Lenny: Here's the thing, we're not The Wonders right now. We're Captain Geech and the Shrimp Shack Shooters.

Mr. Patterson: Don't we open at ten on Saturday?
Guy (looking at the empty store): Yes we do, and it's a good thing.

Mr. White: From now on you'll just be The Wonders.
Lenny: As in, I wonder what happened to the Oneders?

Mr. Villapinao: Know what that is?
Lenny: Presidental flashcards?
Mr. V: A bonus. You know why?
Lenny: I have no idea.
Mr. V: To entice you back. The word is out on you O-ne-ders.
Lenny: Hey, that's O-ned-ers.

Guy: Chrissy Thompson?
Faye: Short brown hair.
Lenny: Wait what I miss? Who is she?
Guy: Oh, great polka-dot dress, nursing a beer, over by the photo booth.
The Bass Player: Stayed for both sets.
Lenny: Wait, where was I? Oh playing songs on my guitar.

Jimmy:...well I guess I'm alone in my principles.
Lenny: There he goes off to his room to write that hit song alone in my principles.

Mr. White: It's very good that you don't stink today.
Lenny: Hey I make no garantees.

Guy: Diane Dane? What did she have to say?
Jimmy: Never trust a label.

Lenny: Oh I'm not here with these fellas. I got a pig competition over at the livestock pavilian. And I'm going to win that blue ribbon.

Bass Player: Guys Chad fell down.

Guy: We're going to cream these ladies.

Fan: Eat my shorts Kent.
Kent: Shut up! I'll kick your ass.

Lenny: Tableninteen your pizza is ready.

Mr. Patterson: Let it burn, let it burn. Let it burn all night, bring me out here in the dog garn middle of the night to turn off the light. Why can't he get anything right?

Phil: How are my boys?
Guy: Ready to show Pittsburgh no mercy.

Mr. Patterson: Darlene you just got promoted.
Darlene: You mean you're going to start paying me?
Mr. Patterson: I didn't say that.

Mr. White: You guys look great in red, have I told you that?

Mr. White: You fellas look great in gold, have I told you that?

Mr. White: You look fabulous in the black suits, have I told you that?

Lenny: Well, I like Wisconsin.

Guy: If Jimmy's a genius then I'm Otant.
Bass Player: Who's Otant?
Guy: He's a...never mind.

Guy: Oh my God. Oh my God. Del Paxton is sitting over there.

Lenny: Hey Skits, how did we get here?
Guy: I lead you here sir, for I am Sparticus.

Faye: I have wasted thousands and thousands of kisses on you--kisses that I thought were special because of your lips and your smile and all your color and life. I used to think that was the real you, when you smiled. But now I know you don't mean any of it. You just save it for all your songs. Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed so tight.

Phil Horace: A hit record is like a stew. All the ingredients have to come together just right. Otherwise, it's just soup.

Guy: We used to get all crazy up in Erie, Pennsylvania!
Lenny: Yeah! One time, we stayed up past midnight! *starts to laugh*

Lenny: So how long have you worked at Play-tone?
Receptionist: How long have you been wearing such tight paints?
Lenny: Hey, if that's a pick-up line we're a match made in heaven.

Guy: I'm Guy Patterson, I'm from Erie, Pennsylvania, I'm in a band called The Wonders and we just cut a record, we're out here on the coast and I play the drums and I have all your records well not all of them but a lot of them but ah at least I did until some of them got swiped when I was stationed in Germany and you were playing in Germany at the time that I was stationed there, but you know what I couldn't see you because you were playing in Hamberg and I was stationed in Munich but I listen to your records and I think you're great. You are my biggest fan.
Dell Paxton: Thanks.