Disclaimer: No, I don’t own Beyblade. If I did Redhead
would appear a lot more often… Not
to mention other things would happen.
I’m using
Japanese names:
Boris =
Takao =
Tyson
BBA Team =
Bladebreakers
***
Disturbed
***
“All in all you’re
just another brick in the wall. (…)”
(Pink Floyd “Another Brick in the Wall”)
He’s looking at me again. I know he is. It
gives my shivers – and not pleasant ones. Whenever I think those emotionless
dead eyes are focused on me I start to feel uneasy.
Yes, I did say his eyes are dead. He is dead – breathing, eating, walking but dead… Dead inside. He
doesn’t realize, but it’s the truth. You can’t live without feelings – you can
lock them up, you can hide them – but when they disappear you die with them.
What is left of him is not human anymore. What
human enjoys hurting others so much? I should rather say torturing than
hurting. He gives me the creeps. I wouldn’t want to live like that.
He’s the only one who survived that training – the one which was
supposed to make emotionless, I mean. We all got punished for showing weakness,
but not to that extent. Me, Sergey and Ivan – we aren’t emotionless. But he is.
Truly without emotions. Empty inside.
You know how they usually found out one those
kids couldn’t take the pressure? Suicide. Over the half of them took their
lives. Rest got killed during the training. Except for one – the strongest.
Survival of the fittest one could say. I bet
No, that’s not right. You can’t stay normal
after such treatment. Either you commit suicide or give in. What was supposed
to make you strong, makes you weak in the end.
Look at the BBA Team – from what we were
thought they are weak. So how can they win? But they do. Besides I can tell
when I see strength – and I saw it in those kids. That annoying Kai Hiwatari,
the seemingly careless Takao, the cat-boy Rei and that ever-cheerful Max. Yes,
they had strength and they had something to fuel it. Friendship...
I bet they’d
flip out if they heard that. And he would say there’s no such thing as friendship.
It’s his way of dealing with defeat – he doesn’t know, how to learn from it, so
he finds excuses.
It was damn hard to accept – loosing, I mean.
But I realized something thanks to that. What we were thought all our lives was
lie – all of it. Strength as we were thought is weakness. How can you fight if
you don’t have anything worthwhile to fight for.
What is worthwhile for you, Falcon? Is there
anything like that – anything you wouldn’t want to destroy? I guess not. Dead
people don’t care after all…
How could we let them do this to us? How on
Earth could we listen to all those lies and buy them? I know I’m not stupid,
but I believed them. Isn’t it natural for a child to believe what adults say?
And they lied. All what they said were lies.
Can’t he stop?! I don’t want him to look at
me! Maybe if I knew what he is thinking?.. But I guess, I’m better off when I
don’t. I hardly believe any of it would be pleasant.
Go away Boris. I know what you want from me
and I’m not going to give to you. Ever. I’m not going to be your toy. I’ve been
one whole my life and intend to end this.
***