Joxer sighed as he sat alone in the square of the town.  Red, white and pink webbed Corinth's town centre.  Flowers and ruffles of papyrus decorated every lintel, every door, every arch.

It was Cupid's Day.

And another year now passed since the last Cupid's Day reminded him of how alone he really was.   This was the door frame he always sat at - the butcher's family owned the  square-front apartment.  The town centre was hot property.  To him, it was a place he could let the world go by for a time, and blend into the scenery.  It was possibly the only time he actually didn't mind not being noticed.   Slowly, he stood, and glancing to the sky he saw the sun in the west, descending in its arc.  The major Cupid's Day celebrations started at night, and he decided with a long sigh, that like every other year, he would move on
east past Megara, as Cupid's Day was as useful to him as a third eyeball.  He bagan to plod down the stpes, when he heard an odd sound.  Maybe it was his mother calling him.

 "Joxer, wait!"

 Xena rolled her eyes.
 
 "Don't call him," she joked, "You know what day it is, he might get the wrong idea!"

 Gabrielle gave a thin smile and looked back to Joxer.  He looked so forlorn, gazing on at the festivities longingly.  He sat at the step like a dejected child.  In many ways, he was.  His helmet slumped down over his high brow, hiding his cheekbones, but revealing his eyes, full of sadness, and his lips and lower face drawn in a pout.  Gabrielle sighed.

"Xena, we can't leave him there!"

 Xena rolled her eyes again, "Go on then!"

 Suddenly, Joxer stood up, as if to turn away from the festivities.

 "Joxer!"

 He looked about him and went to move on.

 "Joxer, wait!!"

 Finally he turned around and Gabrielle waved.

 He thought he was seeing things.  There was Gabrielle, like an angel she had pink and white flowers laced through her hair.  Xena was next to her, one solitary flower in her hair.  Why were they in Corinth?  Who cared!!  They were *here*!  His two best friends in the entire world.  Just as he was about to barrel down the steps towards them, the world slowed down, and stopped.   He whirled around, armour clanking after him.  He frowned.

 "Great!" he sighed, "Just as the day gets good, it goes all slow and dies on me!"

 "Joxer..."

 He whirled about again, and there at the step stood Cupid, resplendant in leather strams and loin-cloth.

 "Oh hi Cupid," Joxer smiled lazily.  He doubled back. "CUPID!!"

 "Yeah, that's me," stated the Godling, raising a hand, "Don't wear it out already!"

 "Yeaaaokay!" Joxer slapped on a grin, "So... how's life treatin' ya?"

 "Fine," Cupid said with finality, dispensing with the small talk. "Listen, I'm here to give you your 'Me' day gift and buzz off to Psyche - it is 'Me' day you know!"

 "How could I forget," Joxer mumbled, kicking the step.  He brightened suddenly, "Hey - what gift?"

 "From Mom," said Cupid, "She saw that her 'Favourite Studmuffin' wasn't enjoying himself today and she wanted to remedy it by being your secret Cupid's Day sweetheart, and giving you a 'special' present."
 
 "Buh-ah-" Joxer laughed uneasily and pointed to himself, "She-I mean-oh wow!-buhh-Gabby!"

 Cupid rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I know, so does Mom.  That's why she wanted me to give you this."

 The God smiled a little, up until then saying it all so drolly.  From his quiver he pulled an immaculate silver arrow.  Set into it's tip was a ruby, glowing like a drop of blood.  He notched it, ready to take aim.  Joxer jumped forward.

 "Wait, no!"

 Cupid looked at him sideways and smiled, letting the quilled arrow fly.  It his right on target, exploding in a cloud of sparkles against - Gabrielle.

 "It's a very rare kind of arrow," said Cupid, crossing his arms in resign, "Mom told me not to tell you the specifics, but believe me,"  he wagged a hand in emphasis, "It's a real doosey!"

 At that, golden rain burst and enveloped the young lithe God, fading him into nothingness.  Joxer jumped forward, his hands grasping air.

 "CUPID!"

 "Joxer!"

 Joxer blinked.

