then I continue on this bloody course Soon there are none that can challenge me As I near my peak and become free Free from the boundaries of a mortal life Free to soar the skies in flight As I listen to the thoughts of the mortal minds I smile as I gaze upon A Blood Red Sky © Back Up Beyond Sight The first sound of black a silver blade swims puntures these eyes blinding I, reciever shrieks of pain a gush of copper trails the first sound of black adrift in ashy slush a ragged hollow doll she blindly stares and sees a parchment floating free painted in indigos lacerated at each corner the dead doll gazes at the portrait of a blank the third sound of black latched in symbols a mind and body torn apart and screaming endless nonsensical phrases and then the blare of silence the fourth sound of black an unknown place stiched together with dreams nothing that has taken form I am the doll and I have seen the truth I will fear no longer © Back Up Bittersweet Savior Bittersweet savior. I look down at my gentle dagger, it looks up and shines at me. It is bittersweet savior, the door that sets me free. I never needed anger. I never asked for hate. I disbeleive in destiny. I despise all thoughts of 'fate'. I love my bittersweet savior, my angel through days of late. It doesn't care if I'm black or white, or gay, or bi, or straight. It is my bittersweet savior, my angel through days of late. But what if I killed myself now? in this all-depresive state. That is what I would always be- dead on a concrete slate. I will laugh at my own destiny, I will defy my very own fate. For god and the devil are nothing, and humanity is that which is great. © Back Up Darkness Why must I always be trapped inside This darkness, where does the light hide? When there is light it is like a candle Too little for me to handle. Blindly, I stumble through life's halls Only to run into these steel walls. Dropping the candle, the flame flickers and dies Bringing back nothing but the darkness to my eyes. Where is the light when there is not But the dark and hopeless night? The darkness merely mocks me The light refusing to help me fight. As I sit here, watching everything fade I look back at the past, when I'm so near the grave. What ever happened to the light I had, When the world wasn't all so sad? © Back Up Empathy (A Suicides Handbook) This sodden mattress cradles my heart and Holds my hopes deep inside The dry cakes of flesh fall down the back of my throat The hangover clings on tightly Nothing can hold anymore I have nothing left to cling to All the seductive friendships have dried The paint has cooled underneath and I have nothing left to give, I am at an end Nowhere left to go and no one to talk to In an Earth of billions I am alone No one knows me, know one wants to know I don't know if I have the courage to continue My strength is gone I feel so fragile and weak Abandoned by the ones I love, they never really loved me It was all one sided Fractured, like me I can't hold on anymore and I wonder if this dry, caked razor I wonder if this is the end? © Back Up Final Relief Shallow water covers my ground. Swallowing my feet. I don't struggle. Pain strikes at my flesh from the water's coldness. My feet go numb. The water moves up to my thighs I don't struggle. The water grips tightly onto my tired muscles. Strength becomes weakness. I begin to fade. Yet I don't struggle. My lonely heart begins to slow My body starts to shake. The water rises to my breast Squeezing the breath from my lungs. I don't struggle. Blackness shades my vision. My mind becomes delirious. My body shuts down. I don't struggle. I fall down into the freezing void of wetness. I slowly drift to the bottom. My eyes begin to close. I feel nothing I see nothing My life almost gone. Everything is now erased. ...and I never once struggled. © Back Up Germs Drill the vein, blown away I have so many problems I've created more But I was born Make ourselves statistics on a suicide List and fly Pretend that we're the shining stars up in the sky And below Let them all keep circling round the beautiful Drill the vein, blown away Try to think how not if but I've lost the way Try to stay Strong enough to life my armour up to prey What is should? When I understand then I'll be understood Shelter me If loneliness is decay then I'm dying out Drill the vein, blown away Hand in hand I watch the daylight fading out Wonder how Chemicals can spin this hollow world around To the end Trigger happy, dye your blood red Doors are shut, guards are up Germs will outlive all of us so get out © Back Up Gothic Suicide Doll A doll dressed in black clothes and makeup Blood is seen at her plastic little wrists And the tears on her face are dark red This gothic doll wished to be missed Her legs were long and had dark scars And her hair was the color of black She has the power to kill people The thought of men make her wanna attack This little bad doll can never die Burn her if ya want but her soul will never fade Killing those who bother