The Opposite Of Attraction – Part Seven: The Deal

Aamalie: Happy Birthday to good ol' President Lincoln-grins- ...wait, what about Valentine’s? Bah. Screw that. It’s not what got me outta school today. But speaking of that... Where is Joe? He hasn’t been online all day... Oh, there he is.

All of you Mir/San fans shall go and watch “House of Flying Daggers” promptly. Trust me. You’ll adore it. The main characters are eerily Miroku-ish and Sango-ish. But yeah. Sorry it took so long. Last week was a pain. Blame it on a funeral, exit exams, and various other things.

Disclaimer: Hum de dum...

-

Voices melded into her consciousness, pulling Sango from her dreams. Slowly, as she became more aware, it seemed that the words being spoken grew a bit clearer. Yet, at the same time, she couldn’t catch all of what was being said. It was as if something was muffling the noise.

“So, rem...stop gr...mance her!”

“...know. Don’t...”

“Then act... you know...”

“Fine...go...I wil...suggestion...trick...”

Sango cracked an eye open, the drowsiness of sleep still upon her. She glanced at the digital clock on the other side of the room, her eyebrows drawing together when she saw it read only 3:11 am. Stifling a yawn, she looked over her shoulder and found that her bedmate was strangely absent. As ready to return to rest as Sango was, she was also halfway tempted to go find Miroku, until the murmuring of voices reached her again.

“...like...idea...”

“I’ll...later...night.”

“Goodnight.”

Sango pushed herself up to face the door just as it opened and Miroku entered the room. He closed it behind him as quietly as he could, only to freeze when he saw that she was watching him. She couldn’t see his face thanks to the dark, but for some reason, Sango got the impression that he was nervous.

“What’s going on?” she asked, tilting her head to the side as she tried to see him better.

He didn’t answer for the stretch of time it took for him to cross the room and sit down on the bed, the mattress creaking beneath his weight. Sango almost jumped when he touched her cheek with his fingers softly, and she could see his soft smile now, lit by the scarce moonlight that filtered through the semi-sheer curtains that covered the windows. “It’s nothing. I was just checking on Shippou.”

“But I heard you talking to someone...” Sango said. She saw Miroku’s forehead crease a little, but only for a fraction of a second.

“Just someone who works for the show. They clean up the house and set things up when we’re asleep. It’s no big deal. Go back to sleep, Sango.” His hand dropped from her cheek to her shoulder, pulling her back down to the pillow gently and lying down himself. Much to Sango’s surprise, he slid his arm around her waist in a sort of loose hug. After a tense moment of indecision, she let it slide and closed her eyes once more.

-

A laughable sight greeted Sango when she finally found Miroku and Shippou the next morning. The child was sitting on the ground in front of the television, slack-jawed and completely ignoring the bowl of cereal next to him, the contents of which were growing very soggy. Miroku was on the couch, half-reclined and staring off into space. Sango couldn’t help but grin at the way he looked with an almost perplexed expression on his face, as it did look rather silly. It was only when she shifted to lean against the doorframe that he caught sight of her with his peripheral vision, and he practically leapt up to greet her.

“At long last, the sleeping beauty has awakened!” he exclaimed, approaching her.

Sango’s lips quirked slightly, and she leveled a skeptical stare his way. “Running out of original lines, Miroku? I would have never guess your words would fail you so quickly.”

“Hey, I object to that. Cliché can be good sometimes. Besides, it’s not my fault you took so long to get up.”

“Why didn’t you come get me if you wanted me to wake up?” Sango returned, a tad bemused. Miroku jerked a thumb over his shoulder towards Shippou, as though to say that he hadn’t wanted to leave the kid alone, which she found a tad silly. “You could have left him by himself for a few minutes, you know.”

“After yesterday? I don’t think so.”

Miroku. Look at him... He's watching cartoons. He's transfixed. Hypnotized. Staring blankly at a changing screen that won't cease to enrapture him for at least another hour.”

