February

February 1 3:00 PM
Listening to: The Church- "Starfish"
Site of the Day: TLA Video
Interesting News Story of the Day: 7 Astronauts Die As Shuttle Breaks Apart (why do shuttle problems always happen at the end of Jan/beginning of Feb?)
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Neil had mentioned a few things he would like on hand when he's here next week, and one of the things he wanted was for me to make brownies. It sounded like a good idea, so I bought a mixing bowl (and all the ingredients, of course) and am now ready to make him brownies. The brownie idea sounded like so much fun, I decided to make pot brownies today. I've never done this before, so I don't know how well they will work, but we will soon find out as I just had 2 of them. They taste kind of herby, but it's not too bad. I've never tried them before either, so I don't know how they are supposed to taste.

About the "Site of the Day": I have had trouble with finding this store. I found it a few years ago and was so excited about it but then forgot where it was exactly and didn't know the name. Then I found it again a few years ago and was excited again, but stupidly, I still didn't pay attention to the name. I thought it was on 8th St., but when I searched for video stores on 8th St., I couldn't find anything about it. And I tried searching for video stores on City Search but never found it there either. Yesterday I was looking on City Search for something else, and I found it. Now I have it bookmarked and on my website so I will not forget again. I hope to rent some movies there one day when I have the time and energy.

Today (if the brownies work), I want to watch "American Beauty" and then go through the mail and stretch while I watch GH.

I'm IM-ing Josh right now and he's complaining about housekeeping in hotels- how they always bang on your door and come in when you specifically ask to not be disturbed and tell them that you don't want housekeeping. I'm glad to know it's not just me who gets this. Do other people hate this? Why is housekeeping like this everywhere? The guest should decide when and if they want their room cleaned. If someone is staying in a hotel for a week, they shouldn't need their room cleaned every day. It especially bothers me when I don't have to work one day and I can sleep until 8:00 or 9:00 if I feel like it. I do NOT want to have housekeeping bang on my door or just come in my room and wake me up. It would be more efficient- to only clean the rooms that needed/wanted cleaning. I think all hotels should adopt this policy!

Well, I'm feeling a little stoned right now, so I think I'm going to watch "American Beauty" now. I had other things that I wanted to write about, but perhaps I'll remember them later.

I'm so stoned, I am completely unaware of time. The clock says 5:10, but I don't know what that means, exactly.

Since I didn't do anything else productive yesterday, I'm glad I'm up early. I have a lot to do today as this coming week will be extremely busy. Today I need to read for theatre, research some stuff on "Doctor Faustus" (so I can be prepared for class tomorrow), clean up the apartment (so it's nice and clean when Neil gets here), get familiar with new software (so I can train David in a few weeks), and go through the mail and stretch while watching GH.

Paula and Harvey are coming up today, and I may or may not be meeting them for dinner at Kiiroi-Hana (depending on how much I get done today).

Tomorrow is classes and then am probably meeting Paula here in the early evening to watch GH (Neil and I are trying to get her to watch it more regularly- she likes it but is out of town too often to tape it consistently). Then I'll probably join them for dinner somewhere.

Tuesday I'm probably working at the Four Seasons (if they are busy and need help) and reading for theatre (and for human development, if I have the book yet, which I probably won't).

Wednesday morning I have class and then will be working the rest of the day at the Four Seasons.

Thursday I have classes and then will probably head over to the Four Seasons.

Friday-Sunday is the Four Seasons.

The following weekend Brian and Rebecca will be here and the weekend after that, I'm going down to Arlington. Hope I can find away to get the schoolwork done around those activities.

I talked to Eytan briefly yesterday. He's enjoying his classses. Glad he'll have schoolwork to do while I'm down there- it will give me time to get some reading done (which I can also do on the train).

Okay, time to go get cracking.

I think Harry Potter fans in Santa Rosa should go around telling people, "It's Santa RO'sa, not Santa RosA'".

I had some flashbacks the other night of hanging out in Orlando with Jon, Jeff, and Kim- the coffee house open mic night, the dance club in the Main St. area, the dance club further out in the burbs...

February 3 8:30 PM
Listening to: Tom Waits- "Rain Dogs"
Site of the Day: Finder Guy (find stuff in NYC)
Interesting News Story of the Day: Manning Goes Off on 'Idiot Kicker' Vanderjagt
Florida State Hands Duke Third Straight ACC Road Defeat
James Sits, Gets Interview with Deion as Team Barely Wins
Fifth of July, Ensemble Classic of Love and Loss, Opens Off-Bway Feb. 3
NASA to Redo Columbia Tile Analysis
Enron Creditors Sue Ex-Chairman Lay
Vatican Gives Two Thumbs Up to 'Potter'
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Classes were okay.

I went over to Paula and Harvey's room this evening to do a little work and bring them the new laptop. Then I had dinner with them, Carl, and Jeffrey. Our main conversation was about different cultures and the insects they eat (and other things not acceptable for eating in the US).

Tomorrow I'm still on standby.

I gave up on figuring out the clothes situation for this week. Hopefully I'll be able to come up with stuff each morning (and will be duplicating the pants since I know I don't have enough dress pants- one day maybe I'll actually get around to finding time [when it's not below freezing outside] to do something about that).

It's going to be a busy week, but I'm not stressing about it at all. Last October-December was busy. Compared to those few months, this week will be no big deal. Plus, I don't have to work on any papers this week, and that's really what gives me the most trouble.

I love this Waits album. It seems very Beat (as in Beatnik) to me. But maybe that's because I got into this album on my first cross-country road trip, when I was also into reading Kerouac, Ginsberg, et al. But the song "9th & Hennepin" really reminds me of some Beat poet reading in some dimly lit bar with everyone drinking cheap wine and smoking cigarettes.

