ONE-LINERS.......

 > > > > What do you say to a virgin when she sneezes? 

                Goes-in-tight

> > > > What does a 72-year-old snatch taste like?

                Depends.

 > > > > What's "68"?

                 You do me and I owe you one.

 > > > > What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?

                 Gagged!

> > > > What do you call a man who cries while he masturbates?

              A tear-jerker.

> > > > What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive?

               Popeye almost killed > him

> > > > Why do they say that eating yogurt and oysters will improve your sex life?

             Because if you'll eat that stuff, you'll  eat anything.

 > > > > How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb?

              Just one, but it  takes the entire emergency room to get it out!

> > > > What's the definition of a teenager?

               God's punishment for enjoying sex.

> > > > What's the definition of a vagina?

              the box a penis comes in

> > > > What two words will clear out a men's restroom?

              "Nice Dick!"

 > > > > What do you call a truckload of vibrators?

                Toys for Twats.

> > > > What do you call kinky sex with chocolate?

               S&M&M.

 > > > > Why do we have orgasms?

               How else would we know when to stop?

 > > > > What's the definition of indefinitely?

                When your balls are slapping up  against her ass, you're In...definitely!

 > > > > Define Transvestite:

               A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary

 > > > > What do a dildo and soy beans have in common?

               They are both used as substitute meat.

> > > > What do you call kids born in whorehouses?

               Brothel sprouts.

> > > > What is every Amish woman's private fantasy?

             Two Mennonite!

 > > > > What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner?

               The cold shoulder.

 > > > > How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?

               His hand caught fire.

> > > > Why is sex like a game of bridge?

              If you have a good hand, you don't need a > partner.

 > > > > What do you call a smiling Roman with pubic hair between his teeth?

               Gladiator!

 > > > > Why do you get paid more at the Sperm Bank than at the Blood Bank?

                Sperm is handmade

> > > > How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?

                 Put a nipple on it.

 > > > > What should you do if you girlfriend starts smoking?

                Slow down and use a  lubricant.

 > > > > If Eve wore a fig leaf, what did Adam wear?

                A hole in it.

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