112804My dad flung open my bedroom door. �Get up, your cousins are here!� he barked at me. My eyes struggled to adjust to the harsh light bearing down on me from above the closet, and I squinted in his general direction. �Uhhh,� was all I could muster before throwing the covers over my head. �Molly! Get up! Your cousins are here!� he said again, this time emphasizing certain words. After two-and-a-half hours of deep sleep, I couldn�t tell my hand from my foot. The last thing I wanted was to leave my warm blanket cocoon and greet my two cousins and cousin�s fianc�. I kicked my legs as my dad tried to swat at them, attempting to physically remove me from my bed. �DAD!� I screamed, this time verbally upset, �NO! I�ll see them in the morning!� My hyper-sensitive sense of hearing picked up on a male�s voice. At first listen, I pegged the voice to Clayton. But as I focused all of my sleep-deprived energy on the correct answer, my dad pushed the door aside and I noticed a light. A red light. Even through my horrible seven-inch focusing distance, I saw it. �Surprise!� my brother yelled from behind his video camera. Being in complete shock, I rolled my eyes and covered my head with blankets once again. I quickly removed my retainers as to avoid getting my teeth caught in a compromising position on film. My mom and dad laughed from behind him and I thought I heard Ashton Kutcher yell, �You got punked!� I threw the covers back and stared at Jack in disbelief. In front of me stood my brother, the little brat who had told me for two weeks he wasn�t going to make it home for Thanksgiving. I�d moped, I�d complained, I�d told all my friends how depressing the weekend would be without Jack. But here he was, in the flesh�in the flesh with a video camera in my no-makeup, bedhead-hair face. I sprang to my knees and threw my arms around him. I hugged my little brother with all the energy I could muster at 2 a.m. My parents could tell from the look on my face: I was one happy older sister. --- I glanced at the dining room clock: 4:47 a.m. I hugged Jack and told him goodbye, whispering into his ear, �Thanks for coming,� before giving him a final squeeze. Following my cousins and Clayton, he disappeared out the door and into the wee hours of a November morning. The front door slammed shut behind him and I turned to head back to bed. See you soon, little brother. 112204�Hey, Molly, do you want to be dropped off at your car or at Lou�s?� Chris asked from the driver�s seat. I hesitated. Feeling Aly�s stare turn towards me, I knew she and the rest of the vehicle awaited my answer. �Umm, Lou�s is fine,� I stuttered. I nervously glanced around the car, hoping to find something neutral for my gaze to land on. The car came to a stop and I thanked Chris for the ride before hopping onto the pavement. I walked to the trunk and tried unsuccessfully to yank my bag from the stack of clothing. Tugging too hard, I stumbled backwards � and into Lou. �Whoa there,� he said as his hands grabbed at my arms, steadying me. I turned around and rewarded his good deed with a half smile before quickly looking away. Lou picked up his bags, closed the trunk and we headed into the building. �I hope you don�t mind me coming in,� I bashfully said to him. �No, it�s cool,� Lou replied, turning to smile at me. I got instantaneous butterflies, but I rolled my eyes. Someone I met three days ago can�t have this effect on me. It�s physically impossible, like Tad Hamilton having sex with 15, maybe 20 women (note: cheesy movie reference). As we entered Lou�s apartment complex, he opened two of the doors for me. I made a mental note of his chivalry. Ten points for being a gentleman. Inside his place and after a couple minutes of awkwardness, we settled onto the couch. We looked at some photos on his laptop. I inched closer. He turned on the TV. I inched closer. He began twirling his phone by the wrist strap, an accessory that comes with most cell phones, but is frequently thrown away � a sentiment Lou told me the day before. I watched his twirling hand approach my right leg. He was trying to be smooth about it, I concluded. Like clockwork, one of his hands came to rest on one of my legs. I inched closer. He intermittently moved his fingers and each sensation shot through my body, making me snuggle closer to him. After a few minutes of my head on his shoulder, I was ready for more. Not in a porn star way, but in a you-smell-way-too-good-for-me-to-do-nothing way. I crept towards his face, planted a quick kiss on his cheek and sunk back into the couch before he could do anything about it. I happily awaited his next move. From the corner of my eye, I saw Lou turn his head until his eyes bore a hole into my soul. I moved to face him. I never noticed how expressive his blue eyes were before. I couldn�t believe those blue eyes gave me the time of day at the SPJ party. I couldn�t believe those blue eyes now wanted to spend time with me, wanted to sit next to me on the couch, wanted to� He bent his head to mine and our lips came together. There it was again, and this time I knew it wasn�t a passing thing. On a tattered couch, in an old apartment, on a Monday night in front of the 10 o�clock news, I had instantaneous butterflies. 111904I pushed open the door and scanned the living room full of men. Half of them clutched beer cans and bottles; the rest, 40s. A couple of them wore bandanas, carefully placed on their heads to give them the right amount of street credit. Drew stood up and walked towards us. �Drew!� Laura, Sarah and I all screamed in unison. We ran over and hugged the webmaster-turned-thug, decked out in a classy white undershirt, armbands and a tiny bandage under his right eye. Out of nowhere popped Nina and she was greeted with an equal amount of enthusiasm. Clomping into the kitchen in four-inch stilettos, I yanked the refrigerator door open and looked for enough space. No such luck. �Try the freezer,� Laura said from behind me. I opened the chilly abyss to find what looked enough room for a former present receptacle. After slowly sliding in my box of Jell-O shots, I made sure I didn�t disturb the frozen pizzas or pitcher of strawberry daiquiris and made my way into party central. --- Somehow, over the buzz of chatter and rap music in the crowded college apartment, I heard the stereo. The front door flung open and in bounced a baby-blue-velour-suit-wearing gangster with a chain the size of Mount Rushmore around his neck, a gun jutting out from his pants and ghetto fabulous hair. �Where my bitches at?� he yelled. As if on cue, Laura and Sarah stopped what they were doing and ran to Tyler. The three began to grind on one another as cameras flashed from the sidelines. Tyler waved his gun in the air while the other hand held a larger-than-life boom box; M.C. Hammer blasted from its speakers. Cheering erupted from the flabbergasted on-lookers. If there was a contest, Tyler had just won best male costume. --- I sat on the couch, trying not to look bored. I stopped drinking a half an hour before to be sober enough to drive home, so the party suddenly got un-fun from my end. Everyone sat in groups, happily talking and laughing with the people around them. Half of my SPJ cronies were nowhere to be found. The other half danced in front of me, bumping and grinding to the slow jam coming from some kid�s laptop perched on an end table. I rested my head in my hand and scanned the room for someone to talk to. No such luck. The longer I sat, the more I felt like an outcast � an outcast at I party I planned, no less. �Fuck this,� I mumbled to myself and headed for the bathroom. Walking down the hallway, I noticed shadows dancing on the wall. I turned the corner and stumbled upon an impromptu party in itself. �So this is where everyone was hiding,� I said with a smile to the group of j-school students. Laura perched on the sink, with Alison resting on the mirror, while AJ, Rabbi and Lou joked with them. I leaned against the wall and tried to get in on the conversation. I kept glancing at the guys, but none of them picked up my vibes. I tried inching closer to the group, but Alison�s legs cock-blocked me. So there I stood on the wall, hoping for one glance in my general direction. --- Get up and go home, my head screamed at my body. I�d been laying on the couch way longer than planned. There was no harm in staying overnight, right? No Molly, go home, my head kept saying. I turned to let him know of my departure, but before my lips could form the letters, they were wrapped up in a passionate kiss. The arm that wasn�t pinned into the couch grabbed the back of his head and pushed him closer. --- I stuck the key in the ignition and started my car. Turning to throw my purse onto the backseat, I caught my reflection in the rearview mirror. My hair was a mess, my makeup was smudged and my lips were bright red. I laughed at my post-gangster-party image and checked the clock: 4:30 a.m. I smiled, shook my head and put the car in reverse. SPJ sures knows how to party, I thought to myself. "F yeah," I said aloud. 110904It only takes a compliment or two to make your day that much better. 110804I suddenly feel compelled to write. Something is telling me it�s over. I can�t put my finger on it, but when I said good night to Jake, I felt it � or lack of it. Even though it was over the internet, through millions of 1s and 0s, something wasn�t the same. Under normal circumstances, I�d be crying, but an odd calm has come over me. There is no point in me holding out for a what-if situation. It is over, we are over. Done and done. ---
110704Happy one month anniversary of me being single! The exclamation point is meant to be taken sarcastically. 110504As I layed in his arms, I felt a wave of contentment wash over me. It had been a while, but it still felt so right. My arm rested on his chest and I could feel each breath he took. Our legs intertwined on the bed next to a tangled mass of sheets. I nuzzled my head in the crook of his neck, smelling the faint scent of Axe; a scent so innately him. My open eyes glanced at his closed lids and I wondered what he was thinking. It didn�t matter because I knew the thoughts running through mine. Despite the tears, despite running into the arms of another, despite late night AIM conversations, despite ring rash, despite hearts broken again and again�despite everything that�s happened, one thing�s for sure: You�re still the one. 110204It was the end of something simple.
- Dawson's Creek 110104I tried not to think of it; thinking only made me more nervous. I played with the pink straw sticking out of my Long Island, twirling it around the ice cubes in the plastic cup. Looking out over the dance floor from my balcony perch, I surveyed the small crowd. They were gathered in groups, laughing and drinking the night away. I turned back to Rachel and our conversation, but it was hard to keep my focus between glancing at the door every 30 seconds. What was taking so long? Suddenly, a yellow shirt caught my eye. I squinted through the glass front windows, but a bouncer blocked my view of his face. As he walked into the building, his eyes were shielded by a hat, but I knew it was him. I looked at Rachel, my grin encompassing most of my face. �The yellow shirt or the white one?� she questioned. �Yellow,� I immediately told her. �Damn, he looks good tonight.� I rested my arms on the table and leaned in to gossip before he got upstairs. I couldn�t believe how excited I was. We were meeting for a couple of drinks, to hang out, that was it. But why had I spent the last half hour ripping through my wardrobe to find the right amount of class and cleavage in a shirt? Why had I put on the best girly-smelling lotion I owned? Why did I care? I pulled back in time to see her eyes shift behind me. Spinning around, my field of vision came to rest on a yellow shirt, his yellow shirt. �What�s up?� he asked as he pulled up a chair, his roommate settling down next to him. That�s all it took. Two words�and I had butterflies.
|