I've gotten a few emails recently from Epinions members with questions (some about reviews I've written and some about Epinions in general).

But I did get there finally around 11:00. And things were crazy hectic over there as well (mostly with computer issues- serious computer issues that I just can't believe have been happening as long as they have).

Went to Kiiroi-Hana this evening with Maureen and Jeffrey. The service may not be great, but their food is. Tonight I tried one of Jeffrey's sea urchin rolls and liked it quite a bit (which surprised me).

I was originally only going to be needed tomorrow after 1:00, but now it's going to be so busy, they could use me in the morning as well. So, no theatre class for me tomorrow. I don't mind at all. I love the work and tomorrow's class won't be too important. I'm slightly nervous about the computer/network situation. I'm really not expecting for everything to go flawlessly, but if we can get through with the bare minimum of equipment and not have any major problems, I'll be happy.

I'm going to try to get to bed early since it'll be a busy day tomorrow. I just washed my hair so that will be one less thing to do tomorrow. Think I'll smoke a bowl to help me fall asleep.

I'll just deal with the emails that can't wait and save the less important stuff for Thursday (I'll have a few hours after classes and might even stay in that night if I have too much to do, rather than do the social thing).

Trivia question: Which former team became the Detroit Lions?
I'll put the answer up tomorrow (unless I don't write tomorrow, in which case I'll put the answer up the next time I write an entry).

February 6 6:00 PM
Listening to: Mazzy Star- "She Hangs Brightly"
Site of the Day: Coudal.com (Museum of Online Museums)
Interesting News Story of the Day: 60's Radicals Reunited, This Time as Ensemble
Academy Award Winner Kevin Spacey to Run London's Old Vic
Oklahoma! Will End Broadway Run on Feb. 23
West End Critics Circle Awards Announced; Mendes & Anything Goes Among Winners
US Air Traffic Delays Tumble in 2002
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Yesterday was busier than I'd ever seen. People and things were pouring in via fax, phone, email, and in person. And the Canada took an hour and a half longer than expected. The phone action was unbelievable!

Went to Trattoria dell' Arte last night with Maureen, Carl, Jeffrey, and Neil. I don't love that restaurant but it seems to be a universal favourite. I do like their halibut though, and I ordered the '99 Valpolicella which was delicious. It was a fun evening.

Today I feel like I'm getting Paula's cold. I sort of felt like I was getting a cold the past 2 mornings, but then I felt fine the rest of the days. Today I feel somewhat worse. So I went to my theatre class since, of course, attendence is required, but then I came home and rested (rather than go to my human development class) since the next few weeks are going to be very busy. Tonight Neil and I are getting Shun Lee delivery and then I'm hopefully going to bed early.

Tomorrow morning I'm going to Norma's with Maureen (and possibly others). Hope I'm feeling good enough to enjoy it.

Saw a promo for the new Disney "Music Man" today. I don't want to see it. I've never liked a non-animated Disney movie and even though I'm tempted to see certain aspects of it (certain scenes, the acting, the directing, the choreography...), I don't want to get irritated or upset by watching it.

Now I'm watching the past few GH's with Neil.

February 10 6:15 PM
Listening to: "Holst: The Planets"
Site of the Day: Historical Weapons
Interesting News Story of the Day: An Opening Is Set
Hearth Throbs (cozy restaurants in NYC)
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Friday was fairly quiet but a long day. I spent a quiet night at home with Neil.

Saturday didn't feel as exhausting as it really was, and I was full of energy at the end of the day. That evening I went to Teodora with Mike, Maureen, Neil, Carl, and Jeffrey.

Sunday I woke up with a sore throat but other than that, I felt fine. I took some Robitussin just in case and felt fine most of the day. That night all of us (Paula, Harvey, Neil, Maureen, Mike, Carl, and Jeffrey) went to DB Bistro. Wow- that place is amazing! The lobster bisque was like nothing I ever had before. Some things were a little too much, but it's worth it once in a rare while. It's a good group of people we have now- that made dinner even more enjoyable. The only thing that bothered me was that the waiters kept peeking around the corner at us through the entire meal- I don't like people watching me eat. Sometimes they stared at us for a full minute before going back to whatever they were doing. I don't know why they were doing that. It was creepy.

Today I woke up slightly sick again. I don't understand this illness, but I don't mind it. I feel slightly sick for a few hours each day (except for Saturday when I felt fine all day) and then feel fine the rest of the day.

Today I am exhausted. I wish I could spend tomorrow sleeping in and then catching up on my life, but I can't. I can do that on Wednesday though since it's Lincoln's birthday.

I did feel somewhat melancholy this morning when Neil left and I knew everyone else left. And I still feel a little melancholy (it was difficult choosing something to listen to tonight).

Tomorrow I'm going to look at several office spaces in midtown. Two I'm looking at around 11:00 and 2 I'm looking at around 3:00. Don't know what I'll do in between yet.

I don't think there was anything else too memorable about the last few days, so I'll go clean the apartment now, rest for a while, and then (hopefully) go to bed early.

And I'm not too happy about Maryland losing 2 games in a row. My prediction (without giving it too much thought) for them in the tournament? 6th seed losing in the Sweet 16.

I'm just too tired to finish cleaning the apartment, so I'll wake up early and do it tomorrow before I go look at office space.

Random Request: If anyone has an MP3 of "Making Love in a Subaru" by Damaskas, can you please send it my way?

February 11 6:00 PM
Listening to: Matchbox 20- "Mad Season"
Site of the Day: Fire & Ice Festival (Aurora, CO)
Interesting News Story of the Day: Bin Laden Tape Urges Iraqi Suicide Bombs
U.S. Plans for Two-Year Occupation of Iraq
New Complaint to EU on Microsoft Windows
U.S. Had Data Hinting of Okla. Bombing
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Now I'm planning on having a relaxing evening. I might even be bad and save replying to emails for tomorrow.

