The Changing Of Friendship

Friends. 

That’s how it all began. Nothing could take that away from her.

She sat alone, wondering what had happened. Searching through the depths of her mind, nothing could answer her question of misunderstanding.

It seemed as though it were yesterday they had just met. Nothing out of the ordinary made their acquaintance turn to friendship. Never once would there be a sad face around each other. Only the happiness that seemed to radiate.

Confiding in secrets promised to never say a word, were exchanged. Til this day she never once said a thing to reveal his deep dark secret of the past. True to her word, she believed in him, for he had doubted himself.

People around her always tried to give her a push to go a step forward with him. She would only laugh and shake her head. Never would she want to ruin the great friendship she already had. It may have seemed stupid, but she felt this guy was different. Never once did she feel ashamed, nervous, or scared. He had brought out something she never knew she had. Confidence. Grateful couldn’t even describe her friendship with him.

Days turned to weeks, as weeks turned into months and soon years. Never once were unfriendly words exchanged.

Everyone thought of what they could’ve been. They were just too blind to see it.

She, however, one day took it into consideration if their friendship could have blossomed into something more. Even though their friendship continued to soar, she would have more and more daydreams that would haunt her. Where did all these feelings come from and why did she want this so bad?

It never occurred to her until then that his sincerity, playfulness, and innocence could overwhelm her.

But she wasn’t going to ruin something as great as she had.

Voiced out good byes turned into hugs as well as kisses on the cheek. Everyone thought it was cute. But it was normal for everyone to do that. Why did people notice whenever they did it? It never occurred to them that soon enough, it would all come to an end.

It wasn’t until that fateful day, everything had changed.

It seemed like any other friendly outing. Another good friend even decided to tag along. Everything seemed as perfect as any other day could be.

Good byes were said and it was just the two of them. Common sense told her to have him come to her house, being since it was only a block away.

The usual talks about anything in particular lasted them that short walk.

Rain decided to become part of the forecast. It was too beautiful to stay inside. Under the porch, water, sparkling in the evening sun dripped through the trees.

She put on the radio to soothe the quietness that had come upon them.

Soon it was time for him to leave as his ride had found her house.

Deciding to be daring, she pulled him into a hug and she herself initiated that kiss on the cheek. He had always been the one to do it, so now it was her turn. It looked liked he didn’t mind. Smiling behind, she whispered good bye. He repeated them back to her as he turned to leave her forever.

Had the people in the car seen it and decided to make a big deal? Did they think the 2 were closer than they actually were? She would never find out what happened.

Only a couple days later, their conversations dwindled to just “hi” and “good bye”. She never noticed it, figuring they would have better talks later on.

Oh how wrong she could be.

Days, turned into weeks, as weeks turned into months.

By now, their conversations had stopped permanently.

Even when she would smile or even look at him, his face would turn the other way. When her name was brought up in his presence, he would automatically change the subject.

Somehow, this time, no one seemed to notice. The world didn’t seem as bright as it was before. For 2 rays of sunshine had slowly faded away.

She would often catch herself thinking of what she had done wrong. Many a time would she prepare a word or 2 to ask of him. But her stubbornness seemed to kick in.

Why would she ask for his forgiveness if she didn’t know what the problem was?

She only wanted his friendship back. Nothing more.

Finally, someone had taken notice to the questionable behavior of the two. A good friend of hers was even closer to him. Years before she had came into the picture had they known each other.

It seemed like their friendship dwindled as well. He even threatened on never talking to her again if she continued to talk to that thing he used to know.

Now he had lost another friend. She would never understand his childish behavior.

Every time the 2 girls got together, they were basically inseparable. She would continue to apologize to her friend but she wouldn’t hear of it. They would turn the other cheek or walk away when his presence entered their own world.

Many times would she explain that fateful night to her friend. Both would try to understand this awkward situation.

With no luck in their hands, they put him aside and continued on.

But every now and then she still wonders.

As she sits alone, she dreams of having him back. To see his smile, hear his laugh, and to just be happy around him.

Now, it’s just a feeling of awkwardness and nervousness when they are around each other. His eyes reveal it all. Those cold, emotionless eyes haunt her in her sleep.

But what surprises her most of all is that all of this is brought onto her. As she watches from afar, he seems normal around everyone else. The same person she was friends with just months before. When she steps into the picture, however, the whole atmosphere changes.

Whatever happened between them, she will always ponder. On the outside, she’s a happy independent woman, waiting for her prince to come. But on the inside, longing of that one special person bears deep in her heart.

Regret of whatever she did keeps nagging at her. But her mind keeps saying she has done nothing wrong. It is him that is losing something so great.

Her friend just smiles and tells her not to worry. One day something may spark a change. Keep on going. The world is forever.

She takes those words to heart. Trying to believe her friend. She imagines everything back as it was.

But only time will tell if her dream can soon become her reality.