| I sat down on my bed, looking dejectedly out of the window. I felt like crying. I wanted to cry actually, but my eyes had run out of tears. How could he had done something like this to me? I needed him so much. I wanted to be in his arms so badly. But no, he never really cared for me. If he did, he would have stayed. He would have realized how badly I needed him. He wouldn't have broken up with me. I was hard to say that he broke up with me when we were never really going out, but saying that he didn't like me anymore was the same thing. He hurt me. And now I was suffering from a broken heart. I stood and walked to the window. Today had been a gloomy January day. The gray clouds promised rain, hanging lazily overhead as if sleeping until they felt like waking up. And in the distance, I could see a brake in the clouds. Sunlight was shining through the break, casting heavenly rays onto the world below. I sat there for who knows how long, watching the clouds move. And before long, a single ray of sunshine, the last strand of hope, stretched out from behind the clouds. And not long after that, the clouds won and the break was gone. The burst of sunshine had succumbed to the dull gray. I felt like calling into the silence, "Why? Why have You left me?" But I remained silent. Then the clouds started to cry. It was as if they were crying with me. And at that point, I was helpless. I broke down and cried. My tearless eyes released tears I hadn't thought I had. I fell to the floor and buried my face in my hands. I released the hurt, the pain, the agony. And yet my heart still wasn't mended. It felt as if it never would. There was no one to turn to. I was alone, utterly alone in a world of billions of people. There was no shoulder to cry on, no friend to talk to. With him gone, I was no longer whole. I was no longer special. I was no longer cared for. Even if I did have an available shoulder, the shoulder would turn cold because no one cared enough to sacrifice it. I continued to cry. How long I cried, I do not know. I just know I cried until the rain stopped. When it grew quieter, I forced myself to stand up and look back out the window. The rain had ceased and the clouds were starting to part. A few hopeful rays of sunshine peeked out from behind the clouds, boldly, but hesitant at the same time. They shined down from heaven to the twisted world below. What was I thinking? I wasn't alone. I wiped a stray tear away from my cheek. Maybe there was hope. |
| Broken |