Mike Chat

 

Moderator:      Thanks for tuning in to the Mike Lowe chat for this week.  Unfortunately, Mike can’t be here again this week, so your questions will be answered by his personal assistant, Maurice.

 

Maurice:          It is absolutely fabulous to be with you today.  Mike is dreadfully sorry that he can’t make it, but he had to be in Geneva to pick up an international humanitarian award for the work he does with limbless children.

 

Moderator:      Understandable.  Well, we have a lot of great questions, so let’s get started.

 

Mikerulz:        Hey! Thanks for taking my question!  What does Mike have for breakfast?

 

Maurice:          Mike loves grapefruit.  He eats five or six grapefruits every morning.  I swear.

 

LuvMike:        First time writer, long time reader!  How does Mike juggle his busy schedule?

 

Maurice:          Well, he has a personal staff of twelve, who take care of basic tasks like paying bills, responding to fan correspondence, washing him, helping him practice Tae Bo, and procuring grapefruits.

 

Mikerox:         I’m limbless.  How can I get in touch with Mike for assistance?

 

Maurice:          Sorry, kid.  That was last year’s cause.

 

MikeGroupie:  Has Mike been complaining of itching or swelling recently?

 

Maurice:          Actually, he has. . . um, why don’t we discuss this off-line.

 

Mike’sMom:  How come Mike doesn’t eat?  He’s skin and bones!  And why doesn’t he become a doctor?  That is an honorable profession!  And he should go out with that Rosenthal girl – her Mom says she’s very cute.  And tell him to call home once in a while!

 

Maurice:          OK!  Stop it!  God!  Can’t he do anything right?

 

Moderator:      Why don’t we take one more question.

 

MikzGirl:         What is Mike doing to assist the war on terrorism?

 

Maurice:          In order to reduce our dependence on foreign oil, Mike has switched to only non-petroleum based hair products.  The man never fails to inspire me.

 

Moderator:      Well, that’s all the time we have.  Please come back next week for another Mike Chat!

 

MikeisKing:    Stay Golden Mikey Boy!

 

LikeMike:       I wanna be Like Mike!

 

Mikeystyle:     Love you, man.  Keep on keepin’ it real.