I love that I can stay home and get stuff done all day tomorrow. I don't understand why CUNY schools are off for not only President's Day but Lincoln's birthday, but I'm glad they are. I decided to check a few college websites and all 3 had classes on both Lincoln's birthday and President's Day.

Oh, I remembered to buy a Valentine's Day card for Abby today (wouldn't have thought about doing that, but Neil said I should). I went to CVS to drop off film and get her a card since I got to my second round of today's appointments a little early (the CVS was very close, which was important with the freezing temperatures). The Valentine's Day card section was small to begin with, but to make it more difficult, most of them were sold out. And to make it even worse still, 95% of them were gushy ones for a person to give to their significant other. And yes, it can get worse. Most of the 5% that weren't romantic were for family members other than a cousin (most of them were for mom, dad, son, or daughter). However, I did finally find a card where the subject was called "for a child" (or something like that). However, the card was in Spanish (the majority of the cards that were left were in Spanish). With my mental block against learning Spanish, I completely did not understand what the card said, but I assume it said something like "You're wonderful and sweet and special". However, Abby can not yet read, so she will not know what the card says; she'll only know that her cousin Casa sent her a Valentine's Day card. Actually, she won't even understand that much, but I guess she'll know that she's holding something colourful and that it's from her cousin Casa.

February 12 4:30 PM
Listening to: Kate & Anna McGarrigle- "McGarrigle Hour"
Site of the Day: Go Fundraising
Interesting News Story of the Day: A Glimpse of a Future in a New Kind of Light
Tenn. St. AD Phillips to Make History as First Female D-I Coach
N. Korea Missile Can Hit U.S., CIA Says
Long Day's Journey Gets the Plymouth Theatre on Broadway
Treasures Buried in Plain Sight
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Spent the morning dealing with a ton of email. So glad that's done.

Wow, I thought the Zagat music survey was fun to participate in, but now they have New York theatre (they only have 65 shows, but it's better than nothing). Actually, now that I think about it, this category seems pointless since shows open and close so quickly, but I guess they think it's worth listing some of the current and long-running shows. If they updated it every month, it would be completely worth it. Doing this music survey is bringing back so many memories of listening to : King Missile's "Happy Hour", Primus' "Sailing the Seas of Cheese", Pink Floyd's "Final Cut", Jane's Addiction's, "Jane's Addiction"...

Neil wanted me to put a link to my wishlist again. I might as well post my small but growing wishlist at Barnes and Noble.

I'm having a bad eye day today (can't really see well). Think it's time to change the contacts.

I didn't get much done on my theatre paper today. I'll have to deal with it on Friday though since I have a project for work to do this evening.

I've been feeling really young recently. I don't know if it's because my birthday is coming up and this is my brain's way of accepting it or if it's just a phase, but in some ways, I really feel like I'm 18 (and for some things, I want to be 18).

I'm going to try to fall asleep early tonight (early for me, anyway). I think I still need some more sleep to feel 100% back to my usual self, and I won't be getting much of it over the weekend.

I got about 7 hours of sleep again but woke up congested and my nose has been running all day. But other than that, I don't have any symptoms (although I'm more tired than usual), so that's good.

Rebecca called me this morning to tell me she's sick as well (who isn't sick right now?) and they don't want to risk coming up this weekend (especially after what happened last time they both came up- Brian spent the night in the emergency room). So I'm sorry they won't be here, but it does give me lots of time to get stuff done. For instance, tomorrow I can work rather than do my theatre paper and save the paper for Saturday. We decided the weekend of March 15th would work, so they'll hopefully make it up here then.

Not much else to say and this keyboard is irritating, so I'll stop here.

And I know they're somewhat careful about who/what goes in the Lincoln Tunnel, but only by car. Do they forget that a handful of terrorists can travel through the Lincoln Tunnel by train carrying explosives in their briefcases?

On a lighter note, I'm thinking about watching a movie tonight (I just don't want to watch anything with violence).

And it's strange, they have this character on who acts very child-like, so we're keeping with the child-like adults theme.

Okay, this Ross crying thing is a little much.

And now it's time for Will and Grace. I've never really liked this show and I don't like Demi Moore (who is a guest star tonight), but I think I'll watch it anyway because I feel like vegging on the couch.

I don't understand why Toyota is using monkeys in their commercials but they were fun to watch.

Yeah, I really don't like Will and Grace. Except for Will, I don't like any of the characters.

Either I'm really stoned or they just had a really funny line:
Will: We should get going. Come on, I'll walk you.
Jack: That's okay, I went before we left.

And now I'm going to stop writing every thought that goes through my mind.

Oh, but I absolutely have to write this:
This is the third thing I'm watching that has child-like adults. Jack found his babysitter from when he was a kid and he reverts back to a child when hanging out with her. This is too much of a coincidence. I feel like something is telling me it's okay to feel child-like once in a while.

One more question:
Why is this country obsessed with Michael Jackson? Or is it the media that wants us to be obsessed with Michael Jackson? Or does Michael Jackson want us to be obsessed with Michael Jackson?

And I think I'll try "The Homework Song" the next time I don't want to write a paper.

Sit-coms can't quit while they're ahead. It starts out reasonably funny and then always goes at least one step too far.

I just took a handwriting analysis test and it was completely right. So I took it again and gave different answers and some of them were off. I took it one more time with different answers and most of them were off. So handwriting analysis tests can really work.

And now I think I'll try to get to bed so I can get a full night of sleep and not want to sleep in for too long tomorrow morning.