her everyday Living the dead life, she had it made The razor was her favorite toy And suicide was her obsession But when it came to her life It was filled with nothing but depression So in the end she wanted to kill herself But she never really intended to die She became the living dead girl doll By the practice of witchcraft, never again did she cry She was made of plastic and to never decay The makeup was permanent on her face Her soul still lives inside the twin doll And in a box on the store shelf was her place Just waiting for someone to buy her She cost only about twelve bucks But she doesn't want to be bought by any man Soon enough will they die cause she thinks they suck One thing she's glad of is that she is dead No more depression does she have to fight She will watch after those who are troubled And make them want to do what's right © Back Up Illusive Sanity Flickering purple luminesence Pulsating throughout the room Beating against the cracked walls Penetrating my every thought Pouring off of the ceiling like tar Seeping through my eyelids Without my objection, it proceeds to Force its way into my head Numbing my mind, I cant express displeasure Merrily probing along at it tears Apart my insides, coiling around My spine like a snakelike vine Absorbing my fluids like lucious wine Prying forcefully into my lungs Ripping through like strands of Barbed wire Flowing streams of liquid coolness, Suffocating my every breath Experiencing such an agonizing and Painfully torturous death, I display An emotionless and immobilized Transfixiated positioning as the Creature rapes me of my soul I've lost all control It devours my limp and lifeless Corpse, peircing through my flesh With an explosive burst into the air The skin flaps to the sides of My chest, leaving my ribcage Exposed, beheld a seeming hollow Emptiness and digested remains. © Back Up Liberation Close the eyes. Open the eye. Shadows flicker by, black flames. Incased in a blackened chamber. Colour is buried in their shrieks As they decompose, dead Yet alive to the abhorrence Of their bleeding souls Their tortured eyes, as they search For what is lost In the life they have lost. Open the eyes. Close the eye. No more shadows, white flames now. Incased in their sterile world of light. Now it is I who shriek and wail As they attempt to murder my spirit Forcing me onward down their paths Man-made and trial tested. A feeble excuse for a solution In the face of transience. To divulge the inner turmoil To a willing recepticle Is to enclose a white-walled coffin Around the soul As bitter bigoted laughter Punctures the heart, Incomprehension pierces the skin Sharper than the razor in your hand. With enemies on either side I sit afraid to die Afraid to live. Answers are not mine to find. So I play by the rules Of the living. Stealthily cheating daily. Covering all tracks. My escape is through magick. Hiding in nature. Living, breathing With the planet as a whole. Peace ebbs through tired viens. Yet evasion is a temporary commodity. The hidden are always found. And so I merely continue. Eyes closed. Eyes open. Eyes forgotten. Circle spinning endlessly into infinity. As I revolve with it. A bystander to a bystander's journey. Insanity draws ever nearer Smiling in the face of a web Self-woven by despair and rebellious curiosity Now threatening to disintangle. Close the eyes. Open the eye. Open the eyes. Close the eye. Hide from the eyes. Ignore the eye. If the circle were to break, discontinued As the lines faded backwards from the start... Would I find liberation? © Back Up Life Force... the searing pain goes down my arm as the blade penetrates the creamy flesh my essence dripping crimson, trickling down my hand into tiny pools on the virgin tile The only sound in the room is the soft drip, drip from my wrist the sun is shinning, the sky is blue, the birds are out I couldn't have asked for a nicer day I don't see the sky as blue its gray and silver the rain coming in buckets its like that everyday there isn't happiness or joy-just grief the knowledge I've hurt others beyond salvation I keep him at a distance so as not to infect him or anyone else for that matter, with my bitterness The room starts to blur my breathing becomes heavy as my heart slows drops of perspiration fall from my neck like icicles the knife clatters to the floor I start to sway and my knees give out I crash to the floor this moment I've been waiting for has arrived I hear a screaming inside my head as everything fades to black. Then I woke up in a hospital. Damn life force. © Back Up Metal Purgatory Nonentity,the nullity can't break into a life profound . Silence, the absent sound of insignificancy smothers the ground . Until when, a wind changes from within . An exstensive await for the touch i've fallen in . Three years of mortal life come unwound . With this immortal fragment of me i've found . Flawless,totally unblemished and beautiful . Strife, i'll fight, sacrifice my entire life . I'll fly, so gracefully. Across