| Started June 19th 2007
, posted June 23rd 2007. Important! This story is an alternate version of events for the episode �Attached�. Before you read, please note that in this scenario, the Enterprise has been unable to beam minister Lorin up to the ship and have yet no way of finding the captain and doctor. In My Mind�s Eye by Missbevcrusher Their feet pummeled the dry ground beneath them, creating a slight rise of dust. As they ran, they did their best to keep their hurried pace constant. �Are they still gaining on us?� �I believe so.� As the two officers ran, no one could have heard their conversation because it wasn�t an audible one. Captain Jean-Luc Picard and Doctor Beverly Crusher had been abducted when they had tried to beam down to the Kes side of the planet Kesprytt. The Prytt had been the culprit. Fearing that their enemies, the Kes, were going to establish a military alliance with the federation, they had decided to hold the two Starfleet officers captive in order to gather information from them. The Prytt, a very paranoid people, had a very unusual way of interrogating people. They would implant psi-wave devices in the cerebral cortexes of their captives and would ultimately be able to read their thoughts. At first, it had been awkward. Now however, it felt almost natural. �Hurry!� Picard�s voice echoed in Crusher�s mind. �That�s what I�m doing! I can�t go any faster, Jean-Luc.� Although Beverly was in excellent physical shape, Prytt operatives had pursued them closely for for quite a while and fatigue now crept up up on her. She focused on her breathing, trying to keep it steady and controlled. Her cheeks felt hot and she was perspiring quite a bit. �The border�s just up ahead.� �Finally.� When they got up to the barrier, Beverly scanned it and concluded that she could in fact create a temporary opening using her tricorder. �They�re gaining on us.� This time, Jean-Luc�s statement had been spoken out loud. �I�m working as fast as I can,� replied Beverly as she frantically tried to enter the correct commands into her tricorder. As Jean-Luc surveyed the upper portion of the barrier, he failed to immediately notice the opening that had appeared before him. Before he knew it, Beverly�s thoughts invaded his with urgency and she pushed him forward with her hand. �Go!� She�d pushed him across the force-field just in time. To his horror, however, Jean-Luc realized that the opening had immediately sealed up behind him and Beverly was still on the other side. At that moment, he felt utterly powerless, utterly useless. �Dear god�� was all that came to mind. On the other side of the barrier, Beverly looked over her shoulder at the approaching Prytt officers. It was too late. Then turning back toward him, she gave him a look of disbelief. She hadn�t made it across. Despite being horrified at the prospect of being recaptured, she was grateful the captain had made it to the other side. When the Prytt finally got to her and seized her, Jean-Luc�s voice echoed once more in her mind, �Beverly�� One of the Prytt officers immediately tapped his commbadge and said, �Alpha team to Minister Lorin� �Go ahead,� replied the sharp voice of the Prytt minister. �We have the human female. The male is standing in Kes territory.� There was an obvious pause as the minister took in that piece of information. Undoubtedly, it was not the scenario she had been hoping for, but in the end, it was better than nothing. �Understood. Bring her in immediately.� �What about the male, Minister?� �It�s too late, now. We�ll have to leave him. I�m confident we�ll get what we need from the female. Lorin out.� As Beverly stood there, she could feel Jean-Luc�s despair, his guilt at having escaped instead of her. It was the last thing she wanted for him to feel. Summoning all the courage she could muster, she replied to him silently, �It�s okay, Jean-Luc. I�m going to be alright.� �I�m not leaving without you.� �There�s nothing you can do for me right now. Save yourself. We�ll figure it out later.� With what could only be described as a broken spirit, the captain looked at the doctor and sent her one powerful, sorrowful thought, �I�m sorry�� Before Beverly could respond in any way, the Prytt officers tightly grabbed hold of her arms and started to haul her away. The side effect was both immediate and overwhelming. As the distance severed their connection, a severe wave of nausea grabbed hold of both Picard and Crusher. While the doctor simply slumped forward from the debilitating symptom and was therefore easily carried off, the captain fell forward and hit the ground harshly. The nausea caused by the broken connection was unlike any nausea he�d experienced in his life. It was so strong and unrelenting that it seemed to drain all the strength he had left. So for the next few minutes, the captain tried his best to regulate his breathing and take some control over himself. Then as he started to get as accustomed as he could to his condition, his thoughts once again turned to his friend. �Beverly?� He waited for her to respond, but she never did. Jean-Luc�s heart sank, �I have to find a way back to the Enterprise. It�s the only way I�ll be able to help her.� With all the strength he had left, the captain struggled to get up and finally managed to do it. With slow steady steps, he headed for what he hoped was civilization. �We�ll get you back Beverly�� * * * * Back on board the Enterprise, Commander Riker had yet to find a way to locate the two abducted officers. Since the Kes had no formal relations with the Prytt, ambassador Mauric had suggested that the best way to get them back would be to send a rescue team to the Prytt capital city. At first, Riker set aside that idea, instead searching for a more diplomatic way of handling the situation. Unfortunately, all attempts at either contacting or localizing the top authorities of the Prytt had failed. Since there were defense shields preventing them from beaming anyone in or out of the captor�s territory, the only way to get a rescue team down there would be to beam them into Kes territory. They would then have to find a way to penetrate the energy field surrounding the border to finally attempt to locate their officers and bring them home. Riker exhaled sharply as he contemplated the planet on the viewscreen. �I guess we have no choice then.� Turning to his chief of security, he continued, �Worf, assemble a security team and prepare to beam down at a moment�s notice.� �Aye, sir.� The Klingon nodded and immediately went about his task. Sensing the commander�s unease, Troi approached him. �I think we�re doing the right thing.� �I�d hoped we could have found a better solution, but we just can�t waste any more time.� Trying her best to appease his worry, the counselor added, �They�ll find them, Will.