February 14 3:30 PM
Listening to: Yello- "One Second"
Site of the Day: Gulf War Game
Interesting News Story of the Day: Blake Seals Deal as Terps Bounce Back from Consecutive Losses
Ready Wake Forest Erupts, Outlasts Duke in 2OT
West End's Olivier Award Winners Announced Feb. 14
Urban Cowboy Company Struts Its Stuff, and Shows Some Skin, at Press Preview
Kristin Scott Thomas, Kate Burton and Madeleine Worrall Are Three Sisters in Spring London Production (wish I could see this)
Broderick and Chenoweth Give Iowa a Try in Music Man TV Movie, Feb. 16
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Yesterday GH got interrupted by a special report and today I forgot to put it on the right channel for taping until halfway through the show. And of course I'm missing some of the better scenes. Oh well, not a big deal.

Tonight is They Might Be Giants with Jennifer (and her brother, who is in town).

There are 2 shows that I want to see and tomorrow looks like a good day to do one of them. I either want to see "Tartuffe" (since we're reading it this semester, and I thought it would be a good idea to see a production of it but I could also rent the film from TLA) or "De La Guarda" (since I thought it would be fun to see that show after eating brownies). But I don't know if I'll do either of those things since it's always so hard to get myself out of the apartment (especially in this freezing weather). I could also see Mrs. Warren's Profession for free tomorrow night, but I think I'll skip that one as well.

February 15 5:00 PM
Listening to: King Missile- "They"
Site of the Day: Heavy Metal Love Haikus
Interesting News Story of the Day: Millions Join Anti-Iraq War Protests Worldwide
U.S., Britain Reworking Iraq Resolution
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Last night was great fun! As I was walking there, I tried to get into my high school frame of mind. It was difficult, trying to remember how I felt and acted then, but at certain moments, I definitely felt like I could have been in high school. The show itself was great. We had fantastic seats, they played some good songs (the ones I knew weren't my favourites, but they were still fun to hear again- ones like "Dig My Grave" and "Mammals"- I had forgotten all about those), and the drummer was cute and fun to watch (definitely something I would have liked watching when I was in high school). And they gave out free "People are Wrong" CDs at the end. Now I really wish I didn't buy the stupid thing. I was upset they didn't have my favourite song on it and it just wasn't worth the price. Oh well. I ate a brownie before I left and it definitely effected me during part of the show. I really did feel like I was in high school (not that I got stoned very often in high school, but shortly after, I did). And as I was walking home, I tried again to remember what I felt like in high school when walking somewhere. That didn't work as well, since I was usually driving home from places in high school, but I did walk around the city when I first moved up here, so I tried to capture some of that. If I was truly going to live like I would have in high school, I would have gone to a dance club and not gone home at 11:00, but it was cold and I wanted to be at home.

I got a compliment from Michael Johnson via Paula the other day. He was talking about how everyone was doing with the new program and said that he wished I was there full time since I was the one who really understood it. Nice to know someone knows I know what I'm doing.

And can anyone tell me why our government is not more concerned about North Korea. It seems like a simple solution (to negotiate), but they are obviously only concerned about Iraq and they can't think about 2 foreign issues at once, I guess. But North Korea selling nuclear weapons to terrorist groups seems obviously like the greater concern. So if anyone can explain to me why we're not doing anything abour North Korea, please share- I'd love to understand.

I slept a lot last night! I went to sleep around 2:00 AM and woke up at noon (with some waking up in between but kept going back to sleep). Now I feel 100% back to normal.

Today I cleaned the apartment a little, started on my theatre paper and finished talking to Rebecca about Daniel & Naomi's wedding gift (so she could order it today). And it's already evening- that's what happens when you sleep till noon.

And today I also looked out my window quite a bit. There were people protesting outside for a good 4 hours. They were marching up 3rd, and congregating on 3rd and Lex. The police were blocking off Lex, then they blocked off 3rd, then they unblocked Lex, then they unblocked 3rd. People just stood in the intersection of 57th & 3rd for a while and the traffic director moved them every once in a while so cars could get through. Then around 4:00, all the people left and the cops mostly left (although there were about 8 police vehicles lined up on 57th for a while- they're gone now). Why were they around my neighbourhood? I thought they would concentrate around the UN or Times Square or something. They were loud.

I also talked to Rebecca about coming here in March. Rose has an audition for an opera company (or something like that) and would like to stay here (although she can also stay with some friends in Brooklyn) and if Rose stays here, Rebecca would want to visit at the same time. That sounds perfect except I already told Brian and Rebecca they could come up here that weekend. I called them, but they weren't home. Hopefully the weekend after the 15th will work for them, and then I could have guests 2 weekends in a row. I'll have to learn how to do work while I have people staying here. It's always so tempting to hang out with them.

Recently, I've wanting to play the bassoon again.

The rest of the day I'll try to finish (or at least get a good chunk of it done) my paper and then relax and think young thoughts.

Tonight I want to get stoned and write like I used to in high school. I won't even type since I want to capture, as close as I can, the exact feelings I had in high school. I don't have any incense to burn, but I can at least light candles and play The Doors (I remember listening to them a lot when I wrote at home). But I also remember writing more when I wasn't at home. I would write in Dunkin Donuts (since those were one of the few places open at 2:00 AM), in theatres while waiting for rehearsal to start, hotel lobbies (at some point I decided that was an inexpensive and quiet place to write), at the beach (the 2 times I went when I was in my teens), and various other places. I know I shouldn't focus so much on my past that I forget about my future, but I'm just trying to capture my thoughts and feelings as a teen and then try to feel that way in my present.

I wonder if this current phase will make it difficult to find a significant other. Not that I'm actively looking, but I shouldn't keep that issue on the back burner for too much longer. It's too much to think about today. I just started this little phase. I'll see how it goes first before worrying about a lack of significant other.

