DECEMBER

I can't believe it's really December! Do I start every entry at the first of the month like this? I guess this is the only way I have to track time so it always surprises me when all that time has gone by.

Shopping online is easier than shopping in a store when I'm buying things I'm used to buying (CDs, books, airline tickets, etc). When buying things I'm not used to buying (TVs, Furniture, etc) it's as hard as offline shopping. I finally started purchasing linens and in the middle of the transaction, Netscape shut down. So now I have to start again. I hate this.

Last night Matt, Brie, and I went to meet Bob (Brie's friend) and his wife at Eribertos (or however that little Mexican place is spelled) for dinner. He's starting off as a free lance web designer and had some questions. So I had two conversations with newby web designers in one day. He sent me an email this morning asking some more questions. Very nice guy. He reminded me of Eric (from Liberty Showcase) except Bob is probably taller (and Eric was pretty tall), but they have the same voice.

Obsessive/Compulsive- One of my solitaire games ended when you almost win but all the cards you pulled down from the pile or every pile except one is over-turned. I felt like I was cheated out of a win so I decided that I can't stop playing now until I win for real. Why do I do this? It's so irrational.

I have Journey's, "Open Arms", in my head. Or at least I think it's Journey. I haven't heard this song in years, why did it pop in my head?

Things I have left to do before I move:
- Call Qwest
- Call APS
- Call Cox
- Notify everyone that needs my change of address (this should take most of one day)
- Pack
- Mail Christmas cards
- Get gift for Maxine
- Buy furniture, a TV, and linens
- Pay rent and break lease
- Call NY DMV
- Call CUNY credit union to see if I can join
- Call Rent-A-Wreck
- Buy travel alarm clock
- Buy notebook computer
- Store files and emails
- Laundry
- Clean apartment
I think that's it, although I'm sure I'm leaving out a thing or two. Whenever I list things, they don't look as bad as I thought they were. I think I'll relax tonight and watch one of the movies I rented. The only thing on that list that I'll do today is pay rent and break the lease. Oh, and buy linens and maybe a TV and if I'm really ambitious and crazy I'll buy the furniture too.

I forgot to mention earlier... When Neil went to the Geneology Building he found a little on our family. It was submitted by his Aunt (my Great-Aunt) when she joined the Mormon church. We didn't even know she joined the church since her family stopped speaking to her when she married a Philippino. I'd still like to know if I have any relatives left in County Cork.

I wrote an Epinion on Park City today. I decided to write about everything in one epinion instead of a few different ones. I didn't think I could say enough about each thing to have separate epinions. I still really want to write one on "Copenhagen", "Gore Vidal's- The Best Man", and the new Once Hush album (maybe).

I was watching a few minutes of the Army/Navy game and Mayor O'Mally saying Baltimore is a great place for the game and that they have a good shot for the Olympics too. Sorry, but I have to disagree Mr. O'Mally, I don't think Baltimore/Washington is the best place for the Olympics. There's already enough traffic problems in the area. Although, I guess that's a problem everywhere. Not Park City though- there was a lot of construction in Salt Lake, but they seemed to have everything under control and traffic isn't an issue there. I think Baltimore/Washington doesn't have lodging. If they add a few hotels in the Laurel/College Park/Columbia area, then it might be okay. Columbia could use some more hotels anyway. They only have a Sheraton and a Holiday Inn. I just hope the Olympics aren't in New York. New York has enough craziness with Sports and parades and New Years Eve... But the 4th quarter of the Army/Navy game is pretty good. Army just turned over the ball with 6 minutes left in the game. I think I'll go finish watching.

Shoot, now that the Army/Navy game is over, the UNC/Kentucky basketball game is on. It just took Kentucky 3 minutes and 48 seconds to get their first shot of the game. North Carolina already had 7 points. I really want to watch this since I couldn't watch my Terps beat Michigan this morning. I can't sit around watching sports all day. I'm going to want to watch football tomorrow and I have a ton of things I need to do. Maybe I'll watch the end of the 2nd half- that's fair.

