T'WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE THE AUCTION,
AND ALL THROUGH THE HOUSE,
NOT A CREATURE WAS STIRRING,
NOT EVEN JIM'S MOUSE.
WITH JIM IN HIS KERCHIEF,
AND HELEN HER CAP,
THEY HAD JUST SETTLED DOWN,
TO A BEFORE AUCTION NAP.
WHEN DOWN IN THE BASEMENT
THERE AROSE SUCH A CLATTER,
THAT JIM SPRANG FROM HIS BED,
TO SEE WHAT WAS THE MATTER.
WHEN WHAT TO HIS WONDERING
EYES SHOULD APPEAR,
BUT EIGHT BUGS IN HIS PROGRAM,
THEY STRUCK HIM WITH FEAR.
HE DASHED TO HIS KEYBOARD,
AND PULLED UP THE CODE,
"I SURE BETTER FIX THIS
OR I'LL BE IN A LOAD"
HIS SCREEN WAS ALL SCRAMBLED,
AND HIS PRINTER WAS MESSED.
HE CUSSED AND HE SHOUTED,
NOW SURELY YOU JEST
SO HE LIT UP A STOGY,
AND LEANED BACK IN HIS CHAIR,
AND SAID SCREW YOU MACHINE,
AND SEE IF I CARE.
NOW THE DOCTOR HE SHOUTED,
HIS BRAIN MELTED DOWN,
"I'VE GOT IT - I'LL RUN,
I'LL LEAVE THIS DAMN TOWN!"
NOW WE ALL KNOW HE'LL STAY,
AND FINISH THE TASK,
FOR THE END OF THE AUCTION,
IS ALL THAT HE ASKED.
AND ONCE IT IS OVER,
THE COMPUTERS SHUT DOWN,
HE'LL SAY, "DAMN NICE JOB.
I'M KING OF THIS TOWN."
NOW THE AUCTION HAS ENDED,
THE MACHINES CALLED A TRUCE,
UNTIL '93
WHEN ALL HELL SHALL BREAK LOOSE!
Author believed to be Dave Murphy
Author believed to be Dave Murphy