Summer in the City

Stella: Guess this'll be a no-brainer for you.
Hawkes: She did not just say that.
Flack and Mac: She did.

Danny: It's hot a little bit, eh?
Stella: What the hell are you wearing that jacket for?
Danny: Ah, my mother still dresses me.

Zoo York

Lindsay to Mac: *after Mac stabs a pig* Well, I'm done eating bacon for life.

Hawkes: Explain to me what a Debutante Bal is precisely?
Stella: It's the presentation of a young woman into High Society.
Hawkes: It looks more like high anxiety.
Stella: Nice.

Mac: I need you to hold the tiger's jaws so I can get the dental impression.
Danny: Just take a deep breath, don't let him know that you're afraid, 'cause he can sense when you're nervous.
Lindsay: The tiger's been tranquilized. I think I can handle it.
Danny: I'm talking about Mac. And make sure you call him Sir.

Mac to Lindsay: What do they feed you up there in Montana?

Corporate Warriors

Stella: Lisa Kay...
Mac: She worked directly underneath him.
Stella: Especially Greg Thompson. We pulled her hair off of his bed.

Hawkes: Who uses snack food to start a fire in an apartment?

Mac: Take a raincheck on the cannolis?
Stella: Oh, nice, so I'm solving and buying?
Mac: Exactly!

Dancing with the Fishes

Hawkes: You know I've never been fishing, never even thought about trying. Seems kinda boring...
Danny: Until you hook something. I went fishing with my old man once on a pier near Battery Park. I caught the sweetest striped bass, must have weighed close to 30 pounds.
Hawkes: Did you eat it?
Danny: Threw it back! Would you eat anything that came out of the Hudson?
Hawkes: Good point!

Flack: Goodbye suicide.
Stella: Hello murder.

Manhattan Manhunt

Mac: Me? I don't pity you, Darius. There's a lot of people with worse stories than yours - they never hurt anyone. You killed 12 people in two states over the last 72 hours and you want me to feel sorry for you because your daddy… didn't kiss you when you were a baby? You asked for my help? I did help you - you're where you belong... You rot in hell, you son of a bitch.

Stella: No girl leaves her house without her cell phone, at least not at that age.
Mac: GPS the phone number.
Stella: You got it. Tiffany's! Now you're talking my language.
Mac: You can tell from a map?
Stella: Are you kidding, I can tell from the moon. I love those little blue boxes.

Bad Beat

Lindsay: Ah, now, see? That's a shame.
Mac: What's a shame?
Lindsay: Somebody went and threw away a perfectly good shotgun.

*A tape with previously a documentary on walruses has been repaired with footage of the victime being intimate with an unknown partner.*
Lindsay: Footage from your 30th birthday party, Messer?
Danny: Walrus documentary actually...
Hawkes: It's Tara Stansfield, our victim from the park.
Lindsay: Who is the other walrus?

City of the Dolls

*standing in the doll hospital*
Detective Maka: Never broke an arm off your G.I. Joe?
Danny: Yea, but I did it on purpose, casualty of war.

*Danny holding a piece of evidence*
Stella: You're gonna have to do more than stare at it.
Danny: I'm waiting for it to talk to me.
Stella: Ah, then you might wanna buy it a drink first.

Trapped

Stella: That's it? No butler?
Flack: No.
Stella: Too bad. I thought we could wrap this one up quick.
Flack: What?
Stella: Mansion like this, it's always the butler. Didn't you ever play Clue?
Flack: I was a Monopoly guy

Flack: What have you got there?
Stella: Surfactant and hypochlorite.
Flack: And for those of us with just a high school diploma?

Risk

Conducter: The Guy was a do-to-do.
Lindsay: A do-to-do?
Conducter: Where are you From? Jersey?

Sid: Sorry for the delay.. QT and I were busy necking.
Stella: Come again?
Sid: Necking! Looking at his neck! You don't think I'd kiss corpses, do you?
Stella: No, no.. of course not!
Sid: That's disgusting!
Stella: I agree!

Stuck on You

Mac: Our killer's a hunter...and his prey is human.

Mac: You guys on the music promoter?
Danny: Like glue.
*Mac laughs as he walks away*
Lindsay: He doesn't think that's funny. He's humoring you.
Danny: You don't know him like I do.

Lindsay to Danny: Maybe you didn't know him as well as you thought.

Fare Game

Flack: You don't call, you don't write, I'm beginning to think you're seeing other detectives.

Live or Let Die

Danny: Mr. Fisherman, we're in a hurry - do me a favour, let us borrow your gadget.
Tony the Fisherman: No - get your own.
*Mac pulls out his badge and shows it to Tony*
Mac: Please.
Tony the Fisherman: You see that? A little politeness goes a long way.

Tony the Fisherman: Just, uh... um, take your time... relax, that's it, that's it. Visualize, become one with the gum.

Super Men

Danny: Don't tell me you know a little something about football, please.
Lindsay: Why? Is that so hard to believe?
Danny: No, just dangerous. *Lindsay looks up* I might ask you to marry me.

Stealing Home

Stella: Mac, are you seeing this?
Mac: Yeah, a mermaid. Why not?
Lindsay: No throwing this one back.
Mac: This one's a keeper.

Danny: Montana! *Lindsay looks at him.* See a view like this, eh? *refers to the bay and the city* Beats the wheat fields, no?
*Lindsay walks over to stand beside him and look at the view.*
Lindsay: Have you ever even seen a wheat field? *goes back to the body*
Danny: *after a moment of silence* What's to see? It's just wheat.

Lindsay: You think Danny calls me Montana because I'm a 49er's fan?
Sid Hammerback: He calls you that because he has a crush on you.

Heroes

Stella: This wasn't about torching a car.
Lindsay: It was about hiding a body.

Stella: That woman burned beyond recognition in your car, was a DETECTIVE!

Danny: Mac, is this him, the scumbag that killed Aidan?!
Mac: Danny, get out of here.
Danny: Just let me talk to him. Aww. I will get him to crack, I promise you that.
Mac: How?! By tuning him up? Stella's got the case, she knows what to do!
Danny: This is Aiden! She's one of our own, Mac!
Mac: That's why we can't make any mistakes. We do this one by the book, understand?
Danny: Alright, I just wanted to help.
Mac: I know, me too.

Lindsay: How well did you know her? Aiden.
Dr. Hawkes: Well enough to know that if one of us had been killed, she wouldn't sleep until the killer was caught.

Stella: We're exactly where Aiden was eight months ago, staring the criminal right in the face, powerless to bring him to justice.

Charge of this Post

Mac to Flack: Stay with me, Don. Stay with me.

Mac: I'm glad you stayed.
Stella: That's what we do; we take care of each other.