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| Most human contact is with those under 2 feet tall. Most female contact is either their own mothers, the grocery clerk, the other moms in the neighborhood, etc. And those people are important to her, don't get me wrong. They are a part of her daily life for sure! But there is still that part of her that only her hubby can fill! Just as there are parts of her that only contact with her friends can fill. And her job. Etc....get my drift? These are the years when she is pulled in many directions. Mom ~ Wife ~ Employee (if she works a paying job) ~ Friend ~ Daughter ~ Etc. As a mom she has her offspring fully dependant upon her...demanding her attention 24/7. Her nurturing hormones and instincts are at their peak. Working to raise the kids to be responsible members of society. Maybe not perfectly...making mistakes as any human does...afterall, where IS the parenting manual anyway??? But nonetheless, she is being demanded on by those little ones who do not fulfill the things she needs as a woman. PLEASE NOTE~ Yes, they DO fulfill places of her heart as a MOM...no doubt about that for sure! But, a woman's emotional needs are NOT met by her children, nor are they met by her husband. What she needs is her emotional needs nourished by her husband! |
| So what are a woman's emotional needs you ask? First of all, her spiritual walk...then by her confidence in her femininity (her womanhood - her role in this world - her place in her family - etc)...the finding and nurturing of her talents (and I don't mean the talent of 'juggling' a couple grocery bags while she has a 2 year old by the hand either!) ...time to spend with her peers, etc. |
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| These are times when the lace negligee's get pushed to the back of the drawer to make room for those comfy 'easy-to-be-washed' or 'its-okay-to-be-barfed-on' flannels and sweats! The sweet smelling enticing perfumes are replaced with anti-bacterial soaps and lotions for those dish-pan hands. Now please do not get the impression that all women go around in curlers and a house coat with cold cream on their faces! No way! Not all femininity is lost. But the point I am trying to make fellas is that a woman pushes over those things that make her the desirable target of your affections...and maybe even you to the back as well...unintentionally....because face it....those little ones that are the result of one of those hot nights when she did wear that sexy little number are taking almost all her energies!! (Even as the kids get older the demands do not subside!) So, please be understanding...well...sorry guys I guess understanding might be the wrong word - no offence. If you can't totally understand...than please be accepting of this time in her life and be communicative with her. And I would like to interject here that sometimes guys...WE don't even totally understand why we can break out in tears at a seemingly small thing...or get mad at something one time and not another. Hey we gotta live with these raging hormones...if you don't think it gets confusing and frustrating for us you are wrong!!! So shut off the "Oh no I gotta fix her" mode and just hold her...tell her you love her...or sometimes just take the kiddo's and back off!! Let her have some time alone to grasp those thoughts of hers that are scattered ~ to gather her wits and compose herself. As social as women are we really treasure time alone to re-group and re-energize. Bring her home some sexy underthingy's......she may be surprised at first, maybe even look horrified! (Especially if you have never done it before!!!) But she will begin to appreciate it after awhile. Or take her shopping for them and pick things out together. |
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| I can assure you that if you begin to do little things for her such as those things listed below...you will reap great rewards. And I don't mean those rewards that come under the sheets necessarily guys...but satisfaction that you showed her you love her. Those other rewards are the icing on the cake... |
| And PLEASE guys....bringing home those things is NOT an invitation to try to create another one of those little blessings running around your house! It should be your recognition of the fact that you still see her as a sexy vibrant woman. Let her reward you for the gift with her advances.....don't just expect and take! That is demeaning to a person to be expected to 'perform' for gifts. And the more you expect and take the less she will desire to give!!! Trust me!!! If the truth be told guys you are the same way...the more someone 'expects' something emotional from you the less you want to express it. Am I right? |
| And by the way...women like gifts ~large or small~ from her man for the simple reason that he strained some of his brain cells to actually think of what to buy...go buy it and give it to her. Its not necessarily the gift itself guys...its the effort taken. |
