Mr Rat's Hall of Horror

The world of horror is indeed full of strange and quite frankly screwed up characters. Although these characters are probably normal compared to most of the staff at Coleraine Uni they still aren't the sort you'll like to meet down the back of some dodgy allyway when your having a piss. In fact, it would be really awkward if you pissed on them and when you tried to appologise they ended up cutting your knob off.

Anyway, here is the top seven (well my top seven) of not only villians but heros who take them on...

No 7. Chucky Chucky is a 3ft doll that goes around killing people. The really scary thing is that he is waist high and since he carrys a knife he could very easily 'change your religion'.....or your gender even..

No 6. Freddy Krueger Freddy Kruger was a very naughty man who particiapted in the very anti-social activity of child killing. The parents didn't see the funny side to this and so burned him to death. Now Freedy haunts the kiddies dreams and is still a naughty man...

No 5. Krug/David Hess David Hess is an actor who appears in such wonderfull films like 'Last House on the Left' and 'House on the Edge of the Park'. These films are banned where I live but I have made a friend in a man called 'Dodgy John' who is a very nice video-shop keeper who sells pirate videos. Our David plays exactly the same character in these films who goes around being a git and making people piss their pants.

No 4. Ash Hail to the King. You can't go much wrong with a guy who cuts his hand off with a chainsaw and then attaches the chainsaw to his hand. And he has a shotgun. He was also in the TV show 'Hercules' but we'll ignore that completly cos it didn't happen at all and is just a figment of our imaginations...honestly.

No 3. Michael Myres The unstoppable killing machine from the Halloween series who spends his days usually in a coma until Halloween when he wakes up and goes killing horney teenagers.

No 2. Reggie the Ice cream man The hero of the 'Phantasm' series. Reggie spends his time driving around in his clapped out Ford Capri, fighting the Tall Man, killing beasties with his 4 (yes FOUR) barralled shotgun and having chainsaw duels will monsters from another dimension. He also tries to pull any hot looking birds on his travels dispite the fact that the world is going to hell.....(what a guy).

No 1. Leatherface The evil cannibal from the legendary 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre' films. Leatherface's greatest moment ever is in the second film when he has a CHAINSAW DUEL with Dennis Hopper. You just don't get enough chainsaw duels in films these days...

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