“That's what you think.” When Sango gave him another look, Miroku sighed and shook his head before he spoke again. “Never mind. Just watch him for a bit? It’s been ages since I’ve seen the interior of a bathroom, and you, m’love, are already showered and dressed. How can I compare to your radiance if I’m still in my PJs?”

Hn... You’ll pose for the cameras, regardless. Just go; I’ll watch him. And spare me the compliments.”

Unexpectedly, Miroku leaned forward and tapped her nose with his index finger, almost dotingly. “Never.” And then, he strolled out of the room without another word said, leaving Sango on the brink of utter embarrassment. Thankfully, her empty stomach was kind enough to distract her from her humiliation.

So, with a cautionary glance to make sure that Shippou was still distracted by the cartoon (which was annoyingly focused on repeating something about maps at the moment), Sango headed off to the kitchen.

When she returned, contentedly popping a piece of Pop Tart into her mouth, Sango found that things weren’t as she’d left them.

The TV was on. The bowel of soggy cereal was there.

But Shippou was missing.

If Miroku had been there, Sango reflected, now would be about the time he’d say, “I told you so.”

Dropping her breakfast onto the coffee table, Sango began her hunt for the missing Shippou. It took a good five minutes of poking her head into rooms and calling the child’s name until she finally found him in the game room. She hadn’t been in there since the day she’d arrived, when she and Miroku had explored their temporary home. That was partially because she didn’t like the room. Not that it wasn’t a nice place— it was actually very upscale, with a fancy pool table and dart boards and an expansive display of decorative knives over by the bay window.

It looked eerily like she had always imagined the billiard room in that game, Clue.

Professor Plum with the pipe, anyone?

However, Sango wasn’t really concerned about middle-aged professors in purple sneaking up behind her with a metal murder weapon in hand. She was more concerned with those knives on display, and the fact that someone had left the key in the lock of the glass case. Shippou, somehow, had managed to unlock and open that case, despite his small size, and was now examining them with a grin on his face.

Sango wasted no time in rushing over there, practically knocking aside the cameraman that had been tailing Shippou the whole time, and pulled the kid away from the display. She all but slammed the glass door shut, turning the lock and shoving the key into her pocket before she turned back to Shippou.

“What do you think you were doing?” she demanded, frowning down at the short little redhead. He returned her scowl with an innocent gaze.

“Looking.”

Sango forced herself to take a long, calming breath before she exploded. “You should have asked either Miroku or me if you wanted to see this stuff. You could have gotten hurt, playing with those knives.”

If possible, Shippou’s eyes widened even more innocently. “Those are real knives?”

“...Yes.”

“Cool!” At Sango’s reprimanding look, he altered his response. “I’m sorry, Miss Sango. I won’t do it again. I just thought it was okay because that guy with the camera was here, and he didn’t say that I couldn’t.”

It’s okay, Shippou,” she said, before rounding on the cameraman, fully intending to give him a piece of her mind as it came to children and knives. By the time she was done, though, she made another discovery.

Shippou had disappeared again. And so, with a sigh of annoyance, Sango went off to find him. Again.

This time, she found him in the spare bathroom, which had been opened to accommodate their temporary guest. Apparently, nobody had thought to empty out the cabinets beneath the sink before it was opened, because Shippou had. He beamed when he saw her.

“Hey, Sango! What’re these?” he asked, holding up what, after a moment, Sango recognized to be tampons. “They’re really funny looking. What’re they used for?”

“Ah, Shippou!” Sango cried, dropping to her knees and hurriedly trying to shove everything back under the sink. As soon as she did so, Shippou let out a squeak and ducked past Sango and out of the bathroom. Shoving the cabinet shut, Sango scrambled after the child.

Goodness, that kid was fast!

“Looking for someone?” Miroku asked congenially as she broke into the living room again. In one hand, he held Shippou loosely by the collar, and in the other something that appeared to be a magnet.

“Yes, actually...” Sango sighed. “It took you long enough.”

“Yes, but it looks like I came in at the right moment. Somebody was thinking about going at the TV with a magnet.”