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| Write up or purchase a gift certificate for a backrub or body massage, (from you of course! :-)) |
| Write a note to her and leave it on the mirror or dresser or even tucked into her purse to find later ~ and not a note about the dry cleaning you need picked up either! |
| Now don't think you have to do these types of things every day...then they become mundane and expected. Once a week or every other week for the 'big' things is great. The 'little' things on the other hand can be 1 or 2 times a week. Remember...these are guidelines. Let your imagination go and do things you know your special lady would like. You will find that she will reciprocate similar things for you. |
| Now is the time for someone else to give their input...I am not in my Winter yet, so I will leave this season alone for now until I get some feedback from others who are. |
| (At least I think I am kidding! Hee hee) |
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| While she is doing the dishes whisper in her ear that she really turns you on. And leave it at that. Just letting her know she stimulates you will stimulate her!! |
| Call her from work and ask her how her day is going. Offer to bring home a bucket of chicken or pizza so she can have the night off from cooking. |
| :-) |
| Well on to the Winter....the time when the kids are leaving or gone already. |
| Now what? |
| Who is there to demand her time? |
| Her energies? |
| Oh my....its YOU !! |
| Gasp! (Just kidding around guys :-)) |
| Hints & Ideas.... |
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| Fall....the longest hardest season of a woman's life....married....children....maybe a job outside the home or perhaps a 'stay-at-home' mom. |
| Summer........finding that 'Mr.. Right'. The dating has narrowed down to perhaps just one guy. Becoming more interested in settling down. |
| Spring........the early years of becoming an adult. No longer in High School. Possibly in college or at a steady job, usually out on their own. A time of discovering themselves. FUNNNNNN!!!!!! |
| Please...this is a source of information to help you to hopefully understand a little bit better what makes a woman 'tick''. |
| This is not to belittle you or make you feel like women think you are stupid. |
| Okay guys...here is a page just for you. |
| Offer to get her a drink while you watch your favorite t.v. show together... she ain't your waitress either! |
| Clean out the bathroom sink after you tuned up the car or trimmed your beard..she ain't your maid honey! |
| Take your own dirty laundry to the washer. She will appreciate it greatly. |
| Send her a funny, or romantic email. Send it to her work if it is allowed! Don't get her in trouble though...some places of work monitor email of their employees. |
| Write a note to her telling her the things about her you appreciate. Cut the note up like a jig-saw puzzle and mail it to her. |
| Wink at her from across the dinner table. Maybe play a little 'footsie' with her. The kids will wonder why mom is smirking. Hee hee. |
| When you are on your way driving somewhere together stop at a grocery store or any store that has those silly gum-ball and toy machines and buy her a silly trinket from one of them. Yeah...she may think you are nuts...but tell her you are nuts...for HER!! |
| Run a bubble bath for her and keep the kids occupied or put them to bed so she can have a time of peace in the bathroom. Do you know how rare and precious it is for a woman to be in the bathroom and NOT have the kids knocking at the door? Well let me tell you, it is!!! And you leave her alone too silly! Unless of course she invites you to join her :-). |
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| * I will gladly post ideas and comments from the emails I receive but I do not respond to the emails nor do I give advice on personal issues. |
| Disclaimer: Please remember that the ideas expressed in this web page are strictly my own ideas and are meant as a guideline not absolutes.* |
| Just a bit of a note interjected here...If your kids see you do these things for your wife...they will learn so much about what love really is and what it means to serve one another. Their spouses will thank you later...trust me. Get the kids involved in doing some of these things also. |
| Ok guys......Here goes :-) |
| Women go through 'SEASONS ' - |
| Instead of t.v. ~ turn on the stereo and ask her to dance. |
| And the list can go on and on....so strain those brain cells guys and start thinking of ideas!! |
| They are gleaned from years of experience as a woman :-). |
| M-Kay |
| Fall: |
| Most conversations involve bodily functions or the lack thereof! What to make for dinner ~ 'mac n cheese' or filet mingnon??? Hmm hard to decide! Laundry What on earth takes out a mixture of mud and ketchup from the tablecloth? And what were they making and where did it go?? Dishes Hmm how did that frog get in the dishwasher anyway? Ewwww Etc.... |
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