: : Summary : : Evy asks Rick a question he doesn't particularly want to answer...equal parts When Harry Met Sally, American Pie, and Oscar Wilde...silly fluff of a dialogue...Enjoy, and as always, review:)
women like to be a man's last romance."
...Oscar Wilde
Rick and Evy have a little talk...
Note: This was originally part of one of my other stories, then I got the idea for this "talk" that Rick and Evy were bound to have, and I�ve always thought that the concept of ellbee�s "Conversation with a Door" was really awesome, and then for good measure I thought I�d throw in a little "American Pie" with the whole "rule of three" thing, and it's also a bit reminiscent of "When Harry Met Sally."
Premise: Takes place after Rick and Evy have run into a grade-school crush of hers...
�Daniel and I were actually a bit of an...item, in grade school.�
�You dated that guy?�
�Shh, shh, no! We held hands on the playground, it was nothing.�
�I knew I didn't like him.�
�Oh, come on, Rick, we were eight years old.�
�I feel the sudden need to punch him.�
�Fine. Then while we�re on the subject of my grammar school boyfriend, let�s delve into the laundry list of your ex-paramours.�
�That�s not fair!�
�Why not? You�re the one who brought it up.�
�I did not bring that up!�
A pause.
�So...how many?�
�How many what?�
�How many women have you...been with?�
�How did we get on this topic?�
�Answer the question.�
�This is not the time or the place to be having this discussion!�
�Fine. We'll have it later.�
Several minutes of fuming silence.
�So?�
�So, what?�
�How many?�
�I don�t want to talk about this!�
�Why not?�
�Because it�s not...You won�t like whatever answer I give!�
�I want to know.�
�It�s not like I�ve kept an inventory!�
�That many?!�
�What answer do you want?�
�The truthful one!�
�Well, is this including schoolyard crushes?�
�No! I meant...been with, been with.�
�What�s yours, then?�
�One.�
�Including me, right?�
Silence.
�Oh my God.�
�What? Like your track record is so spotless?�
�Who?!�
�You say that with such disbelief.�
�I just can�t believe you didn�t tell me!�
�Well it�s not something you bring up on your wedding night!�
Again, silence.
�The rule of three.�
�What?�
�If a woman says she's been with one guy, it really means three.�
�That�s absurd. It�s one.�
�Fine.�
�Are you going to answer the question?�
�But you�re already mad at me!�
�Besides, it works the other way, too. If a man says three, it means one, or maybe even zero.�
�I really don't want to answer the question now.�
�Just answer it!�
�Look. If I say zero, you�ll know I�m lying.�
�Is it below hundred?�
�What do you think I am?�
�Fine. Below fifty?�
�Yes!�
�Twenty?�
�Yes!�
�Ten?�
Silence.
�Between ten and nineteen?!�
�I�m thinking!�
�You have to think about it?!�
�In twenty seven years you accumulate some ex-girlfriends, okay? It happens!�
�Ex-girlfriends, hmm? What about...you know...�
�What are you implying?�
�Oh, come on, Rick, you think I�m stupid? I�ve been around Jonathan long to enough to know what goes on--�
�Okay, okay! I admit there�s been...you know...�
�I�ve changed my mind, I don�t want to know.�
�This is just a little weird, okay? Talking about your past sex life with your wife is not my ideal conversation!�
�I said I didn't want to know!!!�
More silence.
�Evy?�
�What?�
�Can I tell you something?�
�No.�
�Ask me again. I have the truthful answer.�
�What?�
�Ask me the question again.�
�Fine. How many women have you...you know.�
�Probably more than you want to know.�
�Rick! I said I didn�t want to know!�
�But...�
�But?�
�I�ve only made love with one.�
�Oh, Rick.�
�I love you, Evy.�
�I love you, too.