Sango blanched. “Oh...” She remembered when Kohaku had done that when he had been around Shippou’s age, with their parents’ brand new television. Their father had not been very happy, at all.

Shippou,” Miroku said, looking down at the five-year-old, “I think you owe Sango an apology, and then I think you need to go sit on your bed and have a time-out for a while. No toys or books.”

Hesitantly, Shippou nodded. “I’m sorry, Miss Sango.” Miroku gave him a nudge, and he quickly toddled off to his room. As soon as he was gone, Sango ran a hand across her face and collapsed onto the couch.

“That kid is crazy...” she muttered, closing her eyes as she leaned her head back.

“Nah,” Miroku laughed, taking a seat beside her, “just hyper.”

“And uncontrollable.”

He chuckled again, discreetly slipping his arm around her shoulder, giving himself a mental high-five when she shifted a bit closer to him. “Maybe, but that’s normal for kids. Separate them from their parents for a while, and they’ll take advantage of every opportunity to wreak havoc that’s provided them. The goal is to stay one step ahead of their crafty little minds.”

“I guess I need a lot of practice, then,” Sango said, cracking an eye open at him.

Miroku was about to say something else when he was rudely interrupted by Shippou calling out, “Can I come out of time-out yet?”

He smirked. “Ladies first.”

Sango groaned. “I hate you.”

“That’s just your way of saying that you can’t live without me,” he teased.

She gave a derisive snort, finally getting up. “Come on. We’ve got a kid to entertain.”

“Eh heh... Right behind you.”

-

“Goodbye y’guys! Thanks for playing with me!” Shippou quipped with a wave as he disappeared into the limo. Miroku and Sango waved back, almost halfheartedly, as the vehicle pulled away. And, once it was out of sight, the two couldn’t help but share a smile of relief.

“Glad that’s over,” Sango intoned through a yawn as they meandered their way back to the mansion. She took a moment to look at her watch. “It’s only six, and I’m practically exhausted. I have to admit, though, having to go through watching Shippou, I suddenly have a newfound respect for my parents.”

“Yeah...” Miroku said as he followed her into the house. Sango blinked, glancing at him in surprise. He sounded... really distracted.

“Are you okay?” she inquired, a little bit confused. Just a few minutes ago, he’d been as outgoing and pleasant as usual. He gave her an assuring smile.

“Don’t worry about it. Just thought of something, that’s all. That, and I haven’t visited the Confessional today.” The ‘Confessional’ was the name they had dubbed the video-journal room, although it was much more comfortable than an actual confessional... Even though it was still about the size of a closet. At least, it was a big closet, though.

“All right. I’m headed upstairs then.”

He grinned at her. “I can’t wait to join you.”

“I’ll bet...” Sango mumbled, scowling at him, though inside she was laughing. As they parted ways, she couldn’t help but realize just how much she was starting to like Miroku. It was strange. Even though she wanted to throttle him sometimes— such as when he couldn’t keep his hands to himself— she found herself enjoying his company more and more. And what was more, she didn’t even care that they shared a bed anymore, and this was only the fifth day since she’d met him!

I must be going insane,’ Sango thought as she went through the routine of changing into her pajamas and brushing out her hair. ‘I’ve never been this comfortable with a guy before, and here I am living with one I barely know. It figures... God, I hope I don’t have a crush on him, or something silly like that.’

But, now that the thought crossed her mind, it dawned on her that since she was thinking like that, it was extremely likely that she did have a crush on him.

I’m doomed,’ she admitted to herself as she loaded toothpaste onto her toothbrush.

“You know, I really ought to steal that from you.”

Sango started, almost dropping the toothbrush into the sink. She could see herself begin to blush furiously in the mirror as she recovered it, glancing towards Miroku. He just had to choose the exact moment she’d figured exactly what was wrong with her to walk on in, didn’t he?

“Steal what?”

“Your toothbrush. You kicked me to the couch the other day, thereby ending our truce. Therefore, I suggest you hand it over, young lady.”