 Slowly, the world swung into motion again.   At the bottom of the steps Gabrielle and Xena waited for him, Gabrielle
smiling so softly up at him - as if she had waited all day to see him and now her thirst was quenched.  He dove down the steps, alarm in his features, and his goot caught up, causing him to fall flat on his face.

 "Joxer!"

 Gabrielle sprand down next to him, helping him up.  He glared at her.

 "You don't love me, do you Gabrielle?!" he asked, his eyes wide.   She gave an uncomfortable grimace, "Nnoo, I can't say that I do..."

 He sighed heavily, a long grin spreading across his face, "Thank the-"

The grin disappeared.  She saw the pout form on his lips and her short smile returned.

 "At least - not like *that*!"

 "Yeah!" Joxer laughed, "Yeah, that's - that's what I meant!"

 Pulling him up, Gabrielle smiled.

 "So, what are you doing here?"

 "Uuhmm - just sittin'," he replied, then pointed to them, "Hey - why're you guys here?  I thought you were heading down to Tiryns..."

 "I managed to persuade Xena to stay on a while here in Corinth, for the Cupid's Day Festivals!  Why miss out on the best party for months?"

 "Oh," he nodded, "Well, I was just on my way-"

 "Out of town," Xena smirked.

 "To the *ta-vern*," he corrected her, "You guys wanna - come along?"

 "Sure," Xena smiled warmly, "Don't see what harm a *mug*" she emphasized the singular, "of ale could do!"

 "Great!" grinned Joxer, wrapping his arms around his friends, and taking a step towards the tavern.

 "Uh - Joxer?"

 He glanced to Gabrielle who held up his helmet.  He gave a goofy grin, and Gabrielle dropped the helm on Joxer's head.  At that she pulled him along and the three headed off.

----------------------

 Ares pouted.

 Today's records were terrible.

 Barely anyone in Greece or Rome were fighting.  Sparta was even quiet and in Thebes - not a sound.  He clenched his theeth, his jaw muscles bulging as he did so.

 Discord sat at the foot of his pedistal, pouting just as darkly.   Ares hated Cupid's Day, and he was barely paying her any attention, except for yelling at her about how lousy it was that no wars were really cranking.  If it wasn't that particular gripe, it was bitching and moaning about how there was no 'War Day' or 'Ares' Day', and if it wasn't either of those complaints, he would just sit there in a dark puddle of energy and pout.  Just like now.

 "Ooh!"

 Ares moved his eyes as if they were lead, falling upon the bouncing Discord.

 "A family fight just broke out!" Discord concentrated, "And a bar room brawl!"

 The God of War's eyes heaved upwards once more.   Discord cocked a lip and sulked.  *Poo!* she thought.

-------------------------

 Gabrielle leered, reaching our across the table.

 "MEAD!" she hollered, "MORE MEAD!"

 Joxer chuckled madly, his arm draped over Xena's shoulder, his leg draped across the more than tipsy bard's lap.  The bard grabbed the jug a wench had brought her and grinned as she filled her mug with it.  She also filled Joxer's, shoving it into his hand.

 "You know - love is a bitch..."

 "Oh Gods," Xena groaned, "Not this one..."

 "No!" Gabby lifted a finger to silence her friend, "I will tell this story!"

 "I love lissning to you sssories Gabielle - Gabbieelle -"

 "Just," she tried to focus her eyes on Joxer's face, "Juss call me Gabby..."

 Joxer physically melted, a long leer sliding across his features, "Ohhh ookay Gab-by!"

 "Where was I?"

 "Someone wazz a bisch I think..."

 "LOVE!" cried out Gabrielle, "What a SSHHOKE!"

 "They have a day for it you know," said Joxer, "You think thass a sign we're mizzin out on somefin?"

 "Aaah," Gabrielle curled a lip and waved a hand in dismissal, "They have a day for wheat too!  Ha!  Wazzat get us?"

 "Bread," Xena replied darkly.

 "Ezzactly!" Gabrielle nodded slowly, pointing the finger again, "Nussing but lousy bread - and whaah we doo wizz bread?"