Oh, but one thing about the significant other issue: Part of me thinks that one day the right person will come along and I'll find happiness (or at least contentment) with that person. Part of me thinks that I should be actively looking, the right person won't just randomly walk into my life. Part of me would like to have children in the somewhat near future (at least before I'm 36). Part of me thinks I should just let things happen and my life will take the direction it is supposed to take. Part of me worries I'll be alone for the majority of my life. Part of me wonders if that's such a bad thing (as long as I have friends around and I can count on them). In general, I'm content with my life. Why should I go and try to change it? If something was really wrong or if I needed something, then I could work on changing it. Until then, shouldn't I just be happy with the way my life is? Do I need to work on finding a significant other if I'm happy (for the most part) without one? I hardly ever even think about this issue (maybe 4-5 times a year). If it was something I thought about on a weekly basis, then maybe I should do something about it. So I think I've come to the conclusion (the conclusion until the next time I think about it, anyway) that I'll just let nature take its course and when the time is right, I'll meet someone and things will just fall into place (I hope).

And on that note, I should go eat something since all I had today was peanut butter on a bagel.

Brian just called me back to tell me that the weekend of March 22nd will work for them. We talked for a half an hour. I don't remember the last time I talked to him on the phone for more than a minute. When I lived in Baltimore, we used to talk on the phone for hours, especially on Thursday nights when we would watch Must See TV and talk to each other during commercials. Maybe we only did that a few times, but it stands out in my memory. I didn't have a cordless phone and my phone was in the bedroom and TV in the living room (at least that's how it was when I was living on Cedarcroft Rd.), so I think I used to either put down the phone and come back during commercials or I would just keep calling him during commercials. Don't remember the details, just that we did that occasionally. And tonight we talked about the kinds of things we would have talked about back then- how things work, mini-debates (tonight was talent vs. creativity) ... It was fun.

I also talked to Harvey for a while tonight (I can't believe my phone battery isn't giving me trouble- I've talked less and it ran out of juice completely, tonight it's still almost completely charged). I guess being snowed in makes people want to talk on the phone more. Harvey and I discussed the music industry (I told him all of my knowledge from the class I took last semester- I remembered almost everything I learned), the snow, business/profits...

Yes, today has been a good day.

I feel sexy tonight.

Last week, Allan Katz asked me if I was married yet. Here is my new answer for the next time someone asks me this:
It's easy to become married. 2.3 million people do it a year. If you want to pressure me to become something, hey, why not pick something a little more challenging? Like an astrophysicist.

It did snow more than it looks like from my window, but barely. I walked around a little and the only accumulation of snow in certain areas were from shoveling and plowing piles. But because of those piles, the curbs were a little deep (about to my mid-calf). Otherwise, the sidewalks and roads were almost perfectly clear. I should have walked over to the park so I could walk around in the real snow, but I wasn't too motivated to do that. Maybe I'll walk over there on Wednesday during my break. I'm assuming there will still be enough snow then to appreciate.

Why is there always so much banging and scraping coming from next door?

I think my favourite line from "Reefer Madness" is in "Listen to Jesus, Jimmy"

And of course I LOVE "Little Mary Sunshine".

February 18 6:30 PM
Listening to: The Beatles- "Abbey Road"
Site of the Day: New Paltz Chamber of Commerce
Interesting News Story of the Day: More Than 250 Arrested in NYC Protests
S. Korea Subway Arson Kills at Least 120
Proustian Music: Nelson & Gordon's Albertine Christens Horizons' New Home (going to see this Thursday)
New Brooklyn Musical to World Premiere in Denver in Spring 2003
Bill to Pay Nebraska Football Players Advances to Debate
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They really do clear it quickly. When I woke up this morning, the streets were entirely clear as were the sidewalks. There are piles on the curbs (but pathways are cleared through them so people can walk from the sidewalks to the streets without climbing over piles), but that's the only snow I see besides some on the roofs.

I finished my paper. This one really wasn't that bad. I'm so lucky with my classes this semester.

Thursday I'm going in early to talk to the theatre advisor about how to work on the show this semester and then ask when I should send my resumes and cover letters for a summer internship.

And it'll be nice not to have human development on Thursday. Then I can go home in between school and "My Life with Albertine" and pack for the weekend.

Last night I decided to keep my tape recorder by my bed and recorded some thoughts and some tunes before I fell asleep. Nothing too interesting, but maybe if I keep it by my bed, something interesting will strike eventually.

I'm in the mood to watch a movie tonight. And I think I might actually watch one this time. Now I just need to figure out what to watch.

And is H&R Block the only tax preparation company who has enough money for advertising? Do people know that H&R Block is not the only place to take care of their taxes?

I found a place for Eytan and I to karaoke in Arlington Friday night- Freddie's Beach Bar. He said he would go; now I just have to make sure he sings.

No sooner did I just write that last paragraph, did Eytan send me another email. His friend is having a potluck Friday night, so I think he wants to do that rather than karaoke. Not that I blame him. Guess I'll have to find someone else for karaoke.

February 19 6:30 PM
Listening to: Jethro Tull- "Nightcap"
Site of the Day: Views Of
Interesting News Story of the Day: HoJo's to Go? Say It Ain't So (I look exactly like the girl in the 3rd picture on the right- the one at the booth)
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Today I went to class, came home, tweaked my paper a little (since today she informed us that we should have some citations), dealt with the mail, and paid bills.

Lots of checks have come in the mail recently (always a good thing). Definitely need to make a trip to the bank tomorrow (which is perfect since I need to take out money for my trip down to Arlington this weekend).

I don't have time to watch "Chelsea Walls" before I leave for Arlington, but at least it will be here when I get back. Maybe I'll watch it the weekend after next.

Tonight I will eat dinner, watch GH, work a little, and then try to get to bed early (since I didn't get much sleep last night and have to get up super-early tomorrow).

I found another tape last night labeled "stuff". I think it might be from my road trip in '99. I talked and sang on 2 tapes during that trip but thought all my tapes are at Paula and Harvey's. I'm not going to listen to it tonight since I won't get to sleep early that way. Guess I'll listen to it sometime next week.

