2) Get all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
3) Make a trail of orange juice on the floor, leading to the restrooms.
4) Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in house-wares," and see what happens.
5) Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they don't realize it.
6) Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
7) Put M&M's on layaway.
8) Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
9) Set up a tent in the camping dpepartment. Tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from bed and bath.
10) When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
11) Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
12) Move "Caution: Wet Floor" sings to the carpeted areas.
13) Ask other customers if they have had any Grey Poupon.
14) While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
15) Switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the bathroom.
16) Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission: Impossible.
17) Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
18) In auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.
19) Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse though, say things like "Pick me! Pick me!"
20) When an announcement comes of the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"
21) If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink. Explain that you don't get out much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
And last but not least...
22) Go into the dressing room and yell really loud, "Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"