“That would defeat the whole ‘stealing’ part, Miroku.” She frowned, tilting her head to look behind him. “What? No cameras?” she noted, before popping her toothbrush into her mouth.

“They went home early, I guess. And you’re right. I’ll just have to bide my time,” Miroku concluded. He leaned against the counter, watching her reflection for a moment. “Hey, Sango?”

Mmm?” She glanced at him in the mirror.

“About the cameras... Call me crazy, but I just had an idea.”

Sango leaned down to spit the toothpaste from her mouth, and then rinsed with a cup of water. “What sort of idea?”

“What if we messed with the cameras?”

She turned off the water, turning to look at him directly. “Explain.”

“Well, the entire point of this show is to figure out whether or not we’re attracted to each other, and how much so, right? So, why don’t we take advantage of that, and say... Pretend that our relationship is different than it is.”

“Different? What sort of different?”

Miroku hesitated. The look she was giving him was somewhat unsettling, but he plowed ahead nevertheless. “Like... More intimate. Can you imagine the shock on everyone’s faces when we suddenly kiss out of nowhere, or if it looks like we’re in a fight... and they have no clue why? I mean, I know you’re not the sort of girl who would usually go for this sort of thing, but—”

“Okay.”

Miroku blinked. “What?”

“I said, ‘okay,’” Sango repeated, forcing herself to keep her voice steady. Her stomach was doing flip-flops, and her face strangely hot. She had no clue as to why she was agreeing to this! Miroku was right, it was unlike her. But, as she’d made note of earlier, this entire situation was completely unlike her as well. Why not go the extra mile?

“Seriously?”

“Yes, on one condition.”

Miroku nodded, somewhat numbly. He’d thought he’d have to spend at least an hour trying to convince Sango to do this... And she’d just agreed to it, straight off! “Name it.”

“You don’t push anything. If I’m not comfortable with it, you stop right away. And, we’re not going to have sex, so don’t even make a play for it, all right?”

“Fair enough, I suppose,” Miroku said. “What the lady wants, the lady gets. So, how shall we seal this deal?” He moved closer to her, a playful light in his eyes, brightened by his success.

Sango reached up and tweaked his nose. “There is no seal, as it’s not a deal. It’s a plan, so I suggest you exercise some patience Miroku. You’re not getting anything until there are some cameras to catch it on film.”

“And why is that?” Miroku prompted, catching her hand loosely.

She slipped it out of his grasp and smiled. “Because you haven’t brushed your teeth yet, and I’m tired, silly.” Giving him once last grin, she slipped around him and headed out of the bathroom before he could say another word.

Things were about to get interesting.

-

Aamalie: Muah ha. Yes. Interesting, indeed. But wow... That reminds me. I need to plan a few more chapters. Oy...

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Fledgling- Ah... I see. D/H... v.v God, sorry, but that’s one of the stupidest pairings ever. I’m constantly getting on my friend’s case for reading that stuff. But, whatever. Yeah... There aren’t many reality tv fics in this section, otherwise I wouldn’t have written this. xD

Sam Sam-aka-Sam- Who says she’s going to be able to resist him-wink-

Starzki- Eh. No, she doesn’t get arrested. Least, I don’t think she does... -ideas- Hmm. But she gets much less violent from now on. Trust me. And, oh look! Hot tub next chapter! Hmm...

Stipe- I think ‘annoying’ might be an understatement when it comes to Shippou.

Inu Kaiba- LoL. Don’t worry, no matter how annoyed I get, I won’t hold off updates if I can help it. It’s only when my schedule goes unexpectedly haywire (like it did last week) that it takes me forever to update.

Chocolatechipp- Hee. xD Thanks!

Newbie GK- ...You’re not allowed to know that yet.

Fantastical Queen Ebony Black- ...Yeah. Lots of reviews. I love them. And I don’t think it will be as repetitive from now on. Hopefully. It’s hard to mix it up a lot, thanks to the setting. -shrugs- We’ll see.

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Leave me a review if you luffle me. -wink-

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