First a bit of background:

My mom and dad got divorced about six years ago. Since then it’s just been my mom, my sister and I. I get to see my dad once a month as he lives in Sarawak and I live in KL. It’s hard to fly up and visit him as much as I’d like to due to this little thing called money which my family is short of. I’ve also haven’t seen my mom with another man since the divorce since she wants us to grow up before she gets involved in a relationship again.

The Event:

About four weeks ago my dad called my mom up in a drunken rampage and screamed at her for a good hour about how he was cheating on her while they were married, how he’s not going to pay child support and how my mom was the scum of the earth. This caused my mom to fall into an emotional breakdown and she was pretty f***ed up that night. I came home from work and she was completely drunk. To be honest, I’ve never seen someone so drunk in my entire life. She was telling me about the phone call and how she wished my dad would just die. She was really open with her feelings and emotions and she was telling me a lot.

She offered me some beer and I accepted, as I go crazy for that stuff. I love beer and I really just wanted to help her out. The last thing I wanted to do is refuse something from her and then have her start crying again. I had about seven cans and I started to get a little tipsy when she put her arm on me. Now usually I just push away as I hate the ‘mushy’ stuff from my mom. She always wants to spend time with me and touch me in a ‘mom – son’ way. Just love for your child I suppose but this time, I just accepted it I was really too drunk to care.

What happened after this was completely unexpected. I’ve never thought about my mom this way before, not even the slightest. She’s my mom for f*** sakes. My mom told me to shut my eyes, and she kissed me on the lips. I was completely stunned. I didn’t know what to do so I just sat there.

“I love you John” not my real name by the way.

“Umm… I love you too mom”

By this point, I was completely confused, even more so for a drunk. I didn’t have the slightest clue what was going on.

“No, Not like that John…”

She put her hand on my lap over my family jewels and then kissed me again. She then started kissing me furiously and passionately. She then pulled off her shirt and mine and pretty much, well pushed me onto the floor. She was on top of me and there was really not much I could do. I was being seduced by my own mom. I couldn’t believe it. Then we made a huge mistake…we had sex. I didn’t even want this. I didn’t even want my mom to touch me; I hate it when she touches me but the effects of alcohol took its place and turned us into horrible monsters. Although I don’t like to admit it, I had never had sex this great. We finished up and she left to go to the washroom to clean up. I don’t remember anything else about the night. I probally went to sleep waiting for her to come back. A lot of the night is fragmented and even today I still have trouble remembering it completely. In the morning she never mentioned it at all and she acted completely normal despite the fact that she f***ed her own son.

The Problem:

Everything went fine up until today when my mom called me up at work.

“John, we need to talk. It’s really important”

I didn’t know what was going on. I thought maybe someone died or she found my porn cd's.

“Yeah Mom... What is it?”

“I feel really uncomfortable about it; I don’t think I can explain it to you on the Phone”

I told my mom that was alright and I’d be home from work in an hour and we could talk about it then.

I get home and I see that my mom is sitting on the couch. Her face was all red, and I could tell that something really bad happened. It looked like she was crying for a long time.

“What’s wrong?” I asked her

“I think I’m pregnant”

I was completely shocked. My mom hasn’t even dated another guy since she divorced my dad and I was a hundred percent sure that she wasn’t seeing another guy.

“Did you take a test?”

“Yeah, it’s positive”

We just sat there completely still. I didn’t know what to say.

What should I do? I want to call her out and find out what’s going on. This entire dilemma is killing me psychologically. I accept being criticized as i'd much accept advices from you guys, i was googling the whole of malaysia until i stumble upon the largest malaysian community on the web which is lowyat hoping that you guys can help me out.

If mods think this isn't suitable in kopitiam please move it to somewhere else but please don't close it. Im thinking of abortion but what do you guys think? Please help