This is written in third person, because being sarcastic about yourself in first person sounds too much like self-pity. You know what I mean - it's easier to say that someone else is a incompetent fool, isn't it?

The band did not perform as such, but merely coagulated disparate sounds into an avant-garde, post-modern, experimental sound collage (i.e. unlistenable noise). They managed to produce a concept album, 'Random Synthetics', which may have contained fleeting acquaintances with original melody.

After the incident involving the contact between Lee's fist and school window, the band was put on hold. When it re-formed, it had radically altered, losing Lee Greenwood and Matt Sealey to the evils of rock'n'roll excess. A church hall became the new rehearsal room, and Mark experimented with singing for the first time. This was an event on par with Dylan going electric, or The Grateful Dead playing a two minute pop ditty. The fanbase was shocked and outraged. Previously, Mark had stated that singing was not necessary, that all could be said through melody and music. This was actually an excuse for not being able to sing. Still, loins girded up, he took to the microphone.

Needless to say, early recordings demonstrate that this was a mistake. The band were lucky in not having a fanbase, or indeed anyone else who was remotely interested in their noise. This gave them the opportunity to develop a sound of their own, a personality to their music, indeed. Their style was simplicity, constrained by the minimal knowledge of chords within the group. Gareth moved onto live drums, Mark limited himself to guitar and vocals. Soon, they were ready to play...

AudioTherapy limped on until late 1995, when efforts to expand the band collapsed. The band was gracefully laid to rest.

12th May 1995    - Main Hall, Kingsdown School
                              Drugged, Big Brother, Inside The Wall.

After the collapse of AudioTherapy, Mark searched desperately to fill the void in his life. Although turning to drink and drugs was an option, it was expensive and involved too much effort. Instead, salvation appeared in the form of a band who, seconds before they took the stage, settled on the name BSE.

BSE were a short lived experiment in noise that existed solely in a locked, soundproof cupboard. They attempted to forge their bid for pop domination in the early months of 1996. Emerging, blinking like moles, into the stage lights in March 1996, they played a very bad, out of tune set to a disinterested audience. They promptly disbanded.

BSE, Rest In Noise..

During this lean period, Mark survived on what little scraps he could find. Playing rhythm guitar on one song with a covers band here, taking part in a production of Grease that got cancelled there. All the while he was building a comprehensive catalogue of what could nearly be called songs.

A band appeared from nowhere in early 1997, only to stumble along with no songs, no name, nowhere to practice and no motivation. So nothing happened...

(That's where I would put the word 'until', but that would be fairly obvious.)

Mention the name 'Mantis' to a select few, and dim sparks may be kindled in their memories. The best way of describing the group would be as 'a band that had a large amount of unexplored potential'. Although there was talent aplenty, the combination just didn't work to its strengths. Plus they had a very badly dressed frontman.

Mark Hitchins - Vocals, Bass.
Graham Ward - Lead Guitar.
Tim Wardle - Rhythm Guitar.
Brian Webber - Keyboard.
Tim Rushforth - Drums.

Mantis were formed through the Exeter University Campus Bands society in October 1997. Soon they were booked to play a Christmas party at the beginning of December. Rehearsals went well, the band mastering songs at a remarkable rate. A forty five minute set was developed, containing mainly original material plus a smattering of covers. The first gig was a success (not everybody walked away with their fingers in their ears, gibbering), considering that the band was only a month old.

Three gigs were booked for the following February, and rehearsals continued at pace. The first gig was in 'The Bowling Green' in Exeter, supporting the band 'Bad Hair Day'. The first time Mantis had ventured outside their home turf, it was a nervous affair. This was followed by a gig in the Exeter Cavern Club, supporting Itch, Bad Hair Day and Jobe. Mantis's set demonstrated that music, not performance, was their strong point. The third gig in February was to make up the numbers in the Battle Of The Bands (held in 'The Bowling Green'), that contest ubiquitous to American teen movies, and student bands. Again, a solid performance marked them as talented, but not yet contenders.

Drama! There was a problem! After listening to tape recordings of their gigs, Mantis realised that Mark was one of those people blessed with a voice that didn't seem out of tune at the time, but appeared to wander out of tune on playback. He protested, claiming that he knew he was in tune. It was pointed out that he may have been in tune, but no-one was sure what he was in tune with, because it wasn't any of the rest of the band. After further analysis it was decided that the problem was the high notes. Therefore the band's songs were transposed to allow the songs to be sung in a different key. Before this could happen fully, the band ended their second university term with playing an Easter party. Again, no drinks or abuse were thrown, but the band failed to be at all memorable. They were, in fact, upstaged by the other band playing that night, called 'Moon Balloon'.

At the beginning of the third term, it happened. It is that moment that the band realise that they are playing the song. The one that will make them famous. For Mantis, the song was called 'Stay'. Although the lyrics are somewhat obscure, it seems to be a skewed view of claustrophobia*.

During the summer of 1998, Mantis went into the recording studio, emerging with a three track tape. In true cheapskate fashion, the tracks had been mixed with about half an hour of studio time remaining, so it had that wonderful amateurish sheen.

Little did they know that there were dark clouds upon that summer horizon...

Actually, there wasn't any high drama in the end of the band. A return to university in September heralded a lack of interest in the band from all members. Tim Wardle threw himself into windsurfing, Tim Rushforth hurled himself into bed, Brian hurled himself into Bad Hair Day, Graham concentrated on his work, and Mark was looking for a different kind of band. One that would involve the opportunity to dress stupidly, and indulge his passion for silliness and folk music. There could only be one name for that kind of band...but that is another story.

3rd February, 1998    -    The Bowling Green, Exeter.
Originals: I Will Believe, Yesterday, Lazy Song, Heal Me, Monochrome.
Covers: Good Times, She Bands The Drums.

17th February, 1998    -    The Cavern, Exeter.
As above.

24th February, 1998    -    The Bowling Green.
As above.

Sometime in March 1998    -    Boot Bar, Birks Halls.
As above, plus a few that I can't remember.

16th May, 1998    -    Boot Bar, Birks Halls.
Originals: Elastic Summertime, Stay, Heal Me, Monochrome.
Cover: Staying Out For The Summer.

August 1998    -    (Unnamed Recording)
                             Stay, Elastic Summertime, Heal Me.