This morning I looked around CompUSA and Circuit City at notebook computers. I really hate CompUSA- they have terrible service (it's a good thing I know what I'm looking at, I would tell people who don't know much about computers to stay away), high prices, and not a very big selection. I like Circuit City much better. I talked to a knowledgeable salemen about receivers and speakers (for the stereo system I'm working on) and had a not-so-knowledgeable salesmen talk to me about their notebook computers. I think I'm really leaning towards the Dell Inspiron or possibly the IBM Think Pad if I can't rationalise spending the money for the Dell.

I really like this song, "Fuzzy", by Grant Lee Buffalo. It's kind of country sounding but in a mellow, Chris Isaak kind of way.

Last night I purchased linens and a TV (Magnavox 25"). As for furniture, I'm irritated that most things come unassembled. There are only a few things that come preassembled (and not outrageously expensive) and I'm not thrilled with the choices. One store told me he could refer me to assembly services so now I'm waiting to hear back from him about cost. Hopefully, it's not too much since I really like some of the unassembled stuff.

I talked to Eytan today who told me a little about his 10 year high school reunion. He said that Daniel was there. I'm surprised he would go. Eytan said that when he walked in, he felt calm and at peace with his high school experience. Wow! Maybe I will go to mine.

Hmm... Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick will be in "The Producers" this spring- I'll have to check that out. I can't wait to be living in New York.

Matt & Brie are almost finished moving out. She invited me to their new place for dinner tonight. I guess they're good at setting up an apartment quickly. I guess it helps when you're only moving down the street. She also wants to karaoke tonight. Sounds good to me- I need to karaoke at least one more time before I move.

Damn ice cream truck is going around my parking lot. Another good thing about New York. Of course there's enough street noise there that you wouldn't even notice an ice cream truck. But I live on the 24th floor and even with the windows open, you can't hear too much street noise.

This is what I wrote last night at midnight but didn't feel like doing a journal entry:
Had dinner at Ernie's, not Brie's. I guess she wasn't ready to make dinner in her new place. Ernie's was fun, but not as fun as last time. There was a large party there and while they were interesting people to watch, they were all very irritating. There was tambourine woman who had to be in front of the video camera at all times, drunk man who smiled and sang to everyone at the bar including singing to the person singing (it was very distracting while trying to sing), the two blond women who were all over each other, little wallflower woman who tried to dance which was very amusing to watch... I went there with Brie, Matt, and Matt's friend Jason who was rather boring. Brie and I got to sing two songs and then we left. Matt got very drunk! I lost my voice a little bit from trying to scream over all the noise to be heard.

I was just reading an Epinion on Dunkin' Donuts and the woman mentioned "Dunkachino"! AAAAAHHHHHHH!! One Denis Leary forgot to mention on his coffee rant.

I really do love The Beta Band's, "Dry the Rain". What a great tune! Just makes you smile and enjoy the moment. Or maybe I'm just odd.

Napster is now playing "Blow Gabriel" from "Anything Goes". For a few seconds, I thought I heard Sue (the woman who played Reno in the production I was in). I wish it was Sue, she had a perfect voice for the part. I miss Sue. I really do seem to miss everyone this time of year. I miss all those people at Heritage Players- Paul, Sue, Charlie, Allan, Robin, Gail, Mike (and if I left any of you out and you're reading this, I miss you too)...

I have a weird obsession with Matchbox 20's song, "Bent". I just downloaded the live on Letterman version from Napster and listening to it, it feels like he's singing directly to me. Hey, everyone needs one teeny-bopper pop band to like. Unfortunately, I think this is the only song of theirs that I really like.

I just started missing Coleen- maybe I'll try to look her up when I'm in Christiansburg. I can't believe I'm going to be there in a few weeks. It'll be here in no time since time always seems to fly when your life is scheduled to the minute.

I was watching "Dream for an Insomniac" last night and realised that Jennifer Aniston can only play one part- herself.

The water buffalo (as Brie likes to call her) is stomping around upstairs. The thought of never having to hear them again in a few weeks still doesn't make me any less irritated at the noise now.

