Perception

Blind

Long ago, anger burnt inside me welling up like a foul trench of flames. It consumed my flesh, every thought; it even hopelessly corrupted my soul. No word I spoke was uttered without this stench. I despised hearing others talk, for it brought to mind every ulterior motive I could hatefully accuse. My life was plagued; what release could I find. Was there anything other than fatality to free me? I didn’t understand that I needed to just let it all go. I had no reason to perceive my anger as the problem instead of everyone else I felt inundated with. I knew nothing better, so I plotted with diligence my own collapse.

A small bright light shone on me through my night. An elderly couple showed me the love of a truth filled family, inviting me into their home, and an attractive girl who’s beauty alone I wasn't attracted to; instead I was drawn like a fish on a hook to her undeniable joyfulness. A purity I can’t comprehend enough to realize, and equally cannot deny. This light, however inconceivable, was God showing His love to me. This splinter of hope was all my life saw worth living a while longer.

My ignorance of freedom wouldn't last. That minuscule trickle of light would soon find the keystone of my hard heart, and destroy the dam of my conceptual mind, which held every essence of real life from my grasp. This day I’m mentioning can be described no better than when I was born again. As if I weren’t breathing before and had long since suffocated, this very moment, this indescribable instant completely removed my every burden. In a burst I felt what it was like to really be alive.

This immediate conversion was nothing less than a deliberate act of a very real God. A spirit of freedom replaced this mountainous sized weight bearing down on me. The more I learn to accept this unique property of salvation, the better and more enjoyable my life becomes. It seems a continuous fountain of words couldn’t describe this enough to show anyone what it is like. Instead all I can say is: the Word of God lives in me, trying to teaching me right from wrong in real time.

Matt (3:11), Mark (1:8), Luke (3:16), John (1:15, 33, 3:16, 14:13, 17), Acts (1:5, 11:16), Rom (11:18), 1 Cor (2:14), 2 Cor (3:3), Gal (5:22, 23), Eph (1:17), 1 Tim (5:21), 1 John (4:6)