JOB: Graduate
DESCRIPTION: Not many people know this, but in the words of Deftones, he's back in school - only this time, he doesn't have a football scholarship.
"We enlisted Mr. T for pupil-relations," speaks the dean on Syracuse U, Phineas Barnaby. "Like a snitch. Or, to put it more eloquantly, like Peter Griffin in that episode of Family Guy where the kids were on drugs. We need Mr. T to scan the halls, looking for uncouth youngsters to be pitied."
So far, Mr. T has had nothing to report back, but he is suspected to be the one who drove his unmarked van through the wall of the canteen, and who put Hannibal's leather gloves in the hairdryers, making them un-usable and smelly. "like turds," claims Mr. Barnaby.
Like turds indeed.
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