the earth upon wings of a mechanical angel . Along my path i'll feel the wrath . Of despair, for three and a half . Descend,decline like a star on fire . Arrive, blown in by the storm of desire . The wretched, enchanted by a picture animated . This reflection in those eyes, cast so perfectly . So beautifully, i'm disarmed completely . As my head hits the soft comfort of her temple . The room quakes, forces the soul windows to wake . Ours meet within a few empty feet . And from the light in sight, attention can't break . Bitter departures, Torn away by the reality vultures . By distasted wings I fly, pain sets fire to the back tracked sky . Acid laced tears burn . With a promise to return © Back Up My Mind My mind is filled with, dark and twisted corridors. A labrynth with no exit. Where my insanity lives, and my thoughts, flow freely. Where evil kills, my self esteem, and what pure thoughts, I might of had. Where demons dwell. Demons that bring, sins of envy, wrath, sloth, and lust. Where thoughts of suicide reign. With a dash of depression, and a handful of confusion. Take in this deep look of, inside my mind. But realize i'm not insane, just scared and confused. Feeling so empty. Everything thats around me seems so creepy The lit candle that was burning, fades away I close my eyes, thinking deeply Clutching my bare fist tight, coping with all my pain The salty tear that runs down from my soggy eye Carries my emotions away with it My heart turned so cold, now I only wish I could cry I feel so...... empty The stars in the night sky, no longer do they twinkle No longer do I have the rage to bash my head against the wall I use to hate my life, but its gotten worse, no longer do I careI sat, stared blankly, watching my whole salvation fall I quit cutting my wrist, Theres no need, I'm already dead I'll do anything because I'm stupid Just lay, rott away, let my skin shed I feel so.... empty © Back Up My World storming clouds endless graveyards rivers overflowing with blood corpses rotting in the middle of streets lightning bolts striking trees that bare no leafs upon them black spiders walking in endless circles fires burning genocide being commited left and right of me harsh painful screams endless torture blood striken seraphims capitulate to demons beneath a silver moon clocks that tell no time yet mock those who stand before them groups of people calling upon the angel of darkness for protection from the light hateful teens cutting their wrists open because life has nothing else to offer them broken hearts lying on the muddy ground from those who discover the atrocity that love really is THIS IS THE WORLD THAT EXISTS WITHIN MY MIND!!! © Back Up Not A Punishment Flowing chaotic patterns Flash before my eyes An endless dot-to-dot Invisable lines cross one another Pain fades A cut is made and blood flows Twisted. Yes, twisted I do this not for death The fact is, I like the blood, the pain It keep me from blubbering like an idiot ...keeps me sane... Rub the blood away The cut grins and blood pours from it's teeth Cat's eyes, yellow and brown Red, crimson pooling in my palm Black cat watches sharp eyes glowing Arcane pratice Smoothly it sinks into shadow Wetness drips from my arm Pain shrivials I lift myself and stare at Razor's art Finger's stained in dried pain Make a fist and the blood is gone Pain vanished... Cuts...razors...lost to oblivion... I open brown eyes And view what I only wished The pain returns Minus the wound Just a dream ...a dream... 'Pain is not a punishment...but a work of art.' © Back Up Poem: Killing Angel Darkness is cast upon an ususpecting soul it feeds on its fear and drinks of its tears it seeps into its insides and plants itself deep it stays there, planted there for an eternity of sadness the soul can not escape it is trapped in darkness in an endless river of pain and suffering far beyond the reach of light into the deepest shadow falling like an angel into this lost world controlled by humans, like a puppet without strings.....the soul is lost, and draind,full of rage, and suffering, bursting into a thousand flames forever haunting,forever death,forever nothing, nothing is there. © Back Up Red i feel the pierce of steel as the tip breaks through my flesh i push with all my might wincing in pain so much life so much red hold back my cries as blood cools colliding with air the pain to end all pain i have no will to fight the constant battle of life i just lost my will i lost desire i am not depressed there has to be an up for there to be a down i watch my life drip down onto the floor so much red yet im dead inside the pain to end all pain in my wet hands i hold the end of life my legs buckle as i fall my insides painting out covered in my life i die the final insult when no one gives a damn i am lucky im not alive to see i dont matter the pain to end all pain my blood is so thin as was my life © Back Up Reject The Skin lurch forward the buggy's in full gear what is of the frontal assault it so pathetic