A COSMIC ATTEMPT ON A BARGAIN

BASEMENT BUDGET

A movie review by Mike Norton

� � � � � �One of the benefits of a comics convention is the exposure to many aspects of the industry one isn't going to see by merely waiting at the shelves of one's local comic shop. Sometimes these glimpses aren't strictly legal, but that can sometimes make them even more intriguing. For me and my time at the 1994 Chicago ComiCon, it was a chance to see the never-officially-released movie, The Fantastic Four.

� � � � � ��While officially never released, Marvel's presence at the 1994 Con was marked by their large display, yet within 50 yards of it were at least three video dealers who were selling copies of the film for between $20-$25 each. Moreover, each of these dealers had a copy of the film running on one of their screens nearly the entire con One could hardly be there and miss it.

� � � � � � Before I continue, however, I want to give you the obligatory spoiler warning, since I'm going to discuss specific elements and scenes. If you want to preserve the mystery at this late date, move on to another feature.

� � � � � � German producer Bernd Eichinger and his Neue Constantin Films, which purchased the movie rights from Marvel, sublicensed the rights to producer and B-movie king Corman in 1992. Shortly after the film was completed, Eichinger paid Roger Corman $1 million to repossess the rights. The $2 million version was shelved so that 20th Century Fox and Home Alone director Chris Columbus could make a flashier $50 million-plus version with celebrity actors... a plan that eventually fell apart.

� � � � � �By this time many of you may have already spoken to people who saw the film, as I did prior to seeing it, so I'll start there with the standard criticisms I've heard.

� � � � � �First: "It's so dark." Well... I don't think this is a particularly fair criticism, since just about anyone in fandom who's seen it has seen an obvious bootleg copy. There has never been, to the best of my knowledge, an official release of this one after all. Due to the less-than-ideal conditions most film-to-video bootlegs this is pretty much a standard problem. Just talk to those folks who had bootlegs of ET years back when it was officially "never to be released on video." While it may be dark, I'd like to see an original print before damning the filmmakers for what's most likely a minor, bitter wage of the sin of bootlegging.

� � � � � Second: "The Thing's costume... it's terrible! You can see the zipper!" Well, almost and no. Given the budget and tech available, I think they did rather well. The facial expressions - primarily mouth movements - are actually fairly well done. The lumpy texture is a good approximation of his original transformation, save for the somewhat prognathic jaw, which was technically necessary to facilitate the mouth movements and artificial teeth of the mechanism. As for the supposedly evident "zipper", the reference is obviously to the deep, dark crease running from sternum through the navel and disappearing into his trunks. I would suggest a trip to a local zoo, nature center, or a good photographic book on the subject of animals with exo-skeletal plates. The creases would naturally be there as points of flexure to enable him to move. For proof of how well they actually did it, in the final scene the Thing walks right up to the camera, the lens fading to darkness as his belly covers it. Even at that range there's no appallingly evident zipper.

� � � � � Third: "Doctor Doom's costume is terrible. The mask looks like plastic." Well, it certainly has its problems. Their decision to make it one, unmoving piece is probably the focus of criticism, since in that respect it reminds most of us of mass-manufactured Halloween masks. While they probably should have worked on putting some motion into the mouthpiece, keep in mind that they could have gone too far the other way, and we would have had a mask which flexed to show expression. Then what would the over-anxious critics have said? "It was a rubber mask!"

� � � � � The filmmakers had an uphill battle trying to translate the drama of Dr. Doom onto the screen. Aside from adding mouth movements, which might have prevented Doom's attempts as emoting from looking like those of a villain from a Japanese adventure show, perhaps they should have bulked up the armor somewhat, padding/extending the shoulders. By bulking the rest of him up, the big, thick armored gloves wouldn't appear so ponderous. The director attempted to attain/maintain the drama by keeping the shots on him close-up early on, but as soon as we see full-body shots, and have a chance to note how small the over-all effect makes him appear, the drama evaporates.

� � � � � �Fourth, and most prominent: "It's bad, It's really, really bad. Worse than Captain America was." I have to disagree. The F.F. themselves, Doctor Doom and Alicia, are generally nicely pulled off in terms of their characterization, providing one makes the necessary allowances fr this being a film version.

� � � � � �Certainly, though, the powers are often handled poorly.