 "We eat it," Joxer said. 


 "Aaah - you see?" she said, "You need bread!  We need love!"


 "I though- you sed izz a bitch!"


 "It IS!" she cried, "THAT'S THE PARIDI- THE PARADUM - THE -"


 "Paradox," Xena finished. "I'm going outside for a quick walk..."


 "Okay," Gabrielle nodded, "You do that - Jogszzer and I talk about paradidums..."


 Xena sighed deeply, pulling herself up off the floor in front of the bench at the table, staggering towards the door.  She didn't get drunk very often - her tolerance had gone down.  Gabrielle barely ever drank in her life - thusly her tolerance was nonexistance.  She knew she should have specified no more than HALF a mug of ale.   The night outside was filled with beautiful lights, lamps and music.  People danced and spun to the floating tunes, mostly couples, celebrating the fact that they were able to love eachother - all thanks to Cupid.  Before Cupid, love was a lusty needful thing.  Since Cupid, it have become a lifelong, soulmate thing.  She sighed long.  She hated it, and was thankful for it all the same time.

 "Oh - you've finally stopped filling yourself with poison..."

 That voice - young, irritating.


 Xena turned around slowly, with less grace than she hoped she would have.


"Dizzcord..."


 "Oh man - you reek," The dark Godling waved the air in front of her nose, "You smell like a tavern..."

 "I just drank my way through a tavern," she said darkly, "Izz not surprizing."

 "Aah," Discord's nose wrinkled prissily, "That explains a lot.  You humans are really revolting."

 "Whaddaya WANT?"

 Discord rose a brow at Xena, who seemed to be a little annoyed at her lack of self-control.

 "Okay here's the deal - Ares is being the major bummer tonight - I need you to cheer him up a bit so he'll have some fun with me - it is Cupid's Day after all."

 Xena rose a brow, "You celebrate Cupidz day?!?"

 Discord lifted her nose in the air, "We Gods have feelings too.  Prick us do we not slug you?"

 Xena rolled her eyes, shifting her weight and nearly falling over.  She found the Tavern wall and kept her balance.  "How am *I* supposssah make Aresss happy?"

 Discord let her nose wrinkle again and she flapped her hands at Xena, "Oh you know - do that insolent human thing to him - it always gets him angry and he loves it..."

 Xena rose a brow, "And it'll get you nookie?"

 Discord smirked, "Damn straight!"

 It was Cupid's Day - she'd do the bint a favour.

 "Okay okay, bring him on!"

 With a cold flash the Godling was gone.  After that, another flash occured, and a burly God nearly fell to the ground in shock.
 "DISCORD!" he bellowed, "What the-"

 Glancing in front of him he noticed the inebriated Xena frowning at him with much distaste.

 "Xena..." A dent creased his brow, "Wh- What am I doing here?"

 "You're here to get pissed off... Discord wants nookie again!"

 There was a screech, and Discord burst from the ether.

 "YOU DON'T!"  Meeting the God of War's angered glare, she slunk back a bit, whispering harshly, "You don't just tell HIM!!"

 Xena grimaced, "Now you lissen you little pidifull essuuse for a God of someeiin uzeless!"

 Ares smirked.

 "I telleh TRUTH!" Xena swallowed, trying to regain some composure, "Even when I'm shrunk!"

 Discord hissed, "OHHH!  I'm gonna-"

 "Go away," Ares said, putting a hand on her arm, "I'll deal with you later."

 Discord, with a shake of her rear, disappeared.  Ares turned to Xena, smiling slightly.

 "I haven't seen you this..."

 "Shrunk," finished Xena.

 "I was going to say amiable," he said, "Towards a God in a long time."

 "When you're in this state," Xena said, "The less conflict the better."

 Ares, again, smiled.

 "My thoughts exactly."

 "Whazz that look for?"

 "It's Cupid's Day," he said.

 Xena narrowed her eyes, "Oh no, don't you be thinking..."

 "You mean you don't," he stepped forward, running a finger along her collarbone, "Not even just *one* night," he whispered.  Xena felt his warmth close, and let loose a growl.

 "You know I *hate* your guts!" she spat.

 Ares leered, "Only my guts?"

 Xena said nothing, only bit down on her tongue.

 "That's okay then, it's not my guts you got to deal with..."  His lips dove for her neck.  She grabbed his face in her hands, squeezing with her vice-like grip.  "Oohhph - I lofvbe it whum ye ppsplay wrouff"

 Xena pushed him away, storming back to the bar.

"A drink then," he said, "There's a quiet spot in the barn to the back - you and I, and some Godly mead..."

 Xena narrowed her eyes at him.

 "No strings attached!"

 "There are *never* no strings attached!" she growled again.  She looked him up and down.  His raven curled locks were wayward, the odd sheen of grey shining in the golden lamp-light.  The breeze made some wisps at the front float in the
cool winter breeze.  His sculptured features almost glowed in the warm light from the tavern, and his olive skin seemed smooth and delightful.  She was sure it was the mead talking to her, but an almost human look took the monster's face before her.  She shrugged, looking up at the sky.

 "Oh for the God's sake!  Let's go!"
 

-------------------------------
 

 Gabrielle looked at the mug in her hand, the rest of her limbs tangled in Joxer's.  She moved her wavering eyes to him, the both of them slumped in the dark corner of the tavern's bar.

 "You know, you really a good frienn Jogser."

 He blinked at her slowly, "I know."

 She laughed, pushing her nose against his.

 "Gabby," he said, "Have you ever heard of Cupid shooting silver arrows?"

 Gabrielle frowned at an achingly slow speed, then turned her head shakily to his.

 "Yeah - I have.  Why - you seen someone be shot?"

 "Yeah - whaa they mean?"

 Gabrielle blinked slowly, leaning on Joxer's shoulder.

 "Well the recipient of the arrow will fall in love with the person it was shot for - see the Gods choose that in this case - but the arrow works only when that person is kissed by the person it was shot for - you know iss kinna compeehlicated."

 "What if ih got a ruby on it?"

 "Oh," Gabrielle's nose wrinked, "Cennaurh poobies, I dunno whah thah means.  Probbly the same - who got shot?"

 Joxer shook his head, "Never minn."

 "I'm tired," Gabrielle sighed, "Less go do bed."

 Joxer gulped, "I'll take you to *your* bed Gabby," he said, pulling her up to her feet.

 "Hmmm," she grinned, "I know!"

 Staggering up the stairs of the Inn, Joxer managed to open the door.  He sighed, laying the semi-conscious Gabrielle down.  He pulled some pelts up from underneath her, gathering them about her.

 "Joxer..."

 Joxer looked up, Gabrielle all snug in her bed.

 "I think that maybe, it'd be nice to be hit with that arrow, if it was for you..."

 "You-"  Joxer gulped, beads of sweat forming on his brow, "You don't mean that..."

 Gabrielle grinned, chuckling, "Of course I do!  You're a nice guy - it'd be nice being in love with you..."

 He felt his heart rage madly in his chest, till the words-

 "It's such a pity I'm not..."

 fell from the bard's mouth.

 Joxer didn't know what came over him, but taking her hand, a delicate porcelain form, silken in texture, he said softly,  'You're not?"

 She looked at him a long moment, a soft frown taking her face.

 "Hmmm," she yawned, "I - dunnow..."  She chuckled suddenly, "You know it's times like this I think maybe... maybe you're kinda cute."

 Joxer blushed, "You're drunk Gabrielle," he said, the moment and adrenalin sobering him up some, "You don't know what you're saying."

 "Noo, Joxer!" she whispered with urgency, "I do!  I really do!  I care for you lots - you're a beautiful friend to me... so lovely all the time... so silly..."

 She chuckled.

 "I know I am," he smiled sadly, "It's what I am - a bumbing - sidekick."

 "You're not my sidekick," she said, somehow clear in her words, "You're my dear dear friend.  Can I give you a Cupid's Day present?"

 Oh Gods, thought Joxer.

 "Wh-wh-wh-what would that be?"

 Reaching out, she grabbed Joxer's collar, and pulled him close to her.

 "N-n-n-no Gabrielle, you don't wan-hmmm"

 Her lips took his in a tender silken kiss, the cockel-shell touch of teeth so brief till she pulled away.

 "For you," she said, laying back on the bed and rolling over, she breathed out a sigh, "I love you Joxer."

 Joxer felt tears well in his eyes, "I know you do."

 He turned, his heart heavy with guilt.  She said she loved me, he thought, why?  She never showed any sign of it before - the arrow!  He found the corner of the room, pulling the shred of a blanket around him, and stoking the room's fire, he snuggled up near it.  With a warm sting and the rough of the throat, he felt tears fall from his eyes, his lids swelling with sadness.

 "How could you?" he breathed to the Goddess of Love, wherever she was, "You took away Gabrielle's choice... you've ruined it all!"

 Slowly, he let the night's darkness take him, his eyes never leaving the form of Gabrielle.  He watched her pelt rise and fall with her breaths - longing and guilt mixed together in a sickening broth.

------------------------------------------------

 Xena opened her eyes, sleep cracking her vision.  Shaking her head, she sat up, and hay fell about her mussed-hair.  She patted the hay-stack next to her, and hit hard - abdomens?

 "Dear Gods -"

 "Ouugh..."

 From the mound of yellowed flax the raven-topped God of War emerged, his top half without vest.

 "Good morning!" he grinned, "Glorious one isn't it?"

 Xena narrowed her eyes darkly.

 "It never happened!"

 Ares merely smirked.

------------------------------------------------

  The road to Tiryns was long and rocky - Xena and Gabrielle travelled it, the skin under their eyes darkened from the night before.  They had set off late, and the town was a wreck from the previous night's festivities.   Joxer lagged behind, watching the pair lope ahead.   Once or twice, Gabrielle had glanced back, a soft sad gaze her  message to him.  His heart was heavy, knowing that Gabrielle's new confusion - one attributed to him - was all a Godly ruuse.

 Night fell sweetly on the trio, and the two women set up camp slowly, all day their movements slow and deliberate - full of regret.  Joxer decided to explore around the camp some.   Trudging through some undergrowth, he found a wide pond, and removing his boots carefully, he let his feet sploosh in the cool fresh water.  He heard a crunch of sticks behind him.  By the step he knew it was Xena - perhaps the hangover had made her careless.

 "What's wrong?"

 The soft voice of the warrior princess soothed his pain.  She was so gentle at times, such a contrast to her seemingy savage nature.

"Yesterday," he said, "Cupid appeared to me just before you guys showed up.  He said Aphrodite had a present for me - it was an arrow.  He shot it at Gabrielle - and now I think she's falling in love with me because of it - and it's all my fault!"

 "Did you ask Cupid to shoot the arrow?" Xena asked, sitting down next to him.

 "No!" Joxer shook his head, instantly regretting it, "I'd never - I love Gabrielle too much to do that to heer!"

 Xena smiled slowly, a supportive hand squeezing his shoulder.

 "We have to do something about it Xena!"

 Xena smirked, slightly amused by the situation.  Here was a man who tried with everything to get her best friend to love him, and now it was the last thing he wanted her to do.

 "First - tell me what the arrow looked like."

 Joxer sighed, "It was a silver one - that's bad isn't it?"

 "It's not good," Xena cocked her head, "Keep going..."

 "And - it had a little red ruby at the tip-"

 A smile flashed across Xena's face, and she wrapped an arm around Joxer tightly.

 "What- what's wrong?"

 "Nothing!" Xena said, "That ruby - it made the arrow totally and utterly useless..."

 Joxer's mouth fell open.

 "You mean-"

 "Whatever happened last night - or this morning - or whatever - is all Gabrielle!"

 Joxer would have falled over if he weren't already on the ground.  Xena stood, patting him on the shoulder, and striding - carefully - to shore.

 Falling backwards in the mud, Joxer gazed at the heavens, a wide grin gracing his face, and punching his arms in the air, he hooted.

 "THANKYOU APHRODITE!!!"

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