� Turning to meet Troi�s gaze, Riker gave her a grateful look. Not long after Worf had assembled his team and beamed down, the Enterprise received a message from Ambassador Mauric. Apparently, Picard had wandered into a small settlement on the outskirts of Kes territory. Once there, he had asked if there was a way he could contact his ship. The report indicated that the man seemed quite ill The proper Kes authorities had then been called and Ambassador Mauric had been informed. By momentarily lowering their defense shields, the Kes made it possible for the Enterprise to beam their captain directly to sickbay. With hurried steps, Riker made his way to see his captain. Upon arriving in sickbay, he saw that a full medical team was assessing him. Dr. Selar soon administered an anti-nausea treatment to her patient. Although somewhat effective, Picard still had a lingering trace of nausea. But at least now, it was bearable. �Now let�s see about removing the implant from your cerebral cortex,� said the doctor as she turned toward the biobed�s monitors. �No, don�t,� Picard hastily replied. �Why not?� asked Selar in her usual Vulcan tone. �It�s a psi-wave device. With it, the Prytt can read our thoughts.� �Why would you want the Prytt to read your thoughts?� interjected Riker as he stepped closer to the captain�s bedside. �Number One,� said Picard, sounding relieved to see his first officer. Without missing a beat, however, he continued, �When we were down there, this device allowed me to have a telepathic link with Beverly. If we could find a way to re-establish that link, maybe Beverly would be able to tell us where she is. If Commander LaForge could have a good look at it, maybe he could find a way to prevent the Prytt from listening in.� Looking up at Dr. Selar, Riker asked, �What do you think, Doctor?� �I would have to first establish that there wouldn�t be any danger to the captain.� Riker looked at Picard. �Sounds reasonable. In the meantime, I�ll have LaForge come up to take a look at it.� �Thank you, Number One.� It was only at that moment that Picard was able to relax a bit. Hang on Beverly� * * * * Beverly started to awaken in the same manner she had after she�d first been abducted. I was drugged again� She was disoriented and had a headache. But something was different this time around. As soon as she tried to open her eyes, she noticed the nausea was still there. Dammit� Furthermore, she couldn�t move freely. She was lying on a table with restraints on her wrists and ankles. Looking around, she surmised she was in some sort of lab. Suddenly, she heard a faint hiss as the doors to her left opened. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw who she assumed was a Prytt lab worker. The man came over to check the readouts that were displayed beside her. He then went over to a cabinet and took out an unfamiliar device. As he came back and started entering commands on the console below the display screen, he spoke, �I assume you�re feeling nauseous?� Trying to hide her discomfort as best she could, Beverly replied in anger, �What are you doing to me? Let me go!� �I�m sorry I can�t do that right now. But what I can do is make you more comfortable.� He continued working with the console. �That nausea is a simple way to keep a group of prisoners from splitting up. It makes it easier to catch them if they somehow manage to escape.� �Well that�s convenient,� the doctor spat back. �This shouldn�t take long. Hold on.� Then, all of the sudden, the nausea completely went away. It took a few seconds for her to take her breath and settle as comfortably as she could. �Like I told your officials before, there is no point in keeping me here. The Kes wanting to join the federation is of no threat to you.� The man leaned in closer and gave her a sympathetic look. �If it were up to me I�d free you, but it�s not. And considering what happened to the officer who helped you escape, it would be a suicide mission for me to try to help you. I�m sorry.� * * * * Back in sickbay, the captain�s lingering nausea inexplicably disappeared. At first, he was simply puzzled. But as he started analyzing it further, his worry started to intensify. Either Beverly�s implant had been removed or something bad had happened to her. Geordie LaForge noticed the peculiar look in the captain�s eyes. �Is everything alright captain?� �I�m not sure, Commander. Something in the connection just changed.� LaForge immediately stopped his analysis of the device, a look of concern plastered across his face. �Can you sense her again?� Picard shook his head. �No, I can�t. The nausea caused by our separation is gone.� He paused, not sure how to explain it. �I don�t know what to make of it.� Pointing back to the diagnostic unit linked to the captain�s psi-wave device, LaForge said, �Well, the good news is I�ve isolated the area of the implant that controls its output. I�ve initiated a program that could ultimately reconnect you to Doctor Crusher, while at the same time blocking your thoughts from the Prytt. All we can do now is to wait until it�s fully established. Hopefully, we�ll get the results we�re looking for.� �I hope so, Commander.� * * * * Beverly had been left alone and strapped to that table for what seemed like an eternity. In her case, however, that eternity had probably been just about an hour or so. During that whole time, she�d thought of Jean-Luc. If only she could hear his thoughts once more. For the brief time they had been connected, she had grown so accustomed to it, that now that it was gone, she felt like there was a huge void within her. It was the loneliest feeling. She�d tried repeatedly to call out to him within her own mind, but each time there had been no reply but silence. Dear god, I hope he�s made it back safely. Suddenly, she was pulled from her thoughts when two people entered the small lab. She didn�t recognize either of them. One immediately walked over to the display screen, while the other went about installing some sort of device at the foot of the table where Beverly lay. The man at the display screen shook his head and addressed the other, �I don�t understand why the link isn�t working. We should be able to hear her thoughts by now.� The other man finished installing what looked like an odd box of some sort. It was black with shimmering red areas on its polished surface. �Hopefully this will fix the problem. We�ll just have to wait a bit.� As the doctor listened to their every word, her temper started to flare once more. �I want to see whoever�s in charge here. You have no right keeping me here. I�ve done nothing wrong.� �Oh, don�t worry, you�ll see Minister Lorin soon enough,� said one of the men with evil humor in his voice. �Maybe then, you�ll wish you never saw her at all.� �Damn you,� spat Beverly defiantly. The men then simply walked out, leaving the doctor to ponder her situation. She knew she had to get out of there, but didn�t know how to go about it. First, there were those damned restraints. Beverly started to fight against them. After a while, her ankles and especially her wrists began to hurt. Stopping momentarily for a break, the doctor closed her eyes. All of a sudden, a brief sensation invaded her mind. Opening her eyes, she scanned her surroundings to make sure she was in fact still alone, which she was. Frowning slightly, she listened. There was nothing. Just when she was dismissing it as a simple side-effect from everything she�d been through the past two days, the feeling came back. This time, it stayed longer and she could actually start to identify it. Guilt� Then tremendous worry and sadness� And it was gone again. Certain she wasn�t imagining things, she started to listen more closely to the inner sanctum of her mind. �I can�t believe I� so stupi�� The words, not hers, were broken, interrupted. Instinctively, she knew. With all the concentration she could muster, she tried to send a thought forward, �Jean-Luc?� It was gone again. �Dammit,� she muttered out loud. A few seconds later, it returned. �Why didn�t I pay more attention?� This time, she could make out his voice clearly. It really was Jean-Luc. With relief washing over her, she managed an almost inaudible laugh. �Jean-Luc? It�s Beverly.� She waited a bit, but there was no answer. she tried again, �Can you hear me?� �If only I hadn�t been looking up. She might have made it through� If anything should happen to her� Dammit it�s all my fault�� Beverly frowned again and shook her head ever so slightly. �No� it�s not your fault, Jean-Luc. Don�t blame yourself.� From the emotions coming through the connection, Beverly could tell that he wasn�t aware of her in his mind. �She should have been the one to make it back� not me�� It pained her deeply to hear him saying those things, but at least she knew that he was safe. Probably even back on board the Enterprise. �I can�t lose her� Stop thinking like that, Jean-Luc! Beverly can take care of herself. She�s a strong woman...� Beverly fought to keep the sting of tears from her eyes. �Jean-Luc� I�m okay�� * * * * Picard sat on the edge of the biobed, trying as best he could to keep his captainly demeanor. On the inside however, he was crumbling. His moment of inattention had cost her her freedom and he didn�t know how he could live with himself if anything happened to her. He didn�t want to think about what kind of reprisal she might receive from their attempted escape. He tried to shake the mental picture that particular train of thought produced. The captain sat straight up. He�d felt something invade his mind. At first it was intermittent, and then it became more and more constant. He tried to analyze it, and finally identified the feeling as a sadness laced with compassion. It felt foreign to him in the sense that these emotions weren�t from his own mind. Then, he heard the words that he�d hoped to hear since he�d last seen Beverly Crusher. �Jean-Luc�� her voice felt soft and tender in his mind. �Beverly?� �Yes, it�s me.� �Thank god you�re alright.� The relief in his thoughts was just as soon replaced by worry. �How have they been treating you?� �Don�t worry about me. I�m okay� So you�ve made it back to the Enterprise alright?� �I made it back, yes�� �Stop it�� �Stop what?� �Feeling guilty� I can sense you, remember?� Just then, Commander LaForge and Dr. Selar entered the captain�s private treatment room. �Commander, Doctor.� A small smile etched itself as Picard went on, �I can hear her.� Dr. Selar immediately went over the readouts on the side of the biobed. �So far there seems to be no ill effects from the link.� �From what�s displayed here, the program seems to be fully established,� LaForge said as he checked the diagnostic unit attached to the implant. �Will it keep the Prytt from hearing us?� asked Picard. �Hopefully it will, but we�ll have to wait and see.� Tapping his commbadge, the captain stated, �Picard to Riker.� �Riker here.� �Number One, we�ve been able to re-establish the link between Doctor Crusher and me. Has Mister Worf contacted you with any news?� �Not yet, Sir, but it shouldn�t be too long now.� �Contact me as soon as you hear anything.� �I will, Sir.� �Picard out.� Turning toward Selar, the captain raised his eyebrows. �Now, when can I get out of here?� �Well, you should remain under observation for the night.� �But you said yourself that there seems to be no ill effects from the link.� Getting up from the biobed, he tugged at the base of his dusty tunic. �I can contact you immediately if any unusual symptom should arise. But what good am I sitting around here waiting? With this link between Beverly and I now established, we stand a better chance of getting her back. But not if I�m sitting around here doing nothing.� With her ever-impassive expression, the Vulcan physician contemplated his request. �I�ll allow it. But only if you promise to return to sickbay at the first sign of any problem.� The captain nodded. �I will, don�t worry.� Then turning toward LaForge, Picard gestured toward the device linked to his implant. �So do I have to walk around dragging this thing behind me?� LaForge smiled and shook his head. �No, Sir. Just give me a minute and you�ll be free to go.� �Thank you, Commander,� the captain said. �So you�ve negotiated your way out of a stay in sickbay, I see.� Her voice comforted him beyond belief. �I�m going to get you out of there, Beverly.� �I know you will.� �There you go, Captain. You�re a free man,� LaForge said, unknowingly interrupting the captain�s private conversation with Beverly. Upon leaving sickbay, the captain opted to stop briefly in his quarters to shower and change. The whole time, however, he remained focused on getting Beverly home. He asked her if she�d seen where they had taken her, or noticed anything that might shed some light on her location. Unfortunately, her captors had wasted no time in sedating her after they�d hauled her away from the captain. Even as the hot water hit his face for the first time, his focus never relented. �Do you see anything that might help you escape?� �I�m strapped to a table, Jean-Luc. Unless the Prytt have a change of plans, I�m not going anywhere anytime soon� Damn, these bindings hurt�� Sensing his distress, Beverly said gently, �Jean-Luc� don�t�� �I�m sorry, I can�t help it� The thought of you being strapped down to a table is driving me crazy. If I could trade places with you, I�d do it in an instant.� Her voice, low and filled with emotion echoed almost immediately, �I know you would.� In less than ten minutes he was on his way to the bridge, his steps filled with purpose. As the doors hissed open to reveal the large and airy command center of the Enterprise, he said in a voice full of authority, �Status report, Number One.� �Sir, Lieutenant Worf just reported that he and his team have successfully infiltrated the Prytt border. They�re on their way to the capital city and should be there by nightfall.� Nodding satisfactorily, he adjusted his tunic and sat down in the command chair. �Any luck in trying to contact the Prytt authorities?� �We�ve managed to contact someone in the lower levels of government. Needless to say, the attempt didn�t prove to be too fruitful. We�re hoping that Minister Lorin will get word of this and decide to contact us on her own.� �Very well, Number One.� Sitting on the chair next to the captain�s, Riker leaned in and asked in a discreet voice, �How is she?� �So far, they haven�t mistreated her,� said Picard without tearing his eyes off the viewscreen showing the planet. Riker could tell by the look on the captain�s face that he was worried that the situation would change. The commander hoped they wouldn�t go that far. �Someone�s coming,� Beverly said suddenly. �Beverly, whatever you do, don�t let them know we can hear each other�s thoughts.� �I won�t.� Beverly eyed the people that were just now coming in carefully. Finally, she saw her, �Minister Lorin...� �So there�s the troublesome human conspirator who attempted to evade us,� Minister Lorin said with evident animosity in her voice. �It�s a good thing your friend got away� good for him, but not for you, unfortunately.� Beverly gave the minister a look of pure defiance. She wasn�t going to be intimidated by the likes of her. Turning to one of her aids, Lorin gestured toward the strange device at the foot of the table. �Have we established a connection yet?� Looking over the information that presented itself before him, the aid shook his head. �No, Ma�am.� �They can�t hear me, Jean-Luc, and they haven�t figured out we can hear each other.� �Good.� �Why isn�t it working?� asked Lorin, impatient. �From what we can tell, the device isn�t damaged. Perhaps it�s simply not compatible with human physiology.� �Find a solution and fast.� Back toward Beverly, Lorin continued, �As for you, we can�t waste any more time.� Turning abruptly toward the door, the minister added, �Guards, bring her to the interrogation room immediately.� From the bridge of the Enterprise, Jean-Luc knew immediately that things were starting to go downhill for the doctor. �They�re taking me to the interrogation room.� �I know� it�ll be alright. Be strong.� Turning abruptly toward Riker, Picard asked in no uncertain terms, �I need to know what�s going with our security team, immediately. They�re bringing her to be interrogated.� He got up from his chair and started pacing back and forth. �Beverly.� �Yes?� �Look around. There might be clues as to your location.� Picard waited anxiously for a few moments. �Nothing yet, Jean-Luc. I�m sorry.� �Don�t worry about it. We�ll find you no matter what.� When the doors to the dark interrogation chamber opened, the two guards that were holding her by the arms flung her forward with such force that Beverly landed on her knees. Feeling Jean-Luc�s anxiety at her predicament, she made it a point to reassure him, �I�m okay, Jean-Luc.� Getting up, she straightened and prepared herself to challenge whatever would come her way. �Sit down!� barked one of the guards. Forcefully, he pushed her down on a small chair. Before she knew it, a bright light shone directly in her face, causing her to squint in discomfort. Feeling the guards settle in attention poses on each side of her, the doctor braced herself for what was next. Over a loud speaker, Minister Lorin�s voice suddenly resounded, �Alright, we�re going to do this the old fashioned way. Tell us again, what are your military intentions with the Kes?� �We are not establishing a military alliance with the Kes. They simply want to join the Federation. Starfleet would not participate in, nor would it sanction, any military action toward your people.� �That�s not good enough. From the top. What are your goals in establishing a military alliance with the Kes?� �I just told you, we�re not planning a military alliance with the Kes! God, how many times do I have to tell you?� �As many times as it takes.� The next two hours were unbearable for the captain. He was left in such an uncomfortable state of mind that he�d opted to retreat into his ready room until any further development in the search for his chief medical officer surfaced. In his solitude, he witnessed the endless questioning Beverly endured. She would tell the Prytt the same thing over and over again, never wavering. All Jean-Luc could do was send her encouragement, tell her to hang in there. He could feel her strength, her resolve. It left him no doubt as to why he�d always admired her. She was his rock, his best friend. The previous night had been full of revelations as he sat by the small fire they�d built. Due to their telepathic connection, he had inadvertently revealed the secret that he had fallen in love with her when they�d first met twenty years prior. He hadn�t been prepared for that revelation. So much so that he had even told her that he didn�t have those feelings for her anymore. Of course, it was a lie, a feeble attempt at convincing himself that he was over the love that had cause him more than his fair share of guilt over the years. At the time, he wasn�t sure if she�d bought it or not. To his relief, she hadn�t pressed the matter further. �You might soon regret your decision not to cooperate with us, Doctor,� Lorin�s voice boomed over the speakers. �I have cooperated,� Beverly angrily replied. �I�ve told nothing but the truth.� �We�ll see if you change your mind in the next few minutes. Guards, please secure our detainee and exit the interrogation chamber.� The two guards swiftly took hold of Beverly�s arms and secured them to her chair. Their task complete, they exited without looking back. Although trying desperately to keep her emotions under control, fear slowly started to creep in as she waited for what the Prytt had in store for her. �Beverly, what�s going on?� �I don�t know yet.� Suddenly, Beverly heard a faint hissing sound and soon understood what it was. The small room was being filled with a gas of some sort. Immediately, she started coughing. As the seconds went by, it was getting more and more difficult for her to breathe. �Beverly! Are you alright?� Jean-Luc said, sounding more alarmed than she�d ever heard him. ��I can�t breathe�� �Alright, just hang in there. Remember, they need you. They won�t let you suffocate.� ��Oh my god�� Despite his brave front, Beverly could feel the captain�s horror at what was happening. Not only was the gas preventing her ability to breathe, it was also irritating her mouth, nose, and eyes. She wasn�t sure exactly how long it took before breathable air started to fill the room again, but it had seemed like an eternity to her. As she tried to stop her coughing in order to get some oxygen back into her system, she could hear Jean-Luc�s voice willing her to fight, �Breathe Beverly, breathe. You�re going to be alright.� All the while on the Enterprise, the captain tapped his commbadge and urgently asked, �Picard to Riker. Please report to my ready room immediately.� �Aye, Sir,� came the prompt reply. The doors opened almost instantly and Riker strode in quickly with a look of concern on his face. �They�re torturing her, Will. Now where the hell is Mister Worf�s team?� �We just got word a few moments ago. They�ve arrived in the capital city and are using a map obtained from Kes intelligence indicating several buildings where Doctor Crusher might be being held.� �I want her found.� Taking a second to calm down a bit, the captain continued, �I�m sorry if I�m a bit edgy . Sensing what she�s going through down there isn�t easy.� Riker had seldom seen his captain as distraught as he was now. �I�m sure it�s not, Sir. Don�t worry, we�re going to get her back.� �Thank you, Number One. Dismissed.� As soon as Riker left the ready room, the captain turned his attention back to Beverly. �Are you okay?� ��Yes�� Picard closed his eyes and, with his elbows on the desk-top, put his head in his hands. For the next few hours, he felt nothing but helplessness as the process of interrogation and torture repeated over and over again. A part of him was afraid he�d go mad. At first, they simply subjected her to the noxious gas, but after a while they grew tired of her unwavering answers. At that point they changed their tactics. Now, when they felt like torturing her, they would use an electrical current designed specifically to cause a substantial amount of pain to their detainee. Each time the electricity jolted her already exhausted body, the captain would hear the unbearable cries of her tortured soul. At one point, after a pretty lengthy infliction of pain upon her, he heard something he never thought he�d hear Beverly say, �Stop! Please stop� God help me please!� The voice in his mind was not the soft and controlled voice he�d always associated with his chief medical officer. Instead, it was pure agonizing screams of desperation. She was sobbing relentlessly now. �� I can�t take much more of this�� Jean-Luc shook his head with his eyes closed and sobbed softly. Not only could he hear all her thoughts, but he could also feel the emotional damage they were inflicting on her. �Beverly�� ��What if I lied to them, Jean-Luc� what if I told them what they wanted to hear�� �I know that the temptation to give in is strong� but please� try to fight it. If they�re satisfied you�ve given them what they want, they could very likely decide to kill you�� �� This is so difficult �� �I know it is. Let�s just focus on something else, alright? Think about Wesley.� ��Wesley�� He could feel her emotions improve slightly as she thought about her only son. Not being able to stay at his desk anymore, Jean-Luc got up and looked out the viewport. Beverly was completely exhausted. They�d tested her threshold for pain to its maximum. Slumped in her chair, she barely noticed the guards entering the darkened room. When they untied her and hauled her out of the chair, she heard Jean-Luc�s frantic voice, �What�s going on? Beverly, answer me.� ��They�re taking me somewhere�� she answered back. Somewhat disoriented by her ordeal, Beverly couldn�t even tell in which direction they were taking her. Then, as abruptly as they�d removed her from the interrogation room, they threw her into a small cell. She slumped to the ground, exhausted, but grateful that she would in all likelihood be left alone for the time being. �I think they�re going to leave me alone for a while� Tired� I�m so tired�� Picard could sense her succumbing to her fatigue. �Try to get some sleep.� ��Say you�ll stay with me...� With a sad smile pulling at the corners of his mouth, he reassured her, �Don�t worry, I�m not going anywhere. We�re linked together, remember?� ��Right�� For the next few minutes, Beverly was silent. Satisfied she�d drifted off to sleep, Picard walked over to the sofa and sat down. Finally, he decided to lie down also. This had been trying for him too and he felt emotionally drained. �You�re lying down too aren�t you?� Beverly asked. �I thought you were asleep.� �I�m trying to, it�s just that� I�m scared, Jean-Luc.� �Don�t be scared. Just close your eyes and imagine me next to you.� Jean-Luc quickly felt a sense of comfort from his friend. �You know, it�s weird. With this connection between us, it�s as if you�re really here with me.� �Well then just try to forget your surroundings and imagine that you�re up here with me. Safely back on board the Enterprise.� �I�ll try� Can you just talk to me for a little bit? Hearing your voice is� really reassuring�� �Alright, but try to sleep. You�re exhausted�� Then Picard simply started talking to her about random things. Things that usually made her smile, like her plays, her dancing. The more he talked, the more he felt her relax until finally she surrendered to slumber. Then little by little, he too started to succumb to sleep. With her presence in his mind, it wasn�t long until he started dreaming of her. Despite the horror he�d just witnessed, his mind decided to take him to a much better place. Perhaps a part of the mind�s mysterious ability to protect itself from a traumatic event. In his dreams, she was safe� by his side, smiling sweetly at him amidst the most beautiful of meadows. Her hair, which flowed in the wind, tickled the side of her face. Picking up a flower, she looked at it closely. It was in the last stage of its life cycle. Each petal had turned into white downy fibers which held a single seed at the end. Bringing the flower closer to her lips, she gently blew on it. The downy fibers simply detached themselves and were swiftly carried away by the wind. Watching the seeds distance themselves from her, the beautiful redhead smiled to herself and then turned to meet his gaze. Her eyes, so blue, so full of life were filled with the most unbelievable warmth� And just like that, the two friends found an oasis of relative peace amidst the difficult time they were going through. If only for a little while� Jean-Luc wasn�t sure for how long he�d dozed off. The only thing he knew was that when he awoke, he became aware that she was sobbing. �Beverly?� he asked tentatively. For a brief moment, he felt her tense inwardly, �Jean-Luc, I thought you were sleeping.� A tinge of embarrassment accompanied her sentence. She hadn�t meant to let him hear her cry. �I just woke up.� Pausing briefly, he asked, �Are you alright?� �Yes, I�m sorry. I didn�t mean to break down like that.� She sounded a lot stronger than when she�d first been thrown in her cell. �You have nothing to be sorry for. I�ve been through the same thing before, remember.� �On Celtris III� Our roles were reversed then. I guess thinking about it now I can understand how you feel�� �In a way, it�s a kind of survivor�s guilt. It�s not really justified, but at the same time, it can�t be helped either.� �Exactly,� replied Beverly sadly. Then, �Jean-Luc?� �Yes, what is it?� �How did you do it, I mean, how did you manage to endure all that time under Gul Madred�s control? I�ve just been here a day and already I feel as if I�m losing myself.� �Suffering doesn�t know the difference between one day and several days. The truth of the matter is that any amount of time spent intentionally inflicted suffering upon another is in itself already far too long.� �It makes me angry because I should be stronger than this. Every second that goes by, I feel like a failure because it�s breaking me�� Jean-Luc could feel her despair and it broke his heart. �You�re not a failure. In fact, there is no one I admire more than you. Since the first day we met, I knew that there was something about you that would always make you stand out in a crowd. You�re a remarkable woman, a woman whose heart is filled with strength of character and integrity. If anyone can make it through this, it�s you.� Seeing she wasn�t saying anything, he continued, �My mind is literally an open book right now, you would know if I were lying. I meant every word I just said. You need to believe that.� �You�ve always had a way of picking me up when I�m down� Thank you.� �I�ll always be here for you, Beverly� always.� �I know you will.� Along with those words came an emotion so strong, it was almost overwhelming. Fighting back tears, Jean-Luc fully opened his mind to what she was projecting. It was an affection so profound, so deep, it mirrored what he�d always felt toward her. At that particular moment, all he wanted to do was hold her in his arms to comfort her. With a concentration so intense, he tried to recall her features, her eyes, her lips, the fiery color of her hair. Then he vividly imagined himself wrapping his arms around her� What could only be described as a subconscious gasp immediately followed, �I� I can feel you Jean-Luc.� A hint of wonder filled her voice, �Please� don�t let go.� �I won�t.� It was absolutely incredible. Their connection, however strong it had been before, felt even stronger now. Closing their eyes, each could practically see the other in their mind�s eye. From the moment they�d discovered their connection, the captain had intentionally put up a barrier between them. Of course, it was hardly effective, but it still managed to hide some of the feelings he harbored for her, feelings that left him vulnerable. But as he held her in his mind, his ability to block the most inner secrets of his heart faded. Lying on the floor of her cell, Beverly suddenly felt a flood of emotions from her friend. They were very intense and in a way felt like a warm blanket. It was so clear� a love so deep it was almost agonizing. As she took in the emotions that flowed gently toward her, a recent memory started to surface in her mind. � �Why didn�t you ever tell me you were in love with me?� �You were married to my best friend� At first at thought that it was harmless infatuation, something hormonal rather than emotional. But after a while I realized that it was something else and it wasn�t right.� �And when Jack died you felt guilty�� �I felt guilty before he died. Having feelings like that for my best friend�s wife.� �That�s why you didn�t want me on the Enterprise seven years ago.� �I didn�t know how I would react. But then, little by little, I realized that I� I didn�t have those feelings anymore�� � �Why did you lie to me, Jean-Luc?� Beverly�s question held no animosity whatsoever. Instead, she�d stated it simply, softly. She just needed to understand. Instead of answering with words, Jean-Luc simply projected a strong feeling of shame. He hadn�t wanted to deceive her. He�d simply been caught off guard and hadn�t had time to figure out what he should say. �You said you didn�t have those feelings anymore� Right now, it�s as clear as day to me that that�s simply not true. I can feel everything you feel, Jean-Luc�� �Beverly� I�� Determined to fully explain himself, Jean-Luc searched deep within himself for the truth, a truth that she deserved. Unfortunately, before he could really say anything, he felt something was wrong. �They�re back.� Fear invaded her once again. �It�ll be fine, Beverly. Be strong.� �I�ll try.� As the captain got up from the sofa, his communicator sounded, �Captain Picard to the bridge.� Tapping it, he answered, �Be right out.� With hurried steps, the captain emerged from his ready room. �Status report, Number One.� �Sir, Lieutenant Worf has just informed us that they�ve infiltrated what they think is the building where Dr. Crusher is being held.� With his captain�s mask firmly in place, Picard sat down in his command chair. �Thank you, Commander.� Focusing once again on Beverly, he silently gave her the encouraging news. �Something�s happening over here, Jean-Luc. The guards seem nervous. They�re escorting me somewhere.� Not knowing exactly what was going on down on the planet was agonizing for Picard. �Captain,� Riker suddenly said, �we have Worf on audio.� �Patch him through,� Picard replied. �Captain, we have localized the controls for this vicinity�s defense systems. As soon as we find Dr. Crusher, we will initiate a remote deactivation of the defense shield covering this area. You will then only have about ten seconds to beam us up.� �Understood,� the captain said. �Picard to transporter room two. Please standby for emergency beam-out of the away team as well as Dr. Crusher.� �Aye, Sir.� With hope filling his entire being, Picard redirected his thoughts toward Crusher. �Are you getting any of this, Beverly?� �Yes.� She, too, was starting to feel hopeful. Then suddenly, something seemed to catch her attention. �What�s that? Worf� Worf�s here! They�re firing phasers�� The away team�s audio link activated once more, the chief of security�s voice was heard on the bridge�s loudspeaker, �Worf to Enterprise. We have found Dr. Crusher and have successfully incapacitated the guards� Deactivating defense shield now. " �Picard to transporter room two� Now!� The seconds that followed seemed to trickle by at an interminably slow pace. �Transporter room, report!� �The beam-up was successful captain. Dr. Crusher and all the members of the away team are back on board.� �You have the bridge, Number One.� Without missing a beat, the captain hurried as fast as he could to the transporter room. He�d made his way there so quickly that by the time the doors hissed open, Worf was only just then helping Dr. Crusher down the transporter pad. When their eyes met, it was as if the weight of the entire ordeal lifted. Although looking very much like someone who�d been through hell, Beverly�s beauty still shone brightly as she smiled tiredly at him. With rapid steps, Picard made his way up to her and helped Worf support her. �You need to get to sickbay. I�ll call for a medical team to come and get you.� �That�s quite alright, Jean-Luc. I think I can make it there on my own.� �Okay� but only if you let me help you. No ifs, ands or buts about it,� replied Picard with a small smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. �You�ve got a deal.� Looking at his security chief, the captain said, �Thank you, Mister Worf, I�ll take it from here.� Nodding, the Klingon retreated. Before leaving the transporter room, he turned toward Beverly. �It�s good to have you back, Doctor.� �Thank you for everything you did, Worf,� Beverly said warmly. Smiling slightly, the Klingon nodded and left. Before getting under way, the captain tapped his communicator. �Picard to Dr. Selar.� �Dr. Selar here.� �I�m bringing a patient over to you, Doctor, and I think you�ll be very pleased once you see who it is.� �It is logical to conclude that Dr. Crusher has returned, then?� �Your conclusion is correct. We�ll be there shortly. Picard out.� With Beverly�s arm over his shoulder for support, Picard looked at her and asked, �Ready to go?� �More than ready.� She smiled. Steadily but slowly, the pair started to make their way toward sickbay. �Thank you, Jean-Luc.� �What for?� �Thank you for being there for me� If it hadn�t been for you, I might have given in to them. Then who knows what they would have done to me.� Picard shook his head. �You give me too much credit. You were a lot stronger than you think.� Looking at one another, they both smiled softly. And as they got closer to the doors that led to sickbay, Beverly�s thoughts once again resounded in the captain�s mind, �Our link will be severed soon�� Despite having been really awkward in the beginning, the telepathic connection bestowed upon them had become surprisingly comforting. They�d grown accustomed to sharing their personal thoughts with one another and the prospect of losing that bond forever was something they weren�t entirely looking forward too. �You know,� responded the captain, �I think I�m going to miss this.� �Yeah, so will I.� Upon entering sickbay, Beverly was immediately taken to a biobed to be examined. Giving her an encouraging look as she lay down, Jean-Luc silently said, �I�ll be right over there if you need me.� �Okay.� Although he went to sit in a small waiting area just out of view of the main treatment area, Captain Picard never really left her side. A few minutes later, Dr. Selar approached him and said, �You may go see her now.� �Thank you.� As he walked to her bedside, Beverly turned her face toward him and smiled. �Aside from dehydration, exhaustion, and a few superficial burns from the electric shocks, I guess I�m in rather good shape.� �That�s good to hear,� he replied as he leaned over her a bit. �I�ll have to stay here for another day at least, though.� �Somehow, I don�t think it�s a bad idea.� �I know.� Cringing inside, she continued, �it�s just that I�m usually the one telling patients they have to stay overnight. But you know what they say, doctors make the worst patients.� Oblivious to the medical personnel around them, the two shared a laugh. �You do realize that we�re having a silent conversation,� Jean-Luc said humorously, �and that might seem kind of strange to the people around us.� �It�s no stranger than having two Betazoids in one room.� �True.� Jean-Luc couldn�t help but breathe out in relief as he gazed in her eyes. For a while, a part of him feared he�d never see her again. Taking in every detail in her features, he was quite amazed at how accurate his recollection had been when they were separated. He�d so often admired her soft features that he was as familiar with her face as an artist was familiar with a masterpiece. �So beautiful�� Picard then felt somewhat embarrassed for he hadn�t meant to be caught flat-out admiring her. Amused, Beverly laughed inwardly and said, �That�s okay, Jean-Luc� A girl always likes her compliments.� Blushing, he looked down, not quite able to meet her gaze. Feeling his discomfort, the redhead discreetly took his hand in hers and squeezed it momentarily before letting go again. �I mean it.� Her tone was softer now, her features more serious. Jean-Luc truly appreciated her attempt at reassuring him. Pausing, he carefully pondered his next words. �I guess we have a lot to talk about now, don�t we?� �Yes, we do.� That moment hung heavily between them and the melee of emotions churned back and forth became a blur. There were just too many at the same time, uncertainty, love, fear, relief� But before any of those could be sorted out so that they could become at least identifiable, Picard and Crusher were interrupted. �Captain, Doctor,� Dr. Selar said as she walked toward them, �now would probably be a good time to start disconnecting you two. We don�t know how safe these implants can be if they�re left there for too long. We should therefore start the process of severing your telepathic link immediately.� As the reality of their impending disconnection hit them, both Picard and Crusher started to feel a sense of anxiety. While the captain was being motioned toward the biobed right next to Beverly�s, her voice echoed in his mind, �So I guess this is it.� �I guess it is.� �This shouldn�t take too long,� assured Dr. Selar. Nodding, Picard lay down and looked straight up at the ceiling. �Are you ready for this?� Beverly hesitated. �Yeah, I think I am.� The truth of the matter was a part of her dreaded this. And as the seconds went by, she could tell that he felt the same way. �It�s going to be alright.� Once again, his words sought to reassure her, perhaps even reassure himself. �I know,� she answered in the most convincing way she could. During the last few seconds of their telepathic connection both sought out the other, wanting to cement the sensation of sharing their thoughts to memory. When the implant finally ceased to function, it felt as if they�d been torn away from one another in a manner that was simply too abrupt. The following moments felt like the loneliest they�d ever experienced. There was no more sharing of thoughts, no more sharing of emotions. Their minds were isolated from one another in a way that should have felt totally normal, but instead ended up feeling rather foreign. Once the procedure was complete and Dr. Selar walked away, they sat there facing each other for what seemed like an eternity� * * * * Beverly had indeed spent the night in sickbay, but since all her tests came back normal, she received her discharge at around noon-time. Alone in her quarters, it didn�t take long before she started to feel overwhelmed by everything that had happened to her. The damage they�d inflicted on her would take a very long time to heal, she knew that. Sitting at the table, she pondered the stars outside. So what�s next? Instinctively, a part of her expected Jean-Luc�s voice to once again echo through her mind and provide her with an answer. But of course, it didn�t. When