JOB: Singer for artsy band R.E.M
DESCRIPTION: Michael Stipe, lead singer of R.E.M (famous for "Imitation of Life" and "Everybody Hurts") has worked with everyone, from Kurt Cobain to Eric Clapton. But the poetic Stipe now has his sights set on Mr. T.
"We've got the market pretty much cornered when it comes to depressing intellectual music," says Stipe. "Everybody cries, though, don't they? That gives me an idea... anyway, Mr. T has so much to add to the music business. I mean, look who he's worked with. Rocket From The Crypt, the Beatles, Nirvana, The Foo Fighters, Slipknot, Weezer... Weezer wouldn't work with ME. They said that they had Fonzie over for tea. Mr. T is a real inspiration."
R.E.M, since hiring Mr. T have released the slightly off-track songs "Crying is for Suckas", "I Pity the Gentle Lily" and "Good God, Michael Stipe is more sensitive than a Newborn". Michael Stipe claims to be in a depression clinic, where Reveal was recorded.
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