jokes

We've decided to add a joke page to this site really because everyone I know has a very worped since of humor. If you are a blond please don't be affened, Because what page would be a joke page with out some blond jokes.

Remember just smile and laugh with us a while and yes these are clean jokes, No dirty jokes here unless you want tp tell the one about the pig falling in the mud hole. Anyway if you would like to submit a joke just click the botton below and write away...............................................

1.     A new preacher was setting behind a desk just getting used to his new job when the phone rang. The man on the other line began to tell him that they needed some one to preach a grave side service. Having never done one he was nervice about saying yes but when he found no one would be there he felt like he had to. the next day he decided to leave and hour earl, but then got lost and showed up a half hour late. He gets out of his car and notices that the hearst is gone and no one is there besides two workers. So he slowly walks up the the grave and see's the vault had already been put into place. He said his few words, turned to walk away and the two works turned to each other and began to laugh. One worker looked at the other and laughed uncontrolably then said...........................
    "do you think we should have told him it was a septic tank?"

2. A blond came home one day to find her house a shamble and that some one had stole her blind. She calls the police franticly to have them come and investigate. The first police to answer the call happens to be a k-9 unit. When he shows up the blond is setting on her porch still wailing and sobbing. When she looks up she see the dog coming up the side walk and goes into a fit.
" I come home to find my house a wreck and my things stolen and is this what the police department sends me! A blind police officer!!!!!!!!

3. The definition of out door barbequeing......
     1 The woman goes to the store.
     2 The woman fixes salad, sides and dessert
     3 woman prepare meat and places it on the tray along with the nessesary untinsiles spices and other fixens
     4 man places meat on grill
     5 woman goes inside to set table and check veggies
     6 woman comes out to tell man meat is burning
     7 man takes meat off grill and hands it to woman
     8 the woman prepares the plates and brings them to the table
     9 after eating woman clears the table and does the dishes
     10 man asks woman how'd she lie her night off and after seeing her reaction he determines that no matter what you do you can't please a woman.

HOW TO GET OUT OF YOUR NEXT SPEEDING TICKET
A police pulls a guy over and they have the following exchange.
Officer: may I see your drivers liscenes?
Guy : What drivers liscenes I had them taken away after my 5th dui.
Officer: May I see your proof of registartion?
Guy: it's not my car I stole it
Officer: the car is stolen?
Guy: Yeah but come to think of it I saw it in the glove box when I shoved my gun in there
Officer:there is a gun in the golve box?
Guy: yeah I put it in ther right after I shot the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.
Officer: there is a body in the trunk????????????
Guy : Yes sir.
after hearing this the Officer gets on the radio and soon the car is surrounded. The captain comes to the side of the car.
Captain: Can I see your liscense?
Guy : yes sir here they are . there valid.
Captain: who's car is this ??
Guy: It's mine, heres the registartion.
Captain: can you open your glove box so I can see if there is a gun in it?
Guy: yes but there is no gun. And sure enough there was no Gun.
Captain: would you open your trunk to see if there is a body in it?
Guy : sure Opened it no body
captain: I don't understand this. The officer that stopped you said you had no liscense, you stole this car shot the owner and shoved her in the trunk.
Guy::: Yeah and I bet he told ya I was speeding too!!!!!!!!!!!!

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