reject the skin crafted and grafted to a mold a mold of all of the useless fucks that invade this world and say they have a solution the fucking pricks who wear shirts with a band they have never heard of what the hell is it so futile to try and explain to anybody they just don't understand they all get mixed up its a fucking rebel the dancing men are on the ridge CONVERGE on the men who defile the old who release the evil the dead should not know of what has happened its no matter we shall soon be with them utter stupidity © Back Up Suffering Walking barefoot on a floor that is layered with broken glass Sleeping on a bed of nails She burns in the fire her heart is pierced with pins she cuts herself the wound left open painful and bleeding she rubs salt in the wound she smashes her mirror she's grown tired of her reflection she swallows the mirror losing the reflection inside of her she feels everything inside of her dying and she crys but she knows no one will help her nothing can bring back all that she's lost she's abandoned prayer abandoned god and abandoned hope with nothing left she sleeps she surrenders she dies © Back Up The Burning Of My Flesh The problems never get solved in my head They just build up creating a bunch of insanity No way ever in this life I have always lived Will I be able to fully control my sanity I replay my past over and over You will find that clouded is my mind But the only thing I want to succeed Is the reality of suicide that I always find As is in my parents car all alone I reach over and push the car lighter in I wait until it's fully ready to use Then I start to burn my own skin It hurts for about a minute there But then it starts to take away the pain The more the burns on the arm The less and less does your mind go insane Scars form on my arm a day later As I try to hide them to stay invisible Trouble will come all the way If I leave these burns completely visible As the days of my depression go on and on Taking control of my mind I won't be able to do And nobody is there to help me Nobody can make me happy and keep me through Burning and cutting keeps the pain away And begins to make me feel alive But never can I be a normal teenager One who can always learn how to thrive © Back Up The Oncoming Madness I awaken in astonished horrid fright Above me the moon glows large, red and bright Crimson light dances on the trees In a pine and fir forest as far as my eye sees I hold a knife in my hand And in the far end of a pool of blood I stand The sticky liquid is splattered over my naked flesh My nostrils fill with death new and fresh And upon my lips the taste of life As my tongue slides across the knife In the clearing where I stand Numerous corpses litter the land While others are tied to trees The sight drops me to my knees A chilly wind tassels my hair And from behind a tree trunk a girl catches my stare Her poorly muffled sobs ring in my ear The from inside me the hunter did appear I went for her in the shadows where she was blind And lunged on her from behind On came forgotten tormented memories and dreams Adding terror to my animalistic screams The blade dug in flesh firm and tender The struggle ceased as death was upon her Cold rain, tears and thoughts emerge in a flood As my mouth goes to the source of the blood For a moment a dark silence is all around And then I catch another sound Voices cheerily whispering in the darkness Unaware of the oncoming madness © Back Up True Moments Of Terror True moments of terror abound, bloody moonlight shines dusty red rays, a dark evil sweeps over a forgotten horizon, this ground saturated through and through, consecrated bones buried here and there, cadavers piled high to sit and rot, wild animals cry in the dark of the night, monster eyes shine again, that familiar feeling takes hold, the loss a calm before the storm, who is left to despise their demise, screams of absolute horror ring forth, the gnarled old tree moans and groans, winds whistle the songs of the dead, and then there is nothing more. © Back Up Twisted Life The growing dark takes hold of me, the devil inside is fond of me. It consumes my soul and rapes my mind. Torments me and wishes me to die, I try to run I try to hide, but the devil is always there, always inside. I no longer fear it, because i know the devil is you, the second voice in my head. With each day, with each breath my f*cking devil takes. Insanity grows stronger, my blackouts keep getting longer. With each word that I fake, and each lie that I make. You gaines some strength and takes some control, your someone i used to talk with in my head. And now you are the one making me feel hate. The irony of it all, is that the thing that is killing me is ..... ME. No one can save me but myself, but now i can't think, think why i should even try. I wonder if I feel pain, when I and my devil... is dead. © Back Up An Empty Hole On The Road To... Part One: 'The birth of the empty hole and it's destruction the feelings only exist in my head