JOSHUA STENDER
Name: Josh Stender
Nicknames: The Great White Hope, Yoshi, R. Chavez
Year/Major: Graduate Student in the Department of Stuctural and Cellular Biology
College: University of Illinois
Bio: A graduate student whom I have met on the basketball court. Possesses a sweet jump shot and constantly giving me divine wisdom about how I can be like him. A workout person who has been found kissing his cherry size biceps each time he flexes them in front of the ladies. Often gets a wicked buzz from cough syrup. A fairly intelligent person who lectures me on how a person can jog backwards and gain weight. Tried to sniff coke once, but ice cubes got caught in his nose. Constantly blasting ice cream truck music out of his truck to people who piss him off on the road. Wanted to puke he got word that Janet Reno was going to be the new Maytag Repair Man. Always making fun of bald people because he thinks they are human flashlights. Wondering if someone could run for President from prison. Trying to urge managers of local stores to have a sale where you get a free car adapter for a breast pump you purchase. Creator and founder of the "Father Milk" and believes that "Father Milk" can only be produced by albano Mongolians like himself. Founder and chairman of the US Open of pimping.
