REBORN

PASSES US BY

TO DAVID

A DEEPER LEVEL

SOMEDAY

WHATEVER

 FEAR AND FAITH

THE SUN RISES......

MY ANGEL

EMOTIONAL INTENSITY

My life
Struggling with who I am
Wondering when the day will come
To release all my fears
All my pain all my tears
The time has come
To stand up and breathe
Breathe the life back into me
Create myself
Live my life for myself
Heart and mind finally healed
How long it has taken
So many years
Wasted away on nothing
I am strong and free
I can become anything
I want to be
Tired of the bottomless pit of life
I have finally reached the top
As I crawl out
I see something
Something I have never seen before
The path has appeared
I must walk down it to my destiny
It will be a long journey
With many obstacles along the way
I am strong
I am no longer afraid
For I will make my way
Down the path
When I reach the end
The sun will shine down on my face
And dry all my tears
Absorb all my fears
And give me life
Reborn finally

The sun rises

The sun sets

So much is left behind

Another day passes by Unclean

And most of all Unseen

By our blinded eyes

Eyes full of confusion

Lost is the blank stare

Followed by a clouded mind

The reflection of the water

Paints the sky blue

The wind carries the scent

Of the beautiful blossoming flowers

The many faces  that pass us by

Followed by laughter and a smile

The incredible children in our lives

Saying three simple words I love you

Possibly a chance to feel the love of another

Given to you

Openly and freely

You need to open your eyes

Clear you thoughts and stares

Look around and see

Everything you have been missing

Sometimes when you are not paying attention

Someone comes to you

If for only a second, or longer

It appears as if you were one

Or do you just share

The same life experience

A deeper level of level of life

That many people chose to build walls around

That many people will never understand

The passion of one's heart

Misunderstood bye so many

Such a incredible gift

And a terrible curse at the same time

The pain you have to go through to get

To where ever it is you are going

The scars you carry heavily on your heart

To leave you but a memory of all that was

And all that is to become

Which road in life do i take now......  is the question

Should I follow my heart and feel.....

Or follow fear.......

Only time will tell....

I am not here to criticize or judge you

But there is something you must open your eyes and see

You will never be on a deeper level

Than me

The intenseness I have to live with every second of the day

Drives everyone away

No one can understand for my soul deludes them

For I walk into peoples lives

And they start to see

They start to feel

It is like gasping for air and finally getting a breath

Letting your walls down, leaving nothing to rest

What they have wanted and dreamed of their whole lives

Is placed in the palm of their hands

Right before their eyes

Not knowing why they do not see

Blinded are they from my bright eyes

Not feeling the love I have inside

The incredible gift God gave unto me

And I will use it guided in his rays

No matter how many walk away

For I am the blessing placed in their path

Washed away in sadness

In this overwhelming world

Of confusion and suffering

We wake up one morning

Full of happiness

Only to fall asleep

To freighting endless dreams

Waking feeling drained and empty

Terrified of what our

Subconscious is trying to tell us

Could our dreams be our true reality

Yet our minds block us from the change

The change we want so desperately

But do know how to explain

Or even put the pieces to the puzzle together

When one piece falls into place

Yet the others seem to never fit

I know what my dreams are trying to tell me

But I am comfortable where I am at

That I fear change

To express how I am really feeling

To let go of those secrets I carry around

In my heart

And figure out the madness and insanity

That makes me unable to change

And let go of my secrets

And be honest with myself and make that change

Someday

All of you people who pretend to care

May I ask why you judge me so

You condemn for

Myself

My mothering skills

Every decision I make in my life

You have no idea

The way I feel

You will never understand

How would you

You are to busy blaming me

Instead of looking within your soul

I give and I give

But to you money is giving

I would rather have nothing

Then to have that held over my head

I give in a different way

Take a look at yourself and maybe

You will realize you have to condemn others

For you to be able to deal with your issues

I get so angry and anger leads to confusion

I do not understand how a person can take for granted

What is given so freely

I have no reason to show you respect

For you already took it away

Throwing my mistakes in my face

So to give to you anymore

Why what good does it do me

You use it against me

It is to that I do not care but

Inflicting selfishness on me

You are just slicing away at the open wounds

That is trying to desperately heal

A scare is something that never goes away

Maybe money took care of your problems

But money will never take care of mine

All I want in life is to be

Loved

Respected

Appreciated

It may feel that void for a short time

But guess what money is given to people to make up

For what the person is lacking

Which most likely is the abandonment of love

Circle of flames surrounding my body and soul

Crouched down covering myself like a helpless child

No way out, no way in

All I can do is sit and wait for the fire to go out

Feelings of entrapment and hopelessness

Overwhelms me with fear, fear that is eating my flesh

Getting closer to completely destroying who I am

I start to pray to the only thing that can comfort me

Suddenly I see a light outside the flames

A comforting feeling starts to wash over me

Like the first drop of rain flowing down my entire body

To the earthly ground

The light speaks to me and says my child

Why do you build this circle of flames around?

Your fear you feel inside

You are only creating a false reality

Let go and have the courage to walk through the fear

To the place that you belong

Drawn towards the light I stand up and close my eyes

And walk through the flames towards freedom

As I emerge from the center of the circle

My fears disappear into the flames

As I open my eyes I am standing in the most incredible beauty

I can no longer see the light

Only the darkness with the moon shining down on my face

I call out to see if you are still there

You say to me, my child, you no longer have to suffer in fear

Have faith and I will be there

You may not see me or hear me, but I am always with you

The voice then begins to fade away filling my heart and soul

With serenity and hope

The last thought when I fall asleep is you

The first thought when I wake is you

Alone in all the minutes of the day

Waiting for the one touch to finally free

The intense passion within my body

Screaming

Yearning

For you to love me

In ways I never dreamed

I sit and wait patiently

For the day when our eyes meet

For the day when I can feel you heart beating against mine

For the day when two halves become one

It gets harder every passing day

Until the day reveals to us our

Destiny

I hope and pray that I will find away to you

For I believe you are the one

Who holds the key to unlocking

The ability for me to love unconditionally

I believe you exist without a doubt

I know you surround me with your motherly protectiveness

And your Godly light

Unlike anything I have ever seen before

Your pictures resemble pure beauty

When I look upon you my heart is overwhelmed

With powerfulness I cannot explain

I am drawn to your energy

Yet I cannot reach out and touch you

I want so badly to see you

To feel you

To have you wrap your wings around my soul

And take away my pain and misery

To use your light to heal my heart

To feel your presence would give me hope and strength

Take my hand and guide me to your world

Show me the light so I am no longer blind

My whole life the emotional intensity has driven me insane

the pain unbearable at times

you say you understand, but the question really is

you will never understand for you are unable to walk in my shoes

umcomfortable in my own skin

living second, to minute, to hour

fighting the tears that flow from my eyes

morning to night, sleep to wake

i do not know why i cry or where it comes form

the emptiness

leaves me bored

the loneliness scares me

and the pain seems like it will never go away

i know that you are unable to understand

but in some time in your lifetime

felt the same unbearable pain

i on the other hand

feel the pain daily