� � � � � �Reed's powers are only seen as extensions of arms and legs, and the only time they're handled reasonably well is during a climactic fight scene atop Doom's castle when the effect was handled using animation and a bit of distance and drama lent it by a bird's eye view. The worst example is in the closing scene of the film, where Reed's arm extends from the open sun roof of his wedding limo. It looks, as our own Darren Madigan noted, "like a slinky" inside a long sleeve with a stuffed glove at the end as it waved a mechanical farewell.

� � � � � Sue's powers were misleadingly used, as she repeatedly seemed to disappear not only from sight but in substance, as she would vanish just as two henchmen were about to grab her or riddle her with bullets, only to have in cartoon-like fashion, the baddies run into/gun down each other. In theory she could vanish and then duck, and we do see her rising from a crouched position as she becomes visible, but it seems unlikely unless she's also developed super-speed.

� � � � � In the case of the Human Torch, I have mixed feelings. They plainly put some time, money and effort into it. Giving them the benefit of the doubt, they seem to have decided that his "flame" should be more of a plasma - a super-heated gas composed of charged particles - than a true flame. The result is that when he completely "flames on" and takes off (something he doesn't do until the climactic scenes) he appears to be more of a red-tinged Silver Surfer, with a gassy field effect around him, than a fiery Human Torch. Of course, they lose most of my sympathy when in that same scene they have him out-race a laser beam, and then use his powers to first block and then force it back.

� � � � � Aside from that, they generally did a good job of making the characters work. The origins for both Dr. Doom and the F.F., certainly pivotal aspects, were handled nicely. The rewrites, tying both events to the ten-year occurance of a radioactive comet, Colossus, and having Reed and Victor start out as friends in joint scientific pursuit of that powerful heavenly phenomena, are perfectly reasonable, elegant decisions. The initial failure, a result of Doom's miscalculation - an expression of his passionate, impetuous character, as opposed to Reed's more strictly scientific attitudes - results in Doom's disfigurement and seeming death, as their ground-based equipment is overwhelmed by Colossus' nearly unimaginable energy. Ten years later, Reed has a ship ready, having decided against trying to channel the comet's enormous energy down to Earth.

� � � � � Small, pleasant touches abound, such as Mrs. Storm's romantically dubbing them "The Fantastic Four" just before they head off to prepare for their flight. Likewise, Victor's bare self-restraint when Reed warns him that his calculations are in error, and the way he kisses some object he is wearing around his neck just before that ill-fated first attempt at tapping the comet's power, demonstrates the elements of superstition which underlie his character, in contrast to Reed's.

� � � � � Of the F.F. members, problems arise at times with Alex Hyde-White's interpretation of Reed Richards. The identifying, harshly grey-white temples seem to vary in intensity between scenes, and can make him a little difficult to take at times. He generally avoids striking poses, but there's one moment, when the team meets Dr. Doom, where Reed hops down off a platform to stand with his teammates, placing fists on hips as he bounces to a stop. At that moment he may as well be Jim Carrey.

� � � � � The film includes a version of the Mole Man, to which I have mixed reactions. On the one hand, they kept him as a social outcast-due-to-appearance, and replaced his subterranean minions with other social outcasts, which certainly makes some sense. However, they could have done with being less influenced by DeVito's filthy and unsavory version of The Penguin from Batman Returns. (Granted, he's more of a Fagan character, but you get the idea.)

� � � � � Henchmen, both Doom's two principle (aside from his many, hooded) ones, and the tattered, smelly minions of the unnamed Mole Man were kept primarily as comic relief. Much as with similar light elements in the classic Peter and the Wolf, they are often accompanied by a bassoon in the musical score. I could have done with fewer such "touches", but at least this helped fulfill the director's seeming need for such things without having to unduly compromise our heroes and villain.

� � � � � Still, with a better budget, a more well-informed technical consultant, and perhaps some tighter direction, this could have been a first-rate adventure film. Though those may sound like rather sweeping indictments, they're mainly matters of degrees. Unlike most of the earlier comics-to-film projects Marvel's been involved with, mostly sensible changes were made in the origin tale, rather than the gratuitous ones made so often in those others. I only hope that if the proposed big budget version is eventually made that they remember the many things which were right with this film.

� � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � � MJN