Disclaimer:
Nie, Beyblade nie jest moj¹ w³asnoœci¹. (Got bored with saying what we all know in English, wrote it in Polish
instead.)
***
Feelin’ Blue
***
It was one of those days, when you feel
miserable and lonely for Kai – as if nobody cared if you dropped dead this
moment. Various people have different ways of dealing with feeling down – some
play games, others go shopping and some go to talk with their friend to name
some examples. Kai did none of this – he only sat at the entrance of the
Kinomiya dojo and stared at the pond – which didn’t help at all.
It was idiotic – he stayed at the place which
made him feel worse. But than the empty mansion wasn’t an option either. He
closed his eyes trying to force an image of a certain person out of his mind.
To no avail.
Why him – out of all people? He didn’t
understand what he was feeling, he hadn’t figured out how it was to be a friend
yet and now this! How come? He wasn’t ready yet and, besides, would he love him? Sure, he treated him always
like a friend, but… what if it was only friendship? What if he didn’t need anything more from him?
And why should he care for Kai so
much, anyway? The garnet-eyed ‘blader wasn’t exactly the first person, who you
could love. Have a crush on – sure. But love? When his own grandfather didn’t
give a damn, why would anybody else?
“Hey Kai!” he heard Takao’s voice and felt the
tanned boy’s hand grab his wrist. He was not going to show he was upset. He was
not. “Come on! I have something important to tell you!”
The dual-haired teenager felt his heart jump
up.
Don’t
hope. he mentally scolded himself. You’ll
end up disappointed, if you start to.
He continued to repeat the fraise “don’t hope”
in his mind as the blue-eyed teen dragged him to his room. But it didn’t help –
it only made him feel even worse. Why did Takao have to show up? It wasn’t as
if he really was going to make him any better. That mood would go away sooner
or later – it’s not as he was really depressed. But right now he was feeling
much more miserable and it was Kinomiya’s fault… even if he didn’t know it.
They entered the blue-eyed boy’s room – Kai
had to wonder, how such a chaotic person managed to keep it reasonably clean –
and the smaller boy made his captain sit down on his bed, saying he doesn’t
want him to do one of those anime-style falls.
He
doesn’t mean what you want him to. He has no idea. Don’t be silly, Hiwatari.
“Do you know who I like the most?” the tanned
‘blader asked, smiling brightly and seductively?..
Stop! I
know it’s not me… Just stop.
Kai closed his eyes, dropping has
head. Only a moment later he felt a hand touch his chin and lift his face.
“Look at me, Kai.” Takao’s voice sounded
urgent and hurt?.. The pale teenager felt something wet slide down his cheek.
Why did he have to act weak now? It wasn’t what he should do – he shouldn’t
care or at least show he did. He forced his eyelids tighter. He wouldn’t stop
bawling like some brat. But the more tears escaped, even though he really tried
to stop them.
Unexpectedly, he felt Takao hug him and press
his face into the fabric of his yellow T-shirt. Why wasn’t the other boy
telling him to stop? Wasn’t crying a weakness? Wasn’t weakness bad?
“Shh… It’s okay.” The younger boy started
slowly rubbing Kai’s back. “I won’t tell anyone, you don’t have to hide your
feelings.”
There was so much more meaning in those words.
They guaranteed him the safety and acceptance he never knew before. He wouldn’t
be alone anymore. No feeling of emptiness in his heart would plague him.
Kai wrapped his arms around Takao’s waist and
buried his face deeper, desperate sobs escaping his lips. He was shivering, but
for the first time in his life he didn’t feel ashamed of his tears.
He heard Takao murmur something, but he didn’t
hear the words. Their tune was enough to soothe the pain. It filled the empty
place in his heart – made the feelings of loneliness and alienation disappear.
Slowly the garnet-eyed youth calmed down. His
breathing was still hitched and he kept his face buried in Takao’s tee, even
though he wasn’t crying anymore. Gently, the blunette tried to unwrap Kai’s
arms, but the dual-haired adolescent grabbed his T-shirt firmer.
“I’m not going away.” The blue-eyed teen squatted,
so he was facing his captain. He took Kai’s hand in one of his, while the other
traveled upwards so he was gently tracing the line of the other blader’s
cheekbone. “You didn’t know, I like you most?”
Their faces were so near that their noses were
almost touching.
“So you probably don’t know how much I like you?”
“You don’t?..” the slate-haired ‘blader
hesitated. It was all too beautiful to be true. “Do you… love… me?..” he
whispered the last two words. Takao’s
eyes lit up and he brushed his lips gently against Kai’s. The older teen
pressed his lips harder and opened his mouth invitingly. The blue-haired teen
didn’t need more – his tongue slipped and started exploring the older teen’s
mouth.
It wasn’t only pleasant – it felt as if the
blunette was giving him the life and warmth which was missing in him. He didn’t
want to stop, but they needed air and he pulled back.
“I love you too…” the garnet-eyed adolescent
hardly believed he managed to say this. Takao grinned at him and sat next to
him. The tanned ‘blader placed his hand on Kai’s arm and the pale teen placed
his head on the blunette’s shoulder. He was tired.
“I should have expected you’d think it’s not
you.” Takao said, as he started to rub the other boy’s arm. “You’re really a
tragedy when it comes to feelings.”
“I…” the dual-haired teenager started, but the
younger boy didn’t let him finish.
“Never mind. You know I talk first and think
later.”
Kai closed his eyes and yawned, feeling safe
and loved.
“Go to sleep. I’ll be there.”
The taller youth nuzzled closer. His last
thought was that he was making up for the time in his childhood, when nobody
would hug him, as he went to sleep.
***
A/N
Moi is feeling fluffy and TyKaish… And since
I found a beta, who likes yaoi there is something more than the usual hints.
Thank you, Arashi! ^^