"They might be back in style," Donna said dryly, "Scooby Doo lunch boxes are back."
They both laughed as Laurie pulled her mitten string and tucked the mittens under her hands. Donna and Gina were best friends, and the fact that Gina's cousin was tagging along was irratating to both of them.
"My mother made them," Laurie said as she stared out the window looking dejected. The L train stopped at an underground station and the last person in their car got off.
"I'm sorry Laurie, we were just joking around." Gina knew she shouldn't make fun of her cousin but Laurie was such an easy target. She was from rural Nebraska and although she had lived in Chicago for three years, she just didn't seem to fit in. Laurie was just so prissy. Under her blue wool overcoat she wore a white blouse that tied in a big floppy bow under her chin, and black flared dress pants that made her look like a church secretary if not a nun. The brown lace up boots and tan stockings completed the circa 1969 ensemble. She looked out of place anywhere, but tonight, they had just come from an Eminem concert at United Center, where Laurie had spent three hours standing with her hands over her ears.
The train lurched forward and started up the Ravenswood line toward Evanston. Even though the seats were empty, Gina and Donna stood up, holding the overhead hand loops for balance. Donna lit a cigarette and blew the smoke toward the "No Smoking" sign over the door. It was near midnight and there was no one around to object, except Laurie, who gave her a disapproving scowl.
Donna ignored her and relived each detail of the concert with Gina.
"What do you think was the best part of the concert?" Donna asked.
Gina smiled. "The part where your boot fell over the rail and beaned that pothead guy!" she said and started to laugh.
"Real funny," Donna snorted, "and it didn't exactly fall now did it?" she snarled and gave Gina a slight jostle.
Gina was still laughing. "O.K. I might have nudged it by accident."
Earlier in the evening, they had just settled into their seats in the first row of the mezzanine level, delighted with the unobstructed view because the row in front of them was thirty feet below. Gina couldn't help but notice when Donna had covertly slipped her boot off under her seat and started adjusting her stocking. She was still fishing around for her boot with her stockinged foot just as the band came on stage. The entire stadium had stood up at once and screamed, except for Donna, who hurriedly tried to wriggle her white stockinged foot back into her boot. After several moments without success, she had relented and stood up next to Gina, her boot still half on and half off, as she held onto the railing for balance and joined in with the crowd.
When Gina had glanced downward again, she saw that Donna was still struggling to work her foot into the ankle high boot without much progress and at some point, the target became too irresistable. Gina glanced down again just as Donna pushed the boot up against the curb so that the toe stuck out from under the railing. Her foot was half in at best. Looking away from Donna and toward the stage, Gina kicked the heel of the boot, a mere tap really, but it was enough to send it plummeting over the curb and through the railing.
Donna gasped as it clunked squarely on the head of a tough looking guy down below, then fell behind his chair. Gina heard her yell something but pretended not to notice anything was wrong. She could barely suppress a fit of laughter as the guy below them looked around angrily for his hidden tormentor.
Donna had spent three long hours not only missing one boot, but also worrying that someone would find it and take it. It was an embarrassing situation, but there was no way she was going to ask that guy if she could retrieve it from under his chair, he was just too creepy. At the end of the show, they had waited for most of the people to leave. Finally, Donna was forced to scamper down the concrete steps with one stockinged foot, all the way to the main floor to retrieve her wayward boot. She had padded a few hundred steps at most, but her thin white sock was blackened by the time she found her boot and put it back on.
"You did that on purpose," Donna said, as the Division Street station was left behind by the L train.
Gina just smiled, but wouldn't admit a thing.
"You just love to embarrass me in front of her," Donna persisted, glaring at Laurie.
"Why on earth would you ever have your boot off in the first place?" Laurie asked, turning away from the window and meeting her stare, "That place was filthy."
"They're a half size too big, and besides, my sock was getting all turned around...but they're Italian and they were on sale..." Donna dropped her cigarette on the floor and squashed it out with the pointy toe of the boot.
"Dammit!" she said, grabbing the heel of the boot and yanking it off to examine it closely. "It must have gotten scratched when it fell," she whined as she licked her thumb and rubbed vigorously at the scuff. Her toes were clearly outlined by the thin white sock as they pressed on the black rubber mat in the aisle of the train car. She was not paying attention as the train made another stop and she momentarily lost her balance, pitching forward and fumbling the boot. It tumbled and landed next to the door just as it suddenly opened. Donna watched in horror as it came to rest inches from the edge, then quickly took several uneven steps to rescue her boot for the second time this evening.
"If you're not careful, your going to loose that smelly old thing again," said Laurie.
"They're brand new," Donna said tartly, falling into the seat next to Laurie to wrestle her foot into the boot once more. "Maybe I should get my mommy to knit me a mitten string like yours. It could go up my pant legs and tie my boots together," Donna said sharply, tugging at Laurie's mitten.