I feel like I'm running around with not enough time to do everything before I leave (and I feel like I'll forget something, although I'm impressed with how many odds and ends I have remembered so far). The main reason I feel this way is because of the show I'm seeing tomorrow night. It would be nice to have the entire evening at home to finish everything up, but that's not possible. At least I'll be home around 12:30 (instead of 4:30) and can do stuff until I have to leave for the theatre.

The weather was gorgeous today (as it often is after a snowstorm). The sun was out, it was warmish, and the wind was practically non-existant. Gorgeous.

My dinner just arrived so I'll stop writing now.

February 20 4:00 PM
Listening to: Gentle Giant- "King Biscuit Flower Hour"
Site of the Day: Study Abroad
Interesting News Story of the Day: Surging Duke Avenges Early Loss to Maryland (figures)
N. Korean Jet Briefly Enters S. Korea
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Last night I was searching for information on Enneagrams and Google found an interesting site for me. In the summary, it said, "Come learn to be a clown for Jesus!". Of course I had to click on that to see what the hell this thing was all about. Here's the description of a course you can take at the Congregational Leaders Workshop (they did offer an Enneagram class as well):
5. Clowning for the Lord
Learn about the history and tradition of clowning from a professional clown! Find your own clown face, learn how to make balloon animals and hats, discover the art of costuming through thrift stores, learn the basics of performing a gospel magic show for church school or special events. Come learn to be a clown for Jesus!

Today was a day that everyone was running late (except me). I waited for almost 45 minutes to talk to the theatre advisor (I did finally talk to her though and still had about 15 minutes to spare before class), my theatre professor was late (she said the traffic was horrible and it took almost an hour to get across the park). Katie was stuck in the same traffic and got to class for the last 15 minutes. I am lucky to have such a short commute to school (although it wouldn't hurt to be late once in a while).

The theatre advisor told me to talk to David about working on the show (guess I'll do that next Wednesday) and I should send me resume and cover letters by the beginning of March. Well, mine might be a little later than that. I hope that doesn't hurt me in finding an internship. I don't think it will since I've seen casting internship opportunities for the summer listed in April, so either all the resumes they received weren't worthwhile or people don't apply as early for casting internships. I really have no idea. If I don't get an internship for the summer, it won't be the end of the world (but I seriously hope that doesn't happen).

There was a lot of emergency vehicles going by my building yesterday.

So I'm mostly packed for the weekend. Looking forward to it even though it's supposed to rain most of the time.

Am I too independent to fall in love? Nothing has happened that caused me to ask this question, it just came to mind randomly.

Soon, I'm off for "My Life with Albertine" at Playwrights Horizon's new theatre. Tomorrow I head down to Arlington. Everytime I hear the word "Arlington", I think of the song by Emmet Swimming of the same name. Maybe they'll actually be playing a show the next time I'm in town (though that won't be for a while). I could have seen them on New Years Eve, but I don't like being out that night. I was much happier staying in at Jon & Michelle's.

Well, "My Life with Albertine" got better in the second act, but wasn't amazing. The music was very repetative (I think there were 5 reprises of 4-5 songs) but maybe they were trying to match the music with the language- much of the book/lyrics were repetative as well, but I'm assuming that is how Proust wrote and they were just quoting him (as it was based on his life and work). I wouldn't mind repetative music if I enjoyed the music, but I found many of the songs quite dull. I enjoyed the intimate theatrical presentation (as in, a play within a play) and most of the cast (I didn't care for Chad Kimball's voice though). I was extremely attracted to Kelli O'Hara- she was positively radiant! And I definitely enjoyed the "girls scenes" (although they could have been sexier). And it was fun going to the inaugural show in Playwrights Horizons new space.

However, to my horror, this show made me cry. It wasn't entirely because of the subject matter, I think I just am more emotional around my birthday (I remember crying during "Aida" when I saw it just before my birthday). Now I'm scared to see what will happen tonight. I doubt "110 in the Shade" will bring tears to my eyes, but the fact that I'll be in the theatre where I saw "Side Show" and the fact that I get emotional around my birthday doesn't make me hopeful for a tear-free performance. I liked it much better when I absolutely never cried in public (those days are over, I guess).

No, you know what? Those days are NOT over! I am going to have control over my emotions in public, starting tonight.

Anyway, now I'm all packed and ready to head over to Penn Station (and not so ready to deal with delays and crowded trains).

February 24 4:30 PM
Listening to: Yaz- "You and Me Both"
Site of the Day: Jay Records
Interesting News Story of the Day: Unhappy Math in Car Rentals
Why Stage O'Neill Again? 'To Hear the Truth Again'
Yes, Theater Is Important
Fabulous? Certainly. An Invalid? Maybe Not.
An Englishman's Accent on America
Looking for a Conscience
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Getting to the train station on Friday was not fun. Traffic was horrendous, streets were blocked off, and I wound up getting out of the cab at 5th & 29th (he had to go that far down because the previous few streets were blocked off or jammed) and walked to Penn Station from there. At least it wasn't raining.

Fortunately, I had an amazing train experience. It left on time, got in 5 minutes early, and I had 2 seats to myself for the entire trip! That's never happened to me before!

I met up with Eytan after having a drink at the Ritz Carlton in Pentagon City (and chatted with the bartender and another woman, who worked in the area, at the bar). We had dinner at a Mexican restaurant in Shirlington and then headed over to the Signature Theatre.

