Mr Perfect – Part Four: Wench

"Shippou get over here!"

"Eeeep!" The small boy squeaked, locking the door and leaning against it. All the commotion had snapped the girls attention to the hallway.

"Kagome!" Shippou cried, running into her arms. "Hi Sango."

"Hey Shippou, you never told us you played with fiendish" Sango said, after giving him a hug.

"You never asked."

"Shippou! Open the door you little runt! And give me back my soda!"

"No!" He yelled, burying his head into Kagome's stomach.

"I warned you! Miroku! Gimme your drum sticks!"

"Gimme gimme never gets."

"NOW!"

"But they're my babies!"

"Don't gimme 'em and you won't be able to produce babies!"

. . .

After a few moments of silence, Sango, Shippou, and Kagome could hear a pounding noise against one of the locks. Not long after, the tip of a drumstick popped in... I wonder who won that argument. Anyway, after a few seconds of prodding the hold larger, the three saw a muscular hand pop through the hold and unlock the handle's lock.

"Are they always this violent?" Kagome asked, looking down at the boy on her lap.

"Not all of them, just Inuyasha. It's Miroku you should look out for though." Shippou told them, watching the door handle jiggle.

"Why?"

"Because he's a-"

"Gotcha you little brat!" Inuyasha proclaimed, throwing open the door and cutting off whatever Shippou was going to say in the process.

"Where are you ya-" Inuyasha stopped mid-threat and stood staring at the two girls, who in return, stared back.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Who the hell are we? Who The Hell Are We?!" Kagome yelled, jumping to her feet. Shippou fell to the floor with a 'thump' as Kagome stomped up to the man in red until she stood face to face with him... Well... Face to neck, seeing that he was a tad bit taller then her. Not one to be yelled at, Kagome looked up to his face, her flaming aura... Uh... Flaming behind her.

"I'd tell you who we are but I'm not too sure if I want such an arrogant ninny to know!"

"Arrogant Ninny?! Listen Wench-"

"WENCH?!"

"Yeah, that's right! Wench! Where do you get off yelling at me?! Do you know who I am?" Inuyasha yelled.

"Yes I know who you are! Right now I don't care though! Where do you get off threatening a poor little sweetie like Shippou here?!"

Taking one look at Shippou (who was still drinking his soda and had managed to stick his tongue out at him) and back to the 'wench' he growled. "Sweetie? Helpless? I'll see how helpless he is!" Inuyasha growled, advancing on the boy until a 'thunk' on his head made him go 'plunk'. Kagome stood glaring with a guitar case hanging over her shoulder.

"Go Kagome!" Shippou cheered, throwing the now empty can away.

"You sure you didn't kill him?" Sango asked, prodding the motionless body with her finger.

"If I did it serves him right. Dare to call me a wench" She huffed, leaning on the case.

"Did you know that technically, Wench only means a carefree young woman?"

. . .

"...It was in which the way he said it..." Kagome decided, nodding then turning her head back to the door when another guy came into the room.

"Why hello, who are you?" The man with a long ponytail (A/N: Oh I wonder who that could be....) Asked, not bothering to glance at Inuyasha on the floor at one of the girls feet.

"This is Sango and that's Kagome." Shippou introduced, hopping over to the snacks. (A/N: has anyone noticed he never walks?)

"Count to ten Inuyasha before you- oh my.." A new appearance said, coming to stand behind the other, "What did he do now?"

"He was going to kill Shippou" Kagome shrugged, poking the body with her foot.

"Ah, Kagome." The first man sighed, dreamily, walking up to her, "I am Kouga. Please excuse my band mates rudeness."

"Oh, it's all right." She smiled, nervously, not missing how close he had moved in.

"And one more thing?"

"Yes?"

"You are strong my dear Kagome. Please... Be my woman!" Kouga exclaimed, taking her hands in his. Considering that Kagome's hands were holding the guitar case up, it was now standing on it own. However, the unfair laws of physics would not allow such an event to take place so! Down fell the case... Right onto poor Inuyasha's unconscious head, which now wasn't so unconscious any more.

