Dickie Roberts : Former Child Star

What's the Plot?

Back in the 1970's, little Dickie Roberts was THE "man" of the moment. He could do no wrong. The beloved child star of the hugely popular American TV sitcom, The Glimmer Gang, he was adored by millions of viewers who were captivated by his quirky charms and his catch phrase: " this is nucking futs!" Then he turned six! The ratings plummeted; the show was cancelled and the Dickie Roberts phenomenon ended for everyone.... except for Dickie Roberts. Now a 35 year old parking valet, Dickie (David Spade) is convinced that he can rise out of his obscurity to become a star again, if only he can get a break and land a major role. His "celebrity boxing" and attempted cosmetic surgery have not bought him the fame he still craves so when he hears about "the must-have" role in director Rob Reiner's (himself) new film, Dickie goes all-out for it. However, Dickie is stunned when Rob tells him that he isn't normal enough for the role due to his childhood life in the spotlight. So, to win the role, he surmises that if he re-lives his childhood, he can win it. Now all he has to do is find a family stupid, or desperate enough, to take him as a member of their own... and help him become normal. Sounds easy, right?

The Review

Dickie Roberts is really only going to work if you've ever lived in the United States, or if you're a real American TV fan. The film's beginning sequence is a true delight for anyone who's ever seen the entertainment programme E! With a hilarious "Hollywood story of Dickie Roberts", it hints that David Soul was his father and explores what his mother did do to her son, and his money!

After that it starts to get a bit stale, and very American with cameo's and jokes that only work if you're over the age of 30 and have watched a lot of US TV shows and films. Corey Haim, Corey Feldman and the bloke who played Saved By The Bell's Skreech are among the more recognisable cameo's which doesn't say a lot. The actual plot involving Dickie paying to stay with a normal family pushes the envelope of believability, even for a comedy. However, clichés are still rolled out: the children think he's a loser until he defends them against the local bully thus becoming cool; the mum is "hot" and the dad is a cheater allowing the way clear for our star; the daughter gets help from Dickie in mini-cheerleader try-out's (which is funny BUT disturbing as a 7/8 year old girl does a raunchy Britney Spears).

With such a way-out concept, you expect more from the plot, but it never delivers. What it does have going for it though is an amazing end title piece where a who's-who of both instantly-recognisable and not-so famous actors perform a Band Aid-type song: Child Stars On Your TV. From Differn' Strokes to The Brady Bunch and Happy Days, there's a better time had trying to put names to the faces as they each sing a line of the song than there was watching the rest of the whole movie, which has got to be a bad sign, surely? Saturday Night Live, please stay on your side of the Atlantic.

STEVE'S SCORE