DUN DUN DUN!! Whats gonna happen?!

 

 

Chapter 23 – I Could Never Get Mad At You

 

 

 

“Hailey, are you ok?” I heard someone say to me as there was knocking on the door.

I quickly wiped a tear from my eye. I’ve been in my room for the past half an hour crying to myself; the confusion was too much now. “I’m…I’m coming.” I opened the door and Maddie was on the other side.

“Oh my god…what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” I sniffled, “I’m just…”

“Aww you poor thing…” Maddie pulled a tissue out of her pocket and handed it to me.

I wiped away my tears and gestured for Maddie to come into my room. I closed and locked the door behind her.

“Hailey calm down…what’s wrong?” She sat down on my bed and saw my ring, “Is it about this promise ring?”

“How do you know about it?” I asked while sitting next to her

“I helped Paul pick it out.” She laughed.

“Oh…well—no, its not about that. I think.”

“You think?” she cocked an eyebrow at me.

“Here’s the thing…” I paused, “I’m not sure if I want to leave and go with you and the guys on tour.”

“Why?”

“I think, I think…” I started to choke on my words, “I think I’m falling for Benji.”

Maddie gasped as her eyes widened and she placed a hand over her mouth. “Oh…my...”

“I know…that’s why I’ve been upset. I know I love Paul and care for him…but I think I’m starting to love and care for Benji too.”

“Can I give you one word of advice?” I nodded my head. “Don’t hate me for saying this, but don’t ruin what him and Emily have.”

“I know. That’s why I’ve been upset!” I started tearing again. “But…”

“But what?”

“I promised I wouldn’t say anything.”

“It’s ok. So—what are you gonna do?”

I sat silenced before I answered her question; thinking of what I was going to do. “I—I don’t know. I guess I just have to wait and see what happens…if anything happens.”

“Well…make it quick,” Maddie laughed, “We’re leaving this afternoon.”

“I know…I just need time to think.”

“Ok. If you need me, you know where to find me.”

Maddie left my room, and after sitting in the silence I got up washed my face again and fixed my hair.

 

I walked out into the living room where everyone was sitting around playing a rousing game of Uno!. I could see Joel was winning by the big grin on his face, and the 2 cards in his hand. Surprisingly, Emily and Benji weren’t sitting together. I walked behind Paul, hugging him around his neck. I smiled as I glanced over at Benji, who was watching me. I looked at Emily and she gave me a cold stare that made goose bumps travel down my arms.

“Ha!! I won!” Joel cried out.

“Loser!” Maddie laughed

“Hey Hailey…how are you feeling?” Benji asked me.

“A little better.” I stood up and bit my lip, “Can I talk to you actually?”

“Sure.” Benji stood up, and followed me into the hallway.

“What’s up?” Benji forgot to put down his cards before leaving, so he started playing with them.

I reached out and put my hands over the cards. “Benj, I’m serious. Can you please listen?”

He looked up and me and nodded.

“Wow...I can’t believe I’m going to say this.” I paused to take in a deep breath. “I—I……..I”

“You…?” Benji cocked an eyebrow.

“I was wondering about you and Emily. How are things going?”

“Eh. Not so great. I told her what I told you and she got upset.”

“I could see why.”

“She yelled some things at me…I don’t remember what because I tried to block them out. She’s really upset though, I never meant to hurt her.”

“Aww…” I placed my hands on Benji’s face. “Talk to her about it.”

He took my hands in his, “trust me, I don’t think she’ll wanna talk.”

I crossed my arms and let out a sigh, “Benji…I know this probably isn’t the right time to tell you this, but I have to. It’s been driving me nuts.” He nodded as a sign for me to keep speaking, I laughed. “I think…I think I’m falling in love with you.”

Benji’s face went pale as he stared at me blankly.

I waited for a reaction for a few seconds, “Say something…please.”

“I don’t know what to say” he stuttered as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“Don’t be mad…please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad…I could never be mad at you.” He smiled, “Is this why you were upset before?”

I nodded, “It was driving me crazy.” I clasped the locket Benji had given me in my hands and started playing with it. “What now?” I asked while a tear ran down the side of my face.

He leaned against the wall and slid down to the floor. “Come here.” He gestured to me. I sat next to him placing my head on his shoulder. “Everything’s gonna be alright.”

I laughed at the lyrics he was singing, and that laughter turned into tears.

“Whoa whoa...hold on. Don’t start crying again.” I lifted up my chin with his fingers, “It’s gonna be ok.”

I closed my eyes and before I knew it Benji kissed me.

“What was that?”

“A kiss.” He wisely answered.

“I know…”

“You liked it too, huh?”

I smiled, “Yes.”

Benji kissed me again, placing one hand on my cheek. I kissed him back.

“Wait—no. I can’t.” I said, “I can’t do this to Paul.” I stood up.

“But Hailey…you just told me you loved me.”

“I know...I just…can’t now…I’m sorry Benj.

Benji stood up after me. “if that’s how you feel.”

It all happened so fast. One minute I was kissing Benji, the next I was thinking of a way to lie to Paul if he asked what we were doing outside. Strangely, my feelings for Benji grew after this.

“Lets walk in together so they don’t suspect anything. Ok?”

“Good idea.” And just like that, the two of us joined the rest of the party.

 

I finished packing my things for the next two hours ((hey, she had a lot of shit to pack)). Still unsure if this was the right thing to do, I left with Paul for Chicago at four. As I watched my apartment building get smaller every second, Paul sat next to me and kissed me on the cheek.

“I’m so happy you decided to come with us.” He said as he leaned his head on me.

I played with his hair, “Me too…Me too…”