~Bone Phillips Report~
Cast: Hodgepodge as Bone Phillips
Baby Boy as Blue Man (from Blue Man Group)
Bone Phillips: Good evening,
welcome to the Bone Phillips Report. Woof-woof. Normally you’d see Phil Donahue
at this time, but he took the day off because people thought he was boring. Our
top story tonight: will Chubbley ever stop making Chubbley Bears? We’ll talk to
researcher Squirmy about this, but first: remember the Blue Man Group, a group
of drummers who had blue faces and drummed on computer wires to promote Intel?
Sneakysly2002: no
Bone Phillips: We’re going to
have a talk with one of the members of the Blue Man Group about being the only
one left in the group.
Blue Man: Hello.
Bone Phillips: So, Blue Man,
what happened to the other three?
Blue Man: Well, one went solo and drummed for T-Mobile commercials, but
he was so bad Catherine Zeta-Jones, that girl from “Chicago” replaced him.
Bone Phillips: And what happened
to the other one?
Blue Man: He’s now the butler for Steven, that kid from the Dell
computer commercials. He tried auditioning for a Pepsi Twist commercial to be
played in the Super Bowl but the Osbournes replaced him because he was too bad.
Sneakysly2002: waht about me
Bone Phillips: What do you have
planned for your future?
Blue Man: I don’t know, but I think I’m going to start a Beanie Baby
collection. Of course, charity work is important, and I believe we should do
what we can to save the Beanie Babies from being left on the shelf because of
Chubbley Bears.
Bone Phillips: I agree. The
Chubbley Bears must be stopped, and who better to stop them than the last
remaining member in the Blue Man Group?
Blue Man: It’s not a group anymore. Just call me Blue Man.
Bone Phillips: But nobody knows
who Blue Man is.
Blue Man: Say he’s a superhero
who will save the Beanies from… feeling blue… on the shelf?
Bone Phillips: Makes sense. How
are you going to start?
Blue Man: I’ll start by investing all the money I made from being in
Intel and go broke for Beanies. Everybody used to do it when they were big, and
now I’ll help to make them big again
Bone Phillips: Well, when
Squealer flies.
Blue Man: Yeah, I can’t wait till
that happens. When I start making these Beanie vendors rich off their Beanies,
they’ll be big again! Just you wait and see! Do coverage on that, Cabbage Patch
doll!
Bone Phillips: Nut.
Blue Man: Yeah, and I’m so nutty, there’s something I feel like saying: you are, too! That, and, LIVE, FROM THE BEANIE ZOO, IT’S BEANIEDAY NIGHT!