The show got off to a slow & cheesy start (like many musicals do) but got better as it went along. Matt Bogart had a bit of an off night but everyone else was fine. The highlight was Jacquelyn Piro as Lizzie. Every single part of her is involved in the role. I'd love to see her do a non-musical. Almost all of the seating is reserved for season subscribers, which is really frustrating. But Friday was a good-luck day for me, and 2 minutes before 8:00, I asked the usher if we could move to the 2 reserved seats in the front. And we did! So I could actually see the show (which was especially nice since not only were the other seats at an odd angle, I was having a bad-eye-day and could barely see anything that wasn't right in front of me).

After the show, we went to Freddie's for karaoke. I only got to sing once since it was crowded and we didn't get there until 11:00, but at least I got to sing once and did a good job with it. I sang White Rabbit and people loved it. Other people who sang barely got applause, but I had 5 people come up to me and tell me how good I was. I haven't karaoked since I lived in Phoenix, and I forgot how good it felt to get compliments from strangers. I've missed singing in public.

I barely got any sleep Friday night since the rain was so loud, it kept waking me up. Not nice.

Saturday Eytan and I worked out in his apartment (that was fun) and then went to Rappahannock (a coffee shop a few blocks from his apartment). I didn't get much studying done, but I had an enjoyable afternoon of looking out the window from where we were sitting at the counter, chatting with Eytan, listening to the oldies music playing, and occasionally looking at the human development material that would be on the test.

I realised I hadn't felt that relaxed since '96, when Eytan, Terry, and I used to hang out all the time in Blacksburg (although I might have felt that way for a day or two sometime in between then and now and I just don't remember it). I can't exactly explain the feeling, but I truly felt young and free! Something about hanging out on a lazy Saturday afternoon with someone you feel completely comfortable with... It was wonderful!

Then we went to Annapolis. It was drizzling and really foggy and to add to the uncomfortable ride there, Eytan's gas tank was almost empty and when we finally got to a safe area where we didn't mind stopping to get gas, there weren't any stations. Fortunately, we made it to Annapolis without completely running out. Unfortunately, when we got to Borders, there was a sign on the door that they were closed for safety. Earlier that day, the roof of the Toys R Us in Hyattsville collapsed and the fire marshal decided that they should close the Annapolis Mall that evening. So we went all the way there for nothing.

So we went back to Freddie's. Oh, and I had 2 brownies before we left for Annapolis, and they kicked in about 10 minutes before we were back in Arlington. By the time we were at Freddie's, I was completely stoned (like I was the first time I tried the brownies- I can't believe I was still eating the same batch I made 3 weeks ago- they are stale but are okay to eat after microwaving for a few seconds). I got a coke so I would be able to sing, but it didn't help. I just wanted to go back to Eytan's and relax. Eytan definitely wanted to go home since he had a long day ahead of him on Sunday, so we left about an hour after we got there. I was so glad I was with him instead of almost anyone else. I really do feel comfortable with him even though he can be frustrating to talk to since he zones out so much of the time.

What else do I remember from Saturday night? I remember being scared in the car since it was foggy and rainy and northern VA drivers are horrible. I remember being scared to cross the street since the don't walk signs are always lit (this is a suburb, they don't expect many pedestrians) and it was a major street with constant traffic. Even though the cars had a red light, I was still scared to cross since I didn't know when the light was going to change. Being stoned really heightens your perceptions, but I think I would have been slightly nervous crossing the street with no walk sign on a rainy/foggy night. I also remember getting back to Eytan's and decided that since I didn't get to sing at Freddie's, I would sing outside his building. I stood outside his building singing for a while and thought about when I was 16 and was caught singing in the stairwell of a hotel in northern VA. The guy who caught me was a young, attractive filmmaker who thought a young woman singing in a stairwell would make a great scene in a movie. I guess that was the last time I sang in public (besides in a performance or karaoke). It was fun doing something I hadn't done since I was 16, and it contributed to my act-young-and-feel-young phase as well.

Sunday morning, I went with Eytan to the Java Shack (where he works). I was absolutely exhausted! The latte he made me didn't help at all. It was fun hanging out there though. I got some studying done (finally) and eavesdropped on other people's conversations. It's nice to know people still have intelligent conversations- one table was discussing personality theories and if I had more time, I would have gone over and joined them (bringing my human development textbook with me). I like the Java Shack and wish I had one like it near me. It has a nice community feel, and it was fun people-watching.

While I was there, it was pouring/sleeting/snowing. Fortunately, when it came time to walk to the Metro, the percipitation slowed down. However, the wind was ridiculous! Eytan said there was going to be up to 60mph wind gusts, and he was right. I was already completely exhausted, and by the time I got to Union Station, I was ready to fall asleep.

But of course the train was packed. They closed the NJ Turnpike, the airports had delays, so how else were people going to get to New York? The train! I sat next to an eccentric American woman who lived in Spain. We talked on and off throughout the trip about how poor the trains were in this country, children, our families, and travel.

And of course when we got to Penn Station, it was a zoo inside and out. They were setting up for the Grammys and there was MAJOR security EVERYWHERE with much of the area blocked off! I walked with the eccentric woman up a few blocks and we shared a taxi since there was a serious shortage of them and who knows when another one would come along.

Today I've had a headache most of the afternoon and I'm still really tired. Maybe I can get to bed early tonight if I can finish everything quickly (which is why I shoudn't have taken the time for this entry, but too late now). Or maybe I'll save some things for tomorrow. Yes, that's what I'll do. Tonight I will only clean the apartment. do a little work, and make a schedule for tomorrow. Then hopefully I can get some sleep tonight (even though I have to wake up early tomorrow).

February 25 11:00 AM
Listening to: U2- Achtung Baby
Site of the Day: FieldTrip.com
Interesting News Story of the Day: Saddam Wants Bush Debate, Belittles U.N.
"Chicago" The Movie Sing Along Hits New York City, March 6
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Marcell and I have been trying to find a time to go see a movie (since we can see all the ones that are nominated for free with her SAG card), but so far, we haven't found anything that will work for both of us. Hopefully we can go see one tomorrow night though.

