It all started one weekend back at the Loo (Waterloo) I made the two-hour one way trip to get The Beer Cup from Smoky's house, an maybe have a drink or two in the process, you know how we do it.
Riebs and April made the trip down to Rolla on Saturday, which coincided with Big Bad Tad Chaake's last game.
Unfortunately, we got too wasted at Smoky's the night before that we totally missed the game.
But, we showed up in time for the after-game festivities. I came prepared, I brought a nice looking beer mug and of course, The Beer Cup. As I strolled on up to Dan and Chad's house, I had to look around to make sure that I was at the right house, becuase there were a bunch of little kids running around and it looked like an entire family had moved in to the house, there was a guy grilling brats outside and everything.
Once I made it into the house, all was forgotten, Jarv and Juan showed up to party.
We started the night off right, with a good, old-fashioned card game of hockey. This hard-fought game featured "The Lou Del Losers," Juan, Taake, and company, versus "The Outsiders," Jarv, Lutz, Double D, and other fellow beer drinkers who didn't live in "The Del." Cheating was encouraged, and with Snatch acting as "my eye in the sky." The Outsiders were victorious over the Lou Del Losers with a score of about 15 to 5. We got so drunk, though, we were only able to play one period. A game of Cirle of Death was next, and when the Rhyme Time card was picked, a guy started the rhyme with the sentence: "I've never had sex with a prostitute on my route." I needed a napkin to clean the beer out my nose I was laughing so hard.
After the Circle of Death, everyone was pretty much wasted, and things got a little crazy. I got up to do a Beer Bong with the Magical Don Juan, and I knocked over a table with about five decks of cards on it. After half of an hour of cleaning up that shenanigan, someone got out a red marker, and I let Dan's sister write the "prostitute phrase" on my arm, and I let April write "Property of April on my arm," what can I say, I'm a sucker for a chick, or in April's case, a promise that I would see pictures of her and her roomate in their underwear...
I'm still waiting for my pictures April.
Speaking of April, I was shocked to learn that she had never had a beer in her life. I decided to introduce her to beer in the best way possible, out of The Beer Cup. After she bonged one proper, Dan loaded another one up, and positioned it kind of... well, a picture says a thousand words:
Awesome.
After having about another case and a half of beer, Dan decided to try his hand at knifethrowing in... his garage. He was throwing the knife at a shooting target on the wall, and I was impressed with his accuracy, he was pretty much one-hit-one-kill with that thing.
There were some music playing from Dan's computer upstairs and System of a Down came on, which meant only one thing...
Something was going to get fucked up.
The target on that night was a plastic lawn chair that had a broken arm. Dan made quick work of the chair, by slamming it against the wall. Everyone took turns beating the shit out of that chair. I opted for the classic "Bang Bang" elbow drop.
We then made our way to a kegger, where April, still feeling the effects of the good old Beer Cup, spent most of the party throwing up. When we returned to the house, Jarv capped off the night quite nicely by ripping the handrail out of the wall on his way down the stairs.
All in all, another classy night in Rolla.