the chime sounded, the doctor�s first thoughts were that it was Jean-Luc. But in the end, it hadn�t been. Sensing her friend�s troubled soul, Deanna Troi had dropped by to see how she could help. At first, Beverly was a bit resistant toward Troi�s counseling, but in the end gave in. The two of them sat at the table for at least two hours, during which Beverly poured her heart out in an attempt to understand what effect her ordeal was having on her. In the end, it had turned out to be true blessing. Deanna had given her some of the tools she needed to really start healing. When the counselor finally left her quarters, Beverly felt like an immense weight had been lifted. Of course, she still had a lot of counseling left to go through, but at least it was a start. Retreating to her bedroom, Beverly fell back on the bed and looked out the viewport on the angled wall above her bed. Oh, Jean-Luc� Despite having seen him briefly that very morning, she missed him terribly. This newfound solitude wasn�t something she really felt comfortable with yet. But aside from the loneliness, the sheer uncertainty of how things would ultimately play out between them was gnawing away at her. She�d felt the strength of his love for her, but he�d fought so fiercely to conceal it from her that she wasn�t sure what to think of it. Turning on her stomach, Beverly buried her face in her pillow and yelled out in frustration. Why does everything have to be so complicated? There was only one thing she could think of doing that might help to appease the turmoil inside her. It wouldn�t be easy, but she knew it had to be done. Lifting her face out of her pillow, she blew a strand of hair out of her eye and exhaled. I have to go see him. Getting up, Beverly adjusted her grey sweater and headed toward the doors that led to the corridor beyond. When they hissed open, a startled Jean-Luc stood on the other side. Just as equally as surprised to see him standing there, Beverly said, �Jean-Luc, I was just about to go see you.� With a small smile, he responded, �I guess we both had the same idea at the same time.� Stepping aside, she said, �Please, come in.� �Thank you.� Seeming a bit shy for some reason, the captain stood there and waited for her to invite him to sit down. Taking her place in the chair opposite him, Beverly eyed him carefully. It was rather strange. Neither of them was speaking. Instead, it was as if they were both trying to figure out what the other was thinking. Needless to say, their attempt didn�t succeed. It seemed they had more questions than answers and they would have to address them verbally. �So?� said the captain. �So?� echoed the doctor. �How are you feeling?� he asked, obviously trying to tread in safe territory for the time being. �I�m okay. I mean, I still have a long way to go until I can put what happened in that interrogation room behind me, but I think I�m on the right track.� �Give it time, it�ll get better. I promise.� �Deanna�s helping me a lot.� �I�m sure she is. After I got back from Celtris III, she helped me sort through a lot of things. But you know what else helped me?� Beverly waited to see what he would say. �Having you to talk to,� he said meaningfully. Fighting back tears, Beverly smiled. �I just want you to know that I�m going to be there for you, Beverly.� �I know you will and that really means a lot.� Her voice was but a mere whisper. With his gaze firmly locked on hers, Jean-Luc exhaled. He was about to say something, but at the last second held back. It had been fairly obvious to Beverly too, so she shook her head slightly. �I can�t read you, Jean-Luc.� �I know� it�s just�� Summoning every last bit of courage he had, he continued, �What we shared began to unravel so many things that have been locked away for the longest time. And I�m finding it difficult to figure them all out.� Getting up and walking around the coffee table, Beverly knelt down in front of him. �Well that�s something that we�re going to have to do together.� Knowing that the only way to meet her halfway would be to discuss it openly, Jean-Luc took her hands in his and contemplated his next words, �Over the years, I�ve fought so hard to overcome the guilt I felt in response to my feelings for you. And until the other night, by that fire, I thought that they would forever remain hidden. I wasn�t prepared for that and that�s why I lied.� Beverly looked straight into his eyes, �You knew Jack just as well as I did. Do you honestly think he would think any less of you if he knew what you were hiding all those years? You never acted on your feelings for me and remained true to your friendship with him, right through to the end. But Jean-Luc�� Edging closer to him, she looked at him with nothing but sincerity in her eyes, �Jack�s gone� he has been for many years now. And I don�t think that he would hold it against you if you finally let go of this burden you�ve been carrying and simply lived your life.� �I�ve never really thought about it that way before�� �What I felt from you � there was nothing wrong about it. Your heart was opened to me and it revealed nothing even remotely malicious. You�re a good man, Jean-Luc, and I think it�s about time you realized that.� �There�s something I haven�t told you �� �What�s that?� �I�ve always been afraid that you�d think less of me if you knew how I felt towards you when you were married to Jack.� Beverly shook her head and smiled sadly. �I would never think less of you.� �I know that now� but it only became clear afterward, when you opened your heart to me in turn.� Shaking his head, he closed his eyes and frowned. �If only words could express what I feel for you right now.� Gently caressing the side of his face, Beverly replied in a husky voice, �Why don�t you just show me?� Slowly pulling her to him, Jean-Luc kissed her forehead. Then bringing his mouth next to her ear, he slowly exhaled and whispered, �Is this really real?� �It is.� Beverly couldn�t help but tremble slightly as she took in what was finally happening between them. Gently kissing the side of her neck, he finally said it, �I love you, Beverly. I love you so much.� Although the words weren�t a revelation in themselves, they were a confirmation that he was indeed embracing the notion that they could become something more than friends without the burden of guilt. �I love you, too.� Beverly pulled back and smiled at him with tears streaming down her face. The kiss that followed was not just sweet and tender. It also cemented the fact that they would no longer hold back when it came to the love they shared. A love born out of friendship that had only intensified as the years went by. Jean-Luc and Beverly, two people who were once so alone, could now start living again. Living a life filled with joy, sorrows, and a myriad of other emotions that they would, from now on, experience together. The End BACK TO LIBRARY |