Why am I so obsessed with "Bent"? Usually when I'm this obsessed with a song I wouldn't normally like, it means that at some point in my life that song will be significant. But now if I keep looking for this song to be significant, maybe it wont ever be. Why do I have to make things so complicated sometimes? But I haven't listened to a song 3 times in a row in a LONG TIME! The last one was probably Tull's, "Budapest". I remember leaving early sometimes for my destination (since the town was so small, even the destination that was on the other side of town was only a 15 minute ride) so I could listen to "Budapest" twice on the ride there.

So that was last night.

Tonight Brie invited me to dinner (for real this time) at her new place. Then I think we (Matt, Brie, Jason, and I) are going to see "Little Nicky". I don't really want to see it but that's what they want to see (they've already seen Charlie's Angels and didn't like it like everyone else- but I still want to see it) and I have a free ticket so at least I don't have to spend money for it.

I bought a Dell Inspiron 4000- 600 MHz Pentium III, 5 G Hard Drive, 128 MB RAM, PC Camera (my choice of a free thing), internal CD Writer, mouse, carrying case- $2100. I'm very excited! And it was cheaper than the IBM Think Pad with the same options. Today I'll also purchase a receiver for the stereo and a present for Lisa (still having trouble with Maxine's).

I was writing my Christmas cards today and realised how few people I know. I only have 3 people to send cards to (and 5 people to give cards to in person). Every year there are fewer people. I really would like more people in my life- not an overwhelming amount, but a few. I was thinking about joining a church choir or something after I get settled in New York.

Oh look, in finding a gift for Lisa, I also found one for Maxine. Now, except for 2 people I can't get until after I move, I'm all finished Christmas shopping! I love getting people presents!

Got an email from Daniel- sounds like med school is tough if he's studying 70+ hours only to get B's.

Thoughts about shopping online while in the process of moving:
My addresses are confusing me. My billing address is Arizona, some things are being shipped to Baltimore and some things to New York. Every time I have to enter an address, I have to think about it. For over two years it's been automatic.

I had a dream that took place some time in the near future and I don't remember anything except being in a hotel with Harvey and George. We were talking about something and I asked, "Hey, do we know who our president is yet?" This president thing is getting ridiculous. At least it brings out the comedian in all of us. I know way too many people who, when asked what they want for Christmas, say "a president".

Smart move- Maxine sent me an email today about Amtrak's new rewards program. I've been wondering when they were going to get around to doing this. It looks pretty standard and they even will let you earn airline miles with their program. Sign up today, take a trip within 90 days, and you'll receive 500 bonus miles. I hope that counts for one way tickets since that's what I'll be taking on January 3rd...

I want to know what cleaning product they use in the bathrooms of Park City, UT. Every bathroom I walked in smelled like Drakkar cologne. It drove me nuts.

Today I cancelled my phone, gas & electric, and cable for the 15th. One nice touch was that APS and Cox send customers to each other's companies so we don't have to call two different numbers. I guess since they don't offer any of the same services and they're not in competition with each other, they can do this. Now I just have to hope that the Post Office doesn't screw up my mail.

I think this weekend I will notify everyone of my new address. Besides that and buying furniture (still waiting to hear back about the assembly services), all I have to do is pack.

I'm also, for some reason, feeling comfortable about getting everything done once I get to New York. Tomorrow I have to remember to call that credit union in New York to see if I can join and call the NY DMV (yuck).

I really don't think too highly of this Indigo Girls CD. Actually, except for "Swamp Ophelia", I really only like a handful of Indigo Girls' songs.

I feel so on top of things, I think I'll watch a movie this afternoon. Oh yeah, "Little Nicky" wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I mean, the plot is stupid but there were a few good lines (like about Chris Farley being in heaven) and I loved how they stuck Chubs from "Happy Gilmore" in there- "It's all in the hips!"

I was reading an email from Sylvia this morning and noticed that she has the same habit as Harvey- explaining everything to death so they will be completely understood. I have the same tendencies and am trying to break the habit. It's not worth the effort to explain everything in such detail.

