JOB: Bassist for Ska band Rocket From The Crypt
DESCRIPTION: We've finally found conclusive evidence that Mr. T indeed used to be a member of Rocket From The Crypt. The band have finally admitted it too.
"OK, OK, he was in the band," says lead singer/guitarist John "Speedo" Reis. "But not for very long. He was putting intense pressure on us. INSANE pressure. He convinced us to BURN all the copies of Scream Dracula Scream (Editor's note - good album) and re-issue them with the re-worked songs like "In A Van" as opposed to "On A Rope". I mean, c'mon, that doesn't even make sense! The lyrics went "In a van, in a van, got me hanging in a van". THAT DOESN'T WORK. On A Rope was much better. But when I said so, Mr. T actually drove all the way over to Seattle, picked up Courtney Love, brought her back, slapped me round the face with her, then threw her back to Seattle. HELLUVA far."
The new album "Live From Camp X-Ray" has a legal promise stuck to the cover stating how the album is "T-Free." Courtney Love is still missing presumed thrown.
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