"Oww... He moaned, rubbing his now abused head.

"Wait, Kagome and Sango?" Miroku asked, walking up to Sango.

"Yes, that's right..." She said, watching him.

"Hmmm....." He muttered, stroking his chin and walking in a circle around Sango.

" 'Hmmm' What?"

"Well... You don't look old... Are you?"

"Old?! I'm barely 21!"

"And you don't seem to have any gray hairs. Do you dye your hair?"

"No, does it look like it?!" Sango asked, holding her hair up to her eyes.

"Hmm..."

"Hmm what?!" Sango all but screamed. At first, she was a bit self-conscious as he looked her over... Now she was just annoyed.

"You don't sag, so you can't be too old."

"Sag?! Sag where-" Sango flushed red and crossed her arms across her chest. He was going a little too far now...

"And look at this! A nice butt! Oooooh, firm too!"

"AH! You PERVERT!" Sango screamed, feeling his hand grasp her backside. So this is what Rin meant with 'keep your backsides away from Miroku...' Grabbing the nearest object, which happened to be a vase, she hit it over the drummers head. Breathing deeply, she stepped over the twitching Miroku and took a seat next to Shippou.

"And you call me violent..." Kagome muttered.

"He touched me!"

"Oi! What the hell are you doin Kouga?" Inuyasha yelled from his place under the band mate's feet.

"Talking to my woman."

"Your woman?"

"Hold on a minute! I never said I was your woman!"

"Of course you did!"

"WHEN!?"

Watching the argument between the three, Sango failed to notice the hand slowly creeping it's way closer to her. That is, until she felt it on her butt once more. The sound of the slap haltered the argument for a moment until Inuyasha noticed that 1) Kouga still wasn't off him, and 2) He was grasping the red Kagome's hands pretty tight.

"What the hell?!"

"What? You don't even know her name dogturd!"

"She wouldn't tell me! Wait... DOGTURD?!"

"You called me a wench!"

"You called my woman a wench?!"

"She/I is/am not your woman!" Inuyasha and Kagome yelled, starting the whole argument up again. Shippou sighed and got up.

"I'm gonna go find Miss. Rin and Sesshomaru." He said, though he doubted that anyone heard him anyway, and left the room.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Oh no! Not so hard!"

"Come now Rin, We've done this before."

"Oh, but you're just so.... Big"

"Get used to it."

"Please go easy on me..."

"I always do."

"Not last time!"

"You know you liked it."

. . .

"...Yeah.... Oh! You're so fluffy!"

"...Fluffy?"

"Mmmhmmm.. I think that'll be my nickname for you. Ohohohohohoho!"

"....Fluffy?"

"Oh stop complaining and let's do this!"

A small crowd had gathered outside of the room by now, all betting on what the two were talking about. Most of the listeners faces were bright red and they kept muttering about how wrong it was to eavesdrop... That didn't stop them though.

"'scuse me!" Excuse me! Where are Rin and Sesshoumaru?" Shippou asked. All hands pointed to the door and the crowd cleared away, ashamed at being caught... And by a kid no less! Shippou shrugged, Adults could be so weird at times. He knocked on the door twice, receiving no answer either times he saw that the door was unlocked. He simply pushed it open and stared in horror at the scene before him.

Sesshoumaru had a lollipop in his mouth and was leaning foreword while holding the controller, almost crying.

"I won!" Rin cheered, jumping up and down. "Oh, hey Shippou. Wanna play Tekken?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What did you think they were doing? O.o... Perverts. Anyway! >.o sorry that took so long. I would have posted it early today but I slept over at my friend Katya's house and stayed until after dinner. V.v *sigh*......school.... But i'm staying up to watch Inuyasha tonight XD FULL DEMON TIME! BWUAHAHAHAHHAAHAHA he kills people o.o fun........ Anyway! Ja!