"The Water is Wide" is such a beautiful song and Bob, Pam, and Tom do a fantastic job!!! I wonder if I have time to stop by Bob & Pam's when I'm in Baltimore. And I still want to find the time to ask Tom if he'll give me a personal tour of the Pentagon (of course only a tour of the places us mortals can go). I miss going to Terra Nova concerts! Those were always really good times! Why do I get so nostalgic around the holidays?

More and more people are using Napster. It's easier to find the artists I like now than it was a few months ago.

Why did I have to leave my favourite pair of pants at the Warwick after I looked around the room 3 times since I thought my suitcase looked emptier than it should be? I called them 3 weeks ago, gave them my credit card number, and they said they would mail it. I called this morning and they said they would check into it and get back to me. I hope they will at least write me a check if they lost the pants.

Last night was the first night all season that I did not watch Monday Night Football. And I call myself a Patriots fan...

Lovely, today is grass cutting day at Paradise Lakes. It seems like they try to be extra loud, but I'm sure they aren't. It's SO LOUD THOUGH!!!!! And it's been going on for hours. They do one area, then go do another area, then come back and do the first area, then go away agagin, then come back to the first area again... And of course the first area is right outside my bedroom window. I hope they wear earplugs.

Napster is playing "Bent"!

My new trick is playing solitaire to the rhythm of whatever song is playing. Lit's, "Miserable", is difficult.

I'm not very good at indulging. Whenever I try to indulge, I always have criteria- "you can indulge for 20 minutes", "you can do this, but not that"... I have Paula to thank for that. Today, I'm going to try to indulge like normal people. Don't know what yet, but I'll think of something.

I just got a message on my voice mail from the Warwick about my pants. He left a detailed message saying that he has my pants and that he will send them at the hotel's expense and will I call him at my convenience to verify the address. Well sir, it's not convenient for me to call back right now since I know you have them and I will get them eventually. Right now I'm busy indulging in typing and I will call you when I'm ready.

So I went back to Blockbuster and rented "Center Stage". I'm in that kind of mood even though it might depress me terribly- bringing back old memories (good and bad). Or it might be completely stupid and I'll turn it off after an hour as well.

I stopped at Starbucks after Blockbuster (I love having both of those places in the same shopping centre only a few miles from me). I decided to try the Gingerbread Latte hot since my throat hurts and it's wonderful. I also got some tea since when I went to make myself a cup of tea today, I realised all my mugs were packed. Oops. Hopefully I'll have energy tomorrow to buy a pack of paper cups.

Every once in a while, I feel like I'm a character in a movie. The character of the 20-something year old female who's single but happy. Whenever I get this way, I feel like I'm watching myself live instead of just living. Anyway, I feel that way now. It's a kind of nice feeling- one that I wish I had more often.

So I'll finish replying to email and then I'll go watch my movie. Tomorrow I'll have to get busy. I didn't do anything I was supposed to today (except call the Warwick). Tomorrow I'll get addresses for my Christmas cards, call the NY DMV, call the CUNY credit union, call the Warwick to verify my address, call Verizon, call Earthlink about DSL, and buy paper cups and a travel alarm clock.

Rant of the day: If Chris Wenke wins the Heisman, I'll be very upset. I think Drew Brees deserves it just as much plus he's not 100 years old.

And what's going on with baseball players like Alex Rodriguez? I guess he was lying when he said he cared more about winning than about money? Oh well.

Just got an email from Tim about some show he's doing called "Salome's Last Dance". Maybe I'll go see it. I forgot about Tim.

About taking naps- I have a terrible concept of time anyway, and when I take a nap, I REALLY have no clue what time it is when I wake up. I guess since I hardly ever take them, no matter how long it is when I finally do, I feel like I'm waking up in the morning after a night of sleep. It's 9:30 at night right now and I feel like it's 9:30 in the morning. I'm ready to start my day and right now it's still the day before. So I think I'll just go watch my movie and hopefully fall asleep again and then when I wake up, it will be the next day (unless I do something stupid and wake up at midnight or something). I think I'll make it through to a decent morning hour.

One more time related thing- The transition from 3 hours difference from the East Coast to two hours went flawlessly. I haven't had any time zone problems since we started doing the two hour thing (even with the TV schedules).

