An Intervention for William
     As of recently, a very dear friend of mine has had a fascination with what he likes to call "crack".  I have become extremely worried with Will, or his online alias, (GodsWill).  He constantly talks about how great "crack" is and how everyone should just get down, make love, and "smoke some crack".  Because I'm a member of C.A.R.E.Club I'm obliged to care, but regardless, I want to stop Will before he goes any further in his downward spiral.  WILLIAM!! This is for you... Please stop doing, or talking, or pretending to do, or pretending to talk about "crack".  It's destroying our relationship and your relationship with unicorns and pink ponies.  Please, for the love of sweet delicious pork, stop doing this to us.
Tell all your friends to join us for William's intervention, it is a very worthy cause.  Plus free milk and cookies.
                                                         -Management
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