|
All these could be encouraging signs if I had any confidence at all. But, like I say, she'd never settle for a guy like me. Yes, I'm thoughtful, semi-intelligent, very loving, and not so bad-looking for 41. Yet, at the same time I'm as broke as broke can be and am moving almost 200 miles away in two weeks. She truly has the pick of any man she could want, and I know she'll take the time to choose more wisely. At 24, she hasn't even faced the prime of her life yet, and will more than likely be with someone closer to her own age, better looking than me, more successful than me, and with a brighter future than mine. My god, I feel so old, and the loneliness is unbearable. Meanwhile, I sit listlessly, knowing I've so much to accomplish, yet wondering when I'll actually get it all started. Writing here seems a waste of time, but perhaps it's getting through how soon I need to begin. Hopefully the next time I write I really will have something positive to say, some personal triumph to share. |