I just read a journal entry from September 18th that I don't even remember writing. Well, actually I remember writing a little bit of it.

Next time I have to remember to get the Gingerbread Latte with skim milk. I couldn't finish it with whole (or whatever they use).

It's been nice not having a roommate these past few days. I can't wait till New York. Although, being in an apartment alone all the time in New York might be a little lonely. I hope I meet some interesting people somewhere.

Right now I'm feeling sick enough to fall asleep right now...

I think virtually every apartment in my court has at least one dog. Please don't let there be any yappy dogs within hearing distance of my new apartment.

Why haven't I ever seen a Honda S2000 on the road?

Mike Mardesich- he's #33, is that his age as well? AND, looking at the Maryland roster, I see he's a juinior. Huh?

I still feel kind of sluggish, but my throat doesn't hurt anymore. Still a little congested though.

"Center Stage" wasn't bad although completely unrealistic with the ending. It was a good formula movie which depicts the life of a dancer very well. Only two parts depressed me- when she was taking the jazz class just for fun and when she got the lead role in the workshop piece. The finished piece didn't impress me though.

Furniture stuff: The bed people called me to say that the frame wasn't ready yet but they could deliver the mattress & boxspring. I told them to just wait till the frame came in and deliver everything at once. I found a web site that matches customers with assembly services so now I just have to order the furniture and then contact the assembly service after to let them know what I have.

I've been feeling calm and relaxed now for the past two days. It's kind of fun being mellow.

I love Video ETA- it's nice to know when a movie you've been wanting to see will be on video. I wish I could take the month of February off and watch all the new releases...

Two movies that I really like have main characters who are young females with insomnia- "Dream for an Insomniac" and "Thing Called Love". These aren't two movies that I normally would like so I'm wondering if the insomnia factor is what did it. The only thing is that both of these characters had insomnia because of their parents, and I don't have a reason for my insomnia.

Right now I'm furniture shopping. I'm enjoying furnishing my apartment. Although, I've never had both of my credit cards to the limit before. I feel like a real American. Bank of America doesn't make it easy to check your account balance like Citibank does. In fact, they make it pretty darned obnoxious!! Okay, I went through all these damned steps and now it tells me that I have to enter my ATM number. I want to check my credit card balance, I don't even have a BoA bank account. I guess I was looking in the wrong place. Okay, now it looks like the only accounts you can check online are banking accounts, not credit cards. I hate BoA!!!!!

Fish creep me out! I hate looking at them. I wonder if Matt will move his fish before I move out. I hope so. I guess I could call him and ask, but it's not worth it. I don't mind that much. I just hate looking at them. Watching that South Park with the evil fish didn't help any. Speaking of South Park, I haven't liked the two new ones I've seen for this season. I figured it would have to go a little downhill at some point. I mean, you can only do so much. Fortunately, there are still those brief moments of genius that makes it worth watching.

I'm still feeling at peace with things today. Perhaps it's the "sort of cold"? It's certainly can't be a new me. You can't change overnight. Who cares? I'll just enjoy it while it lasts. I was just trying to picture living out of a box in several different places for 3 weeks so I could see if I'm forgetting something I'll need. This is the first time I've pictured this and don't feel anxious about it. I think everything will be fine. Sure, it'll be a busy time, but I've done busier before and more uncomfortable before. At least all the places I have to stay are comfortable and safe (sorry Eytan). I'll ship a box of clothes and stuff to the office in Towson since I'll be there the most and live out of that while I'm in Maryland. Then when I go down to Virginia, I'll take the box with me. I love car travel when you can just throw everything in the back seat instead of worrying what you can carry through airports. Then I'll ship the box up to New York a few days before I leave Virginia and live out of the suitcase for those few days. Then I'll take the train up to New York with my suitcase, go to my new apartment, and hope I can get the assembly service to come that first day (or the next day). While the furniture is being set up, I can get everything for work set up. Then when the furniture is set up, I can unpack. Then when everything in the apartment is set up, I can go get a driver's license and bank account. Then I'll take placement tests, register for classes, do the auction, and then start classes! See, no sweat. I love feeling happy and relaxed!!! :-)

I went to Walgreens today and got a travel alarm clock and litle travel shampoo and stuff. I feel so ready to move!!! Of course, I still need to pack everything...

