So tonight i'm sitting outside condemning my self to a long and painful battle with cancer later in my life. But it cannot be helped. I have slept less than four hours in the last 72 and I cannot sleep. I rarely fall ill but when I do, as I did approximately four days ago, I spend countless nights lying awake because I cannot breath. At least tonight the cold night air is clearing my sinuses and soothing my throat. I'm taking sporadic breaks to venture inside and warm up while I type small pieces of this letter. Its a bit too cold to be sitting outside in nothing more than a wife beater on beneath a thin zippered sweatshirt. Of course its not zipped, that's not how I roll. To be specific its 37 degrees.
In the cold night air I have been smoking and looking at various things in a telescope. The only thing I observed tonight that I would expect any one reading this to have heard of was Uranus. Its a hard object to spot. You cant see it with the naked eye, its too dim at a magnitude of 5.96, to be seen without a telescope. This is a harder task than one might think. Without a fancy computer program and a motorized base you have to aim the telescope using angles and a compass. The whole process is made more difficult by the fact that the object is moving, at about 4 miles per second, and the fact that the ether makes my hands shake. When I finally found it was a rather unremarkable gray speck surrounded by nothingness. Not to put down a 191,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 pound ball of hydrogen, helium, water, ammonia, and methane 63 times the size of earth. Its amazing in its own right, but I would have to guess that its visual appeal must increase drastically as you get closer. Not that I would want to go there, breathing anything other than our oxygen atmosphere is generally not a good idea. A more interesting object I saw tonight was Messier Object 77. M77 is a spiral galaxy 47 million light years away, so it has a better excuse for being nothing more than a fuzzy smudge of diffuse light in the night sky. After all, the light entering my telescope tonight left M77 more than 46 million years before Brahma shat human life onto the earth. That's right Christians, the Hindus were right, get over it and enjoy your next life as something that sucks.
Just like Dennis Kucinich, he sucks. We should all thank Brahma that Dennis Kucinich is an idiot who claims to have seen ufo's and felt a deep connection with the ship which gave him directions. Why the fuck is this guy running for president? An even better question is why is Mitt Romney running for president? A better question yet, why in their lord and savior Jesus name are the republicans backing a Mormon? God I fear for this country. Nothing in the future looks good. That is why I will be practicing my god given and patriotic right to sleep all day on Election Day. at least then when the country is in ruins, over run by ufo's, men with 5 wives, and god forbid Hillary Clinton, I can say
"hey man, see how fucked up that is? Yeah, I had nothing to do with that.".
Everything is going to shit. That's why I have to believe to some extent, that there is something else out there. Because if we as humans are the best thing that the universe or any god has managed to create than they deserve an "F". Unless all of existence is part of some story for some greater beings creative writing class, then they deserve an "A" with only a slight recommendation for psychiatric help.
Fuck it. Its time to get out of here. My mouth tastes like metal and my hands are shaking. Time for one more smoke in the cold night air and then off to bed. Maybe tonight I will be able to sleep. . .
khuda hafiz. . .
