~Bunga Raya’s Internationale Bears Shau~
Cast: Mother as Bunga Raya

Dublin as Wattlie

Baby Girl as Sakura II

Woody as Britannia

Pappa as Celebrations

Decade as Mohamed Said Al-Doubloon

 

Announcer: Hola, you’re watching “Bunga Raya’s Internationale Bears Shau”, the shau where internationale bears talk to my amigo Bunga Raya about what’s going on in their lives. And now, heeeeere’s Bunga!

Bunga Raya: Gracias, gracias. Welcome to “Bunga Raya’s Internationale Bears Shau”, where I talk to my amigos about their homeland, what’s new with them, and all that stuff. We’ve got a great show tonight. Here with us are two of my friends to talk about the UK Mother’s Day, Britannia and Celebrations. Those two are such kuzuas. I love them. Now, we gotta talk about me now. I’m a yellow bear, and they think yellow bears will become more populated in the Beanie world, bigger than blue soon. And if you mix blue with yellow, chances are you’ll get green. Okay, our first topic: where have all the country exclusives gone? What the papaya? What the pineapple? I can’t even think of fruits because the country exclusives are all retired and they can’t tell me what their home country’s top crops are! Here to talk with us are the last two country exclusives to be retired, Wattlie and Sakura II.

Wattlie: Great to be back, mate.

Sakura II: Glad to be here.

Bunga Raya: Okay. Now, what the hell with the exclusives?
Wattlie: Well, the UK reported because of those annoying Shakespeare presells, he won’t be called Shakespeare.

Bunga Raya: Wattlie, remember that last show when we met Shakespeare? Didn’t even know he wrote “Holes”.

Sakura II: Um, that was by Louis Sachar, and it was recently made into a movie.

Bunga Raya: Oh, yeah. Louis Sachar – he’s a kuzua. Loved his “Wayside School” stories. Remember that teacher who turned her kids into apples?
Wattlie: That’s crazy, mate.

Sakura II: Crazy funny. First time I read that book, I was so cracked up, I wanted to translate it into Japanese.

Bunga Raya: Pleased to hear that. Not funny. Anyway, I don’t remember when Mother’s Day was in the UK, but I don’t care, because here now to talk about their Mother’s Day are UK exclusives Britannia and Celebrations.

Britannia: Hi, Bunga.

Celebrations: Good to see you.

Bunga Raya: Now, when the banana was Mother’s Day in your country?
Celebrations: March 30.

Bunga Raya: You kuzuas! You get an early Mother’s Day! Those no good Malay-si-ans made it May 11. They act like Americans.

Celebrations: I see. Now, my mother is Princess Diana, and since she’s dead, I couldn’t get her a present. So, you know, I just left her some flowers by her grave.

Britannia: Mine’s still alive, and she yells at me every time I go to her. I had to buy her a million dollars worth of presents. I didn’t even know half the stuff she wanted. I mean, what is a “smoked john”? She even asked for stuff she didn’t want, like tickets to “Riverdance”.

Bunga Raya: Here in Malay-si-a, it’s illegal for anyone to see “Riverdance”. It’s too boring.

Britannia: Interesting. Because I was thinking of stealing those tickets and ripping them.

Celebrations: Why can’t you sell them on eBay?
Britannia: I’d probably get paid two bucks for them.

Bunga Raya: Well, hopefully next Mother’s Day everything will work out. I mean, my mom isn’t exactly great… every time I come to her, it’s “No, Bunga, you can’t go out with your friends tonight! You need to baby-sit my parrot!” And I’d be like, “But Mami, why can’t your sister do it?”

Celebrations: Oh, my mom was like that too. She had this crown…

Britannia: My mom has a crown too. You know why? Her name is Liz. Queen Elizabeth.

Celebrations: Liz – isn’t that the name of a girl I used to like?
Britannia: No, I think you mean Chelsea.

Bunga Raya: I think you did marry Liz Taylor, Celebrations. You divorced after only being married for two minutes.

Celebrations: Yeah, I remember that.

Bunga Raya: I hope you’ll excuse me for a moment because we have to interrupt the show for coverage on the war on Chubbley Bears. The Chubbley Bear information minister is about to speak. Here now is Mohamed Said Al-Doubloon.

Mohamed Said Al-Doubloon: Good evening. As you know, the make-believe war on Chubbley Bears has started, but we have looked and looked and looked, and the Beanie Babies are nowhere near Eaton Socon. They are not in Chubbley Headquarters. As a matter of fact, they are no place! But we will continue to do it Chubbley. We will defeat the Beanie Babies once and for all. God bless Charles Rogers and the other guy in charge.

Bunga Raya: Mohamed Said Al-Doubloon is not a kuzua. He wants to kill us and/or make us cheap. But us international exclusives don’t have to worry since we’re the most expensive of them all! What do you people think?
(Wattlie, Sakura II, Britannia, and Celebrations get up to smack themselves in the face)
Bunga Raya: That’s all the time we have for today. Join us tomorrow when we have that Spanish Muppet from “Sesame Street”. Adios!