Ah, the expert level. After being able to play the game for five whole minutes i'm already a Minesweeper sellout.
Well here's that screen i used to click until something blew my legs off. The first thing you've gotta do is click. I don't think it's actually possible to hit something on the first strike so you've just gotta hope you hit one fo those squares which reveal a cluster of numbers.
Well whaddayaknow, i got a cluster on my first strike without restarting the game over and over again trying to get me one of these babies so i could look supersmooth on my website. I swear!
So what the heck are these numbers. Here's the deal, if a square has a number two in it, there are two mines in the surrounding squares, you just have to use the numbers in the squares around it to figure out which ones.
Right click on the square you think might just send you the way of the dodos and some kind of a flag will be left there. When all the mines are flagged you win, and if you're anything like me you'll celebrate with a small butter-churning dance or maybe by throwing your hands up in the air and waving them like you just don't care.
Now that you're the king of minesweeper you'll probably never ever see this horrible scene again, the mines, the dead smiley, the horror.
Umm ... i realised halfway through writing this that there's a help topic on the game which explains it all perfectly well. My brain hurts. Where's my juicebox?