The Them is a proclaimed intense, punk-metal band that seeks the edge of horror, violence and inner turmoil. The play punk music composed of memorable melodies and heavy grooves. Their influences include The Misfits, Slayer, and New York Hardcore. The Them is a group of questionable mortals, names like: Joseph Christ on vocals (one of the best lyricists in the Seattle punk scene), Sethalicious on bass (he doesn't wear much clothing and I hear he has a big cock), Jimmy Hall on guitars, and The Barry on drums. Their live shows kick ass. I asked The Them some questions:

ELEKTRA LUXX: How did you cunts become a band?

THE THEM: It was actually the 13th step of our failed rehabs. Unfortunately we forgot steps 2 through 12 and just went straight for the jugular. We might go back and finish off the other steps when we get done with this one but we have yet to decide. We're no quitters. So, needless to say, Joseph met Seth while they were boozing it up, who met Barry when he was just finished boozing it up and they all met Jimmy just as he was starting to booze it up. Somewhere in there we make music and get laid. (Though it's probably more the former than the latter because of our ugly mugs.)

ELEKTRA LUXX: Do you eat raw meat?

THE THEM: Do you mean as a band collectively�all at the same time? We're all pretty much omnivores except for Seth who's a vegetarian until it becomes a hassle. Then he comes over to the dark side with us. We respect that sort of follow-through and loyalty in our band.

ELEKTRA LUXX: Are you still beating Bettie Page?

THE THEM: We never really beat on her. We hired Ike Turner to do that for us because nothing turns us on more than a black man beatin' on a white woman. That song had sort of become our "something we didn't expect." We essentially wrote it because we thought it would piss off all the Rockabilly people. Then all the rockabilly people ended up liking it and we kept getting booked at rockabilly shows where they had no fucking clue what to do with us. So we would just get drunk, obnoxious and bloody drunk�I would get on the mic and say "cunt" a lot. You know�that old chestnut.

ELEKTRA LUXX: Tell me about your favorite groupie?

THE THEM: That would be "superfan" from Valejo, California. He heard us through a cell phone and then went to a club and got into a fistfight with every other band because they weren't us. I'm sure all the booze helped. We don't get any female groupies�our jeans aren't tight enough and none of us wear mascara.

ELEKTRA LUXX: What do you have coming up in the future?

THE THEM: We've been trying to finish our full length for about forever now. We have an EP that's out now called "THEY RISE" and a promotional cd called "PROMOTUTION." We just finished up some last drum parts and are ready to mix the full length which should be out sometime between now and the second coming of Adolf Christ. If everything goes right, which it won't, we'll be playing shows (June 15th at Funhouse with 20,000 Volts and October 29th at Galway Arms with Lack of Respect), tours down to California and a two week tour down to LA and Las Vegas are in the planning stages for the summer.

ELEKTRA LUXX: Why is a mouse when it runs?

THE THEM: Big Dicks.

THE END.

Interview by Elektra Luxx