I would first like to begin by stating that a navel is a terribly absurd thing, and it is most unfair that humans should have them.  They are a constant reminder of the bloody and uncouth manner in which we entered this world (see entry 1/15/07, I Hate Love).  I firmly believe there should be laws in place that force men to keep their navels covered at all times, and for women to have theirs surgically removed upon reaching the age of thirteen.  But not only are we cursed with these ridiculous pits in our stomachs, we are forced to deal with the horrors of them collecting filth.

I swear to you that it does not matter what color of clothing I wear; that despite the fact that I almost never dress in anything other than white linen, I seem to always manage to collect a grayish ball of lint in my navel.  Why is it gray?  Am I being secretly dressed in dark clothing against my will and knowledge?  Or is this lint some kind of waste material secreted by the revolting navel?  In either case it is a most unfair situation.