And I forgot to mention yesterday- I've heard Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On" twice last week- some guy was playing it on the sax while I waiting for the 6 train at 59th St. and there was a guy playing it on the piano at the Ritz Carlton in Pentagon City. Haven't heard it since it was popular in '97, why is around so much again?

And I also forgot to mention that last weekend was quite a workout for my ID. I keep it in my wallet which has a window so you don't have to take it out, but I had to take it out almost every time I was in a restaurant/bar over the weekend. And the last time was a bit ridiculous. There is a doorman at Freddie's that checks IDs as you go in. Then when Eytan and I went to find a seat at the bar, before we could order drinks, the bartender asked for our IDs. He took mine and looked at it for a while and then started asking me questions about what I do in New York. Eytan thought that maybe the bartender thought it was a fake ID. And after all that, I ordered a coke- the bartender just laughed.

Paula and Harvey are going to Matt & Sylvia's for dinner tonight. A few other people will be there as well. I'm interested to hear how it was.

I'm going to try to take it easy today and see if I can get over this tired-all-the-time thing. Unless Marcell wants to go to a movie tonight (I'm sure she would have called me already if she did), I'm not going out. I'll just clean, work, and rest.

I finally get my wonderful Sundays back starting this Sunday- the new Six Feet Under seasons starts! I'm going to make Sunday a day for myself. I'll sleep in, maybe finish "Spies" (or at least read some more of it, I've never taken this long to read a book), relax, and watch Six Feet Under. I'll do other things in between, but nothing that I don't feel like doing (if I can help it).

Harvey and Paula should be home soon. Think I'll call to see what tonight was like.

February 28 2:00 PM
Listening to: Tori Amos- "To Venus and Back"
Site of the Day: String Theory
Interesting News Story of the Day: A Sad Ballad for the Water-Pipe Cafes of Astoria
TV's 'Mr. Rogers' Dead of Stomach Cancer at 74
Maryland Wraps Up Home Season with Blowout
ROWLING IN THE D'OH!
World Trade Center plan chosen
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Except for the fact that I was tired the entire day, Wednesday was fun. Went to Leshko's with the Lunch Club and then most of us headed over to Ace Bar. I actually won a game of pool. I don't know how I played so well. Then I hung out with Mike, Rose, and PJ for a while until it was time to head up to the UWS to meet Marcell. We had dinner at Caridad.

But I was exhausted all day. I've been like this since I woke up Sunday morning at Eytan's. I don't know what's wrong with me. Maxine mentioned that it could be the winter- dark and cold and all that. I like that theory. I hope nothing is seriously wrong with me. I don't have any symptoms. Maybe it's part of the flu. I had the sore throat a few weeks ago and now I'm having the exhaustion. I know that makes no sense. I hope I get my energy back soon though.

We got our theatre papers back yesterday. She is a tough grader! She said she wrote comments all over our papers to encourage us to re-write them for a better grade. I don't know if I feel like re-writing this thing- it's not mandatory. I could be fine with a B-, but I'm afraid she'll continue giving me low grades if I don't re-write this paper since she'll think I'm lazy or something (which I am). I just want to get through school in the easiest way possible. I don't need to write scholarly papers. I doubt I'll re-write and if she wants to give me a C for the semester, so be it. At least it's one more class out of the way.

I didn't stay for human development yesterday, so I don't know if we got our tests back. I was just so exhausted, I couldn't make it.

And I almost didn't make it to "String Fever" last night, but I finally dragged myself out and fortunately there wasn't any traffic, so I got there early. I'm glad I made myself go. There still wasn't enough physics content for my liking, but it was well acted and I completely got into the story. I didn't think I could because I was so tired, but I didn't zone out once. And was nice to hear about string theory in a play. I love science-related plays!

Random comment: PJ Clarke's reopened!

My Jones Soda bottle cap today said "a friend will soon bring you a present". Does that include family? Cause it sounds like my family might be bringing themselves up here next weekend for my birthday. That would be a wonderful present- having Harvey, Paula, Neil, Maxine, and Abby up here.

Eric sent me an email and mentioned that he might be coming up to New York to play a show in the fall. Everyone in the New York area reading this should check out his website and sign up on his email list (no spam at all- he only sends emails when there is news) so you can find out when he's playing. And then if he actually does do a show up here, you all have to come out and show your support for a talented singer/songwriter!

Am I scared of a long term relationship? I was thinking about that Wednesday morning and then had a discussion about relationships with Mike, Rose, and PJ Wednesday afternoon. In fact, I don't think it's just long term relationships that I'm afraid of. I think it's commiting to anything long term. I don't know why, I can just look at the paterns in my life (short term jobs, short term living arrangements, short term friendships...). Am I missing the commintment gene? I'm too tired to think about it in depth right now, but maybe I'll think about it one day soon.

I found more to add to my Sunday activities. I can watch the first half of the Maryland game right before Six Feet Under.

I went to sleep late last night but still mananged to sleep about 7 hours. I'm going to try to get in bed before midnight tonight and sleep as late as I can tomorrow morning. I'm determined to get tons of sleep this weekend and then feel back to my usual self on Monday. Although, maybe I'm sleeping too much. Guess I'll find out next week when I don't have huge amounts of time to devote to sleeping. If I feel back to my usual self next week, I'll know I was sleeping too much (too much meaning 6-7 hours). That doesn't sound like it makes sense though. Maybe it is the winter. Maybe part of me is sick of winter and is making me exhausted all the time. That makes more sense, although it's never happened to me before. I hope this doesn't happen every year, if it is the winter making me feel this way. I decided to email Sylvia to ask her if she gets this way in the winter. We have the same energy levels, so if she gets more tired in the winter, I'll assume that this is what is making me feel this way. Maybe it's because I'm getting older (I HATE saying that).

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