| In Loving Memory An alarming number of my peers are deceased. Some of them probably deserve Darwin awards, but sadly it seems the leading cause of death is suicide. Normally I bitterly scoff that people who attempt suicide are just going to keep trying until they succeed so why bother to try and help them. Most recently, however, a close friend of mine took his own life. I say close friend, but what I mean is that he was a very important person in my life. I'm not sure if he ever knew it. Everyone who knew him was drawn to him, he could make anyone laugh in any situation. But I guess he didn't realize how much he meant to people. It occurs to me now that I've probably made a lot of people think I really hate them. For the record though, I keep in touch with all the men I bitch about on this page and don't feel I'm on bad terms with any of them. (I'm just better off without some of them being a part of my life) But just because I don't like somebody doesn't mean I don't care about them. And if anyone in my life has any doubts about my feelings for them or even if they're having one of those days where it seems nobody cares, just please know that if I ever did care about you, I still do. Some things are unbreakable. I know I didn't cause my friend's suicide. But I wish I'd NOTICED that he was depressed and I wish I'd told him just how much of an influence he'd had on my life. And to anyone out there who ever thinks that nobody cares, you're just not thinking hard enough. (With the exception of Ben, I'm pretty sure nobody cares about you, and if you feel compelled to commit suicide, well I hope you succeed.) |
 |