Someone asked me this morning, " Which of the following is most important to you?":
A. Education
B. Friends & Family
C. Career
D. Self-Esteem
E. Social Status
I said D. Self-Esteem, of course. If you have self-esteem, you can get all the rest of the choices.

I really wish I could have seen "Jesus Christ Superstar" on Broadway this year before it closed. I downloaded a few songs from that production and Judas sounds AMAZING!!! Maybe I'll find someone who taped it and wants to loan or copy the video for me. I wish I still knew people like that.

I really love "The Murmurs"! I own one EP, downloaded several songs from Napster and still really don't know much about them. How many albums do they have? Are they still around? Do they tour in the US? I think I'll go research that right now.

Okay, they have 2 albums- one in print, one out of print. They're from LA and currently are only playing in LA. Supposedly they were going to have a new album out this summer but I guess that didn't happen. I decided to sign up for their mailing list since that's easier than checking the web site every few weeks. I wish all bands had this feature on their web site.

Uh-oh, I just had a thought that I never understood when other Tull fans said it- "I wish someone else was the lead singer instead of Ian Anderson. I mean, these are great songs, but his voice is really weak. I'd love to hear someone else try them with the same musicians. Ian should play too, just not sing. Yeah, like that would ever work.

Okay, I found another song that's IMPOSSIBLE to play solitaire to- Electric Blues from "Hair"!

I should have rented more movies from Blockbuster when I was out. Maybe there will be a good movie on TV. Although, I'm so in the mood to watch a movie, maybe I'll watch one of the ones I own. Oh yeah, last night I watched, "But I'm a Cheerleader" which I didn't think I would like but parts were really laugh-out-loud funny!!! Although, most people probably wouldn't find it laugh-out-loud funny.

Maybe I'll go back out- mail my Christmas cards, rent a movie, and get some dinner. I haven't really eaten much the past few days (I'm not hungry) and I should eat something. But now that I wrote this, I probably won't go out. I have a habit of writing that I'll do something that day, and I don't do it for a few days.

I don't like that when I search for "Broadway" on Napster there are too many Goo Goo Dolls, "Broadway", titles that come up. I wish you could do a +/- search or other advanced searches.

I've been in my need-to-listen-to-meaningful-songs-only mood recently.

I just got my pants. Usually when I'm expecting a package, I wear something in which I can answer the door. I forgot about The Warwick Federal Expressing my pants and I was walking around in a bra and shorts. I quickly had to throw on a shirt and make sure he didn't leave (I hate having to go to the office to pick up packages).

Why do I always watch so many movies in December? Is it because this is the time when I'm alone the most? It does always seem to work out that way. The end of this December I won't be alone too much. Last December I was alone all the time. It'll be different this December because I won't be staying in a hotel where it's easy to watch movies all night. But I'm still watching a ton of movies now. And why is this important?

Today feels like Friday. I suppose tomorrow might feel like Saturday.

I've narrowed down movies to watch tonight to three selections: "Pecker", "Much Ado About Nothing", and/or "Being John Malkovich. Now that's not all over the place.

If anyone knows where I can find the music from "Thing Called Love" (not the soundtrack, but the actual music that's in the movie) or anything by Maria Ford, please email me.

I'm getting in my Celtic/Spiritual/Wiccan/Winter-Solstice mood. I hope I'm still in this mood when I try to go to Ellicott City later this month. And I hope Main Street hasn't changed too much. I wonder if I'll run into anyone I know. Usually when I'm there, I run into either Rich & Dan or Kris's Step-Sister, Liza (I think that's her name). She always recognises me for some reason. I met her one time, briefly, at a cast party. Four years later, I'm walking around Ellicott City and she recognises me from across the street. Then I came back a few years later and she recognises me again. I wish I had that kind of visual memory. Anyway, I'm looking forward to visiting my stores and stuff.

I don't have enough Christmas music. If anyone knows of any traditional Christmas music please let me know. No Bing Crosby, no Backstreet Boys- just good traditional music. In the