Ben was a sheep, the only sheep, to be recklessly precise. This was not his most challenging role, but I�d like to think it helped shape his future. I could read depths into the range of his baaing, the stride of his crawling or the sheer ovinity coming from his deepest pore as he filled his role. I�m not going to though, as I wasn�t really watching him; I was there to see my nephew perform in the generally more highly regarded role of wise man. I had been sent to watch by my ever imposing sister, and a good thing too. I met a lady there named Christine, and got on rather well. I regularly used to thank my sister for that. In terms of the play, perhaps I was watching too narrowly, but I didn�t pay a huge amount of attention to the imitation wildlife in the scene, so I�m not going to start going on about Ben�s performance. Instead I�m going to move on and talk about his later, more developed, works.
Please, I don�t have anything against sheep; I just don�t see it as important. I just thought I�d better record this at it was, technically, the first of Ben�s performances that I viewed. Yes, it was a nativity play. No, I don�t remember the plot.
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His second appearance was slightly more auspicious, as �King Bluffenhearty� in the junior school production of �Madame Zira�s Fundamental Fair�. Don�t worry if you don�t recognise the play, it was written by one of my fellow teachers and never really got far. His hopes of a big screen interpretation never materialised, but he still holds high hopes. You may have noticed that he was one of my �fellow� teachers, and that was due to Christine, by now my wife, making me relax and do a job I enjoyed, rather than fretting myself to death in investment banking. I was a maths teacher, but enough of that; Ben was quite impressive for a young lad.
Cast in the role of elderly, gruff and rather stupid King, Ben fought valiantly against a slab of ageing make-up (make up to age him, not old and stale make-up, for those who were wondering) and a ridiculous gown obviously recently converted from Santa Claus duties. Somehow Ben managed to make his bizarre appearance work, not fighting against it, but letting it appear to be a part of his part, if you get my meaning. From this, as he shouted through a frowning brow: �What do you mean, �otherwise detained�?� some true acting potential shone through. I almost starting thinking of the old King as a character in his own right, and not just a frightened kid in a costume, hoping he doesn�t embarrass his parents, as most of the other youngsters seemed to me. He became a (silly) King that day.
The writer-director told me that Ben had been the easiest to direct, which didn�t surprise me. For weeks before the performances the boy had been speaking loudly and sternly in class, using a stick to get around. This was his way of acting: becoming the part, making the character part of himself. Or himself part of the character. I�m not really sure, I�ve never studied the stuff (theatre), but it was impressive in one so young.
OK, I might be overstating the brilliance of a portrayal of a role which, when it came down to it, was just a stereotype in a crappy kiddies� play, you�ll have to indulge me. It�s easy to read potential into a part played many years ago in a man you know to have later grown into an actor of his standard, and I�ve always been one for the easy life, and so that�s what I�ll do. It was a step forward from the sheep, and that�s what matters: going forward, progress.
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I got the pleasure of directing Ben in his next acting endeavour. I was pushing to be Maths Head of Department at the end of the year, when Mr Nok retired, and so tried to do all I could to convince the school I was dedicated enough. I was already coaching the football team, I decided to direct a play as well, just to be on the safe side, let them know I was putting my all into the school. I chose Romeo and Juliet as a safe option, easy to direct, and gave Ben the role of Romeo, obviously.
It wasn�t a tight production; I wasn�t an accomplished director, but I�d like to think I got a raw, powerful performance out of most of the cast, comprised this time of sixth form pupils. Ben and his Juliet soared over the stage, a mad, passionate portrayal of the play, which filled me with all sorts of emotion. I had put a lot into the play, realising early on that I had bitten off more than I should have been able to chew. I watched so many different casts� performances and read so many play guides that I could even now quote every line from that play.
Why was I doing it? As I said, I wanted to be Head of the Maths department. Caroline was pregnant, we needed more money to bring up the baby, I wanted to give our child the best when it was born, and I guess I became obsessed with the idea that this position would give them that. From that I became even more obsessed with the idea that doing this play, doing it well, would give me that position, that promotion. Ben did little to help this obsession. By being so damned good, he fuelled me further, pushing me so that I felt that a poor production would let down not only me, my wife and our baby, but also this huge talent, this young genius in his very formative years.
I shouted and screamed at the cast, I was a ball of nervous energy, and Ben responded every time by notching himself yet higher. In those rehearsals Ben showed what he would show later in his more prestigious roles: a dedication, a depth to his acting that gave him such a huge emotional response in his audiences.
I�m not exaggerating his skill here. In the audience to this play, Ben made more people cry than any other audience of the play I�ve seen before. Real life lovers held hands and stared intensely in each other�s eyes as Ben and his Juliet forged a romance on the stage. I saw one parent leave to get a whole toilet roll to bury her tears in, after Ben committed suicide as the play reached a climax; it was quite remarkable. Even after seeing him perform every day, I dropped a tear or two in each and every one of the five performances. From the second night onwards we even gave out free tissues to the audience to prevent the sniffs, which had slightly spoiled the first night.
The only thing holding Ben back now was his cast. It�s harsh to say, but every time another student spoke, the spell was broken, we returned to reality, the alternate reality Ben had drawn us into was revealed as a mere show. I collapsed after the last performance, was told to relax by the doctor, high blood pressure pills prescribed. It was worth it.
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