"It would be better than embarrassing yourself in front of a stadium full of people," Laurie said in a biting tone, "Or taking your shoes off on public transportation."
"Oh dear me! What ever could possibly be worse than taking your shoe off on the L train?" Donna asked, mocking her.
"I can't imagine," Laurie said, and turned back toward the window.
Donna looked up at Gina, then nodded toward Laurie's legs. Gina flashed a mischeivious grin and nodded back. "You won't have to imagine!" Donna said, descending on Laurie and straddling her leg. Gina joined in, grabbing Laurie's other boot and going to work on the laces.
"Stop it!" Laurie shrieked, kicking wildly as both boots were quickly untied. "If you take my boots off I'll kill you!" she snarled. "STOP!" She kicked and screamed, pounding her fists on the back of their jackets, but they continued to work at her boot laces.
Gina had unlaced the left boot down to the ankle, and was attempting to wrench it off Laurie's foot without success. Donna continued pulling at the lace of the other boot, pulling it completely free, holding it overhead like a trophy.
"Stop it!" Laurie cried. "Leave me alone!"
"I've got ten bucks says she's wearing Whinnie the Pooh socks!" Donna said, laughing as she pulled at the heel of the boot. "Gosh Laurie, taking your shoes off on public transportation, how tacky." She pulled the boot a little further as Laurie struggled to keep her foot inside. "I'm scared," Donna said, nudging Gina, "Maybe we shouldn't pull these off until the doors open, I bet they stink!" She pulled the boot another few inches, toying with her prey. "What do you think Laurie? Is it safe to pull off this clod hopper in a confined airspace?"
"Stop it," Laurie pleaded, "just leave me alone."
"I can't get this one loose," Gina said, giving Laurie's other boot a mighty tug. Suddenly, the boot came free and Gina tumbled into Donna, nearly knocking them both to the floor.
"Oh my god!" Donna chortled, she has on two different socks!"
Gina turned to see Laurie scrambling on her hands and knees in the aisle. On her left foot, she wore a navy blue trouser sock, the outline of her toes visible through the semi-sheer material. Her right foot was completely bare except for red nail polish that matched her fingernails, which were now digging into an empty white cable kneesock, tugging desperately on one end of the fabric while the heel of Donna's boot stood on the other end, pinning it to the floor.
"Get off my sock!" Laurie snarled.
"Your sock?" Donna asked in mock surprise, "This couldn't possibly be your sock, your other sock is blue." Donna stood over Laurie holding her laceless boot in one hand, twisting the lace around the fingers of her other hand. "Going barefoot on the train, I never knew you were such a hippy chick. Don't you watch the weather? There's snow on the ground outside."
"Gimme back my sock!" Laurie screamed, and rammed her shoulder into Donna, knocking her down into the seat.
Donna lept up and took a half step toward Laurie, but just then the door opened at the far end of the car and the conductor came in.
Laurie quickly snatched her sock and worked furiously to cover her naked foot with it as the man began to walk in their direction. "You are so busted!" Laurie sneered.
"Later," said Gina, and she turned toward the other end of the traincar. She dropped the boot at Laurie's feet. Donna followed quickly, dropping the other boot, but rolling up the lace in her coat pocket. They watched over their shoulders as Laurie quickly pushed her feet into the loose boots and stood up to talk with the train conductor.
"Does this train stop at Bryn Mawr?" Laurie asked the conductor, I didn't see any sign when we got on back there," she said, pointing in the direction the train had come from, but also pointing at Donna and Gina as they peered through the door of the next car, looking scared. She glared at them menacingly, knowing they couldn't hear her harmless conversation with the conductor, as he told her it did stop at Bryn Mawr. Let them think they're busted, she thought.
"Thank you," Laurie said, as he turned in the direction of Donna and Gina. The girls bolted, passing only a few people as they headed from car to car, but they quickly reached the last car and there was no where else to run. After a few tense moments, the conductor appeared and walked the length of the last car toward them. He was a surly looking man and his face gave no hint of humor or friendliness.
Donna tried to play it cool, but as he neared them, Gina blurted out, "That girl, she's my cousin, you know, and we were just messing around, and..."
"What girl?" he asked, seeming disinterested.
"The one you were talking to..."
Donna relaxed a bit. "You know, that girl in the farthest car, she was talking to you?"
"Yeah, yeah, she wanted to know about the Bryn Mawr stop..." he said.
"Whatever she said..." Gina stammered, still not catching on.
"None of my business," he said, "I'm just here to drive the train." He continued past them without another word.
"She was just playin' us," Donna said, "She didn't tell him Jack."
"She's had it," Gina said, breathing I sigh of relief.
They made their way back to the car where they had left Laurie, to see her seated, bent over and relacing one boot. It would have been much easier to lace if she took it off, but Laurie was reluctant to remove her boot again for any reason. She glared at them as they approached.
"Give me my boot lace," she demanded, adding, "that conductor said he would be coming right back."
"The conductor took the lace," Donna said, eyeing Gina.
"That's right," Gina agreed, "He said it might be used as a weapon, you know, could strangle somebody. New CTA rules or something..."
"Cut the crap!" Laurie said.
"No really," Donna began again, and nodded slightly to Gina, "In fact, he said we should have a look at that mitten string running through your coat sleeves."
Laurie sprung up quickly but it was too late, Gina descended on one sleeve as Donna grabbed the other. Laurie held her arms over her head, trying to save her mittens. It was the worst move she could have made.
"Don't take my mittens," Laurie said, "I told you, my mom made them."
"Why would we take your mittens?" Donna asked sweetly. She grabbed them and pushed on through the overhead ring that was a hand hold for standing passengers, and quickly tied them together, effectively pinning Laurie's arms over her head unless she could wriggle free of her jacket.
Instantly, Donna grabbed Laurie's pantleg, pulled her leg up and snatched the laceless boot off of her foot once more exposing Laurie's blue sock again. "Now where were we?" she said.
Gina dropped to her knees and began to slowly unlace the remaining boot as Laurie struggled in vain to free herself. "All that work to unlace these the first time, and now I have to start all over." Laurie kicked at her with her navy blue stockinged foot, but gave up after a few moments.
Gina noticed Laurie's stockinged foot perched next to the half-laced boot as she worked. Her toes were clear visible through the semi-sheer fabric, and Gina wondered why someone who always wore big ugly boots would have such an immaculate pedicure, particularly in the middle of winter.
She had unlaced all but the last few eyelets, when she gave the heel of the boot a tug. It was loose enough, but Laurie quickly shifted all of her weight in a last attempt to hold onto her boot. Gina leaned against her gently and Donna held her leg in the air.
Laurie had never been so angry. Her cousin Gina was usually so nice, but when she hung around with Donna, she was completely different. "Come on Gina, our stop is coming up. Untie my arms." In response, she felt her boot pulled halfway off of her heel. "Stop it!" she pleaded. She was working her arms loose in her coat sleeves, slinking down a litttle at a time. If she could pull her self free of her coat, she might be able to fight back at least. Her coat collar was at eye level already, and she was sure she could slide right out of her jacket, but she moved slowly because her blouse was riding up dangerously high. If she could just hold onto her boot for a few more minutes. Her head was already inside of her coat as she slinked lower. She had to get loose now because she couldn't even see anything. Donna said something, and she felt her boot come almost all the way off, pulling her sock down at the same time. She kicked again, trying to ward them off but the game was over. She heard a satisfying thunk as her boot connected to something solid, and she hoped it was Donna's head.
"That's going to cost you," She heard Donna say, as the boot was stripped away. She had nearly struggled to free when her sock was ripped off as well. The train was slowing to a stop and the doors opened. Laurie could see nothing but the dark inside of her jacket as she tried to slide free of it, and she felt a shocking blast of air on her exposed belly and naked toes as the winter air rushed in.
"Give me back my boots!" she screamed, her voice muffled inside her coat. She was on her knees now and her chin was almost to the hem of her jacket. She was nearly free of the coat but her shirt was riding up even further.
"I can see your bra Laurie," Gina taunted, "you better hope no one gets on at this stop."
"Or off," added Donna with a wicked laugh. She nodded to Gina and pointed to the open door.
"Yeah, come to think of it, we might want to get off this train..." Gina taunted.
Laurie's head popped out of her jacket just in time to see their legs moving toward to exit.
Donna whispered to Gina. "We'll just run out onto the platform, then back into the next car. She'll think we ditched her."
"It will serve her right," Gina agreed, "She's gonna freak," she said, laughing as they shuffled out onto the snow dusted platform.
Laurie finally jerked her arms free of her coat and stood up quickly. They had gone, taking her boots and one sock with them. She had to catch them, she thought, as she struggled to untie her coat before the doors shut. She got it free and dashed out the doors as they slid shut behind her. "Come on you two, this isn't funny anymore," she announced to the empty platform. She balanced on hher stockinged foot and brushed her bare toes against her pant leg, shaking off the snow.
"Oh No!" Gina screamed, pointing to the window, "she's out there on the platform!" Gina slid the window open as the train began to move.
"Laurie!"
She turned to where her name had been called to see her cousin looking stricken from inside the train. A boot flew out of the open window and skidded to a stop several yards from her feet. She quickly shuffled over to the boot and slid her naked foot into it, balancing her stockinged foot on top. She turned to see another boot fly out of the window, hitting the platform and skidding across the path of her footprints, before sliding to the edge and dropping out of sight.
Laurie stepped cautiously, only the toes of her stockinged foot touching the snowy platform, her laceless boot shuffling along next to her stocking clad toes. She looked over the edge of the elevated platform to see her boot resting right side up on the roof of a CTA bus as two puzzled pedestrians looked up at her.
She could do nothing but watch as the bus headed west, her empty boot riding off into the city.
Snowman
