Remarkably, when searching a dictionary the word DOMME isn�t listed. Likewise, the name Bilbo Baggins is not listed in Who�s Who or in any historical publication. That said a domme is apparently the female version of a �dominant� male. Consequently if anyone knows a word that means 'a female version of a male myth please forward it to me.
However, some of the pathetic names dommes use are definable:
Mistress: a woman (other than a wife) having a sexual relationship with a married man.
Madam: a female brothel-keeper.
According to the grapevine, the �dominant� female falls into two categories �pro� / �non pro�, each are discussed below.
Their affection for dominating and their unquestionable subject knowledge has resulted in these delinquents charging pitiful male submissives, who have nothing better on which to spend their hard earned unemployment benefit, for their extremely over-rated �skills�.
However, the service they provide is comparable with the selection you make on a coffee vending machine in as far as you part with monies and select exactly what you require. Consequently, we enter the scenario where the �dominant� is doing exactly as the �submissive� requested.
Habitat:
The �dominant� female operates from squalid accommodation that contain her tools of the trade i.e. second hand cash register and a phone line thus enabling Johns to book appointments.
Identifying Marks:
Pro dommes are easily identified by the chip on their shoulder brought about by the endless hours they have spent trying to convince the knowledgeable that professional domination isn�t prostitution.
Their love of leather, especially the type that contains money and credit cards.
The non pro domme is an erratic drama queen desperately trying to seek sexual attention from spineless doormats. Her need to dominate in a relationship is brought about by one of two factors:
In her previous relationship her old man had her under his thumb until he saw the light and dumped her carcass for a younger slimmer and fitter model. Hence she views being �dominant� as a means of holding a relationship together and guaranteeing her sexual intercourse at her convenience, as opposed to when her ex husband was bored and couldn�t be bothered to masturbate.
Due to not being able to find a �Master� she has dropped her �I�m a submissive� shag-me-tag and in a desperate attempt to find sex, taken on the �I�ll order you to shag my hideous carcass" mantle.
Whichever of the aforementioned repressed categories the domme originates from, the fact that she was very single, rented a computer, stumbled across BDSM, looked at the pictures on a topic related web site and immediately created a �dominant� screen name cannot be overlooked.
Habitat:
The domme lives within waddling distance of three key structures, McDonalds, Dunkin D@nuts and a Kebab Van / shop.
Identifying Marks:
The non pro domme is extremely competent when it comes to using the tools of her trade, namely the computer photo editing software that she uses to transform a ten year old EXTREMELY hideous picture into a ten year old hideous picture.
Their online profiles that are crammed with wit e.g. 'Computer � a submissive one'. Occasionally some of their profiles contain simple instructions like 'DO NOT IM ME WITHOUT PERMISSION'. This �command� is as strict as they ever get as once you�ve complied and bothered to e-mail her lonely carcass, the dommes' desperation for sex means that she�ll do anything to please you.
Their pathetic habit of addressing fellow fat ugly self proclaimed �dominant� females as �sis� in Internet chat rooms.