and my thoughts are only heard by the dead I never met you but i like you too much more then you'll ever know the stupid things i say, about such and such but i'll always know that i'm in a cage i can't keep tricking myself into another crush following my useless rage my thoughts melt and leak into your head but there's a wall of flesh blocking your perfect soul i'm just a rotting old fish trapped in a fish bowl all the energy flowing away to nothing makes a empty hole in my head and it has nothing to support it from driving me insane 'for it makes me feel useless and deader then dead' Part Two? '...as i cross over to the road of insanity' the empty hole gets bigger every dayis this a pay i need to pay? for trying to feed unheard soul to my bliss is there anything to life but this? but i'm just making me feel like a worm crawling to the dreams i always have of you i laugh and cry and i left behind a trail of goo as i pass you you just appear as a ghost to me now i still have feelings for you, quiet a few a lonely fool forever walking... ...down the road of self-destructed passion with your voice on the edge of my every thought, talking ...I HAD FEELINGS FOR YOU WITHOUT NO ONE TO KNOW AS THE HOLE IN MY HEAD CONTINUES TO GROW... © Back Up "Depth" Embedded agony that was deeply carved Flowed blood by scrape, till scar Decend within, decend so far Exposed to the sting, of the slash and life Layers reveal stories, by ragged brands of a knife Release pours, yet captured strife Tender flesh, wounds begin eternal bleed Striving for escape, striving deep inside for me Yet swallowed by blade, no soul as mine i can see Bewitched by the image, truth shown Mysteries employ by lies, on flesh forever grown Parted to emptiness, never eternaly sewn Slits form, by blood-stained tears upon my face Sliding acid, tearing like the blades grace Ingulfed by obsession, pains embrace.... ....no escape..... © Back Up Killing Me silenced by the sirens hell opens its gates with the demonic sounds of violens. a vigerously vile stench echoes from the maggot infested corpses that illumamatically decorate my hallway. fountians of blood repell down my whip beaten chest. Saranaded screams of the evils within things call to my stone chiseled heart. The weather beaten corspe of my signifigant other shy's from the gates of eternal d@mn-nation. Energetic displays of valgar animosity Plunge forth brusing my flesh. My faith is displayed in the ceptic vision of hell unholy angles as they feed apon my lifeless essence. A tayste of the washed away desires of the one i love scorch my reptilic like scales that plague me. A pitch fork named desire arches my body higher as the salt saturated rains torment my mentally exposed thoughts. tears subside with no place to hide but in the pockets of laserations upon my mutalated flesh. Soil an grime interupt my place in time as the hands bleed upon me. Dead to the world with the lost love of my girl i wrap my hands around my neck. Rejected by the faith that once allowed dead angles to feed apon my essence. I end up regreting the day i was born still my eyes glimmer as my weakened heart lets out its last shimmers. In a blackened plague my minds eye gets vague and i saturate the walls with my urine. Splintered in waste in the eve of my doom i can feel his infernal nails peirce my face. Ripping away my smile i stagger to the pile of those who love me. It has been said again and again, with what we love, we distroy and the temptations of life string us along like a toy. Chilled in the heat of these words ill repeat for it was my love of nothing that was killine me. © Back UpLiving Dead rain pouring down on me once again all alone in this hell bleeding Nothing spent so many years praying i would die prayers finally answered sorrow swallowed my mind no feeling left no love, no hate Nothing Left to do but sit and wait for my body to join my rotting brain to die, to be free to be rid of this pain can't survive in a world designed to destroy me in every way can't go on living in this world of sh*t killing me a little more each day thoughts became my enemy before my mind passed away Nothing but negative sh*t all the time Nothing good to say it's been months, since i have felt a heartbeat beneath my chest years since love withered and died not even tolerance at best i loathe myself for going on can't kill myself yet just not that strong thinking back to better days when i could blame others for my f*cked up ways but when no one is left to take the blame see the cause and effect are one in the same fell apart and lost the pieces only a broken shell remains shooting myself to pass the time but, i can't even feel the pain wish i could say i hate you but i don't know who you are it's all my fault, i should be dead by now can't believe it's gone this far can't fight anymore, can't even convince myslef that it's all in my head i slit my wrists, but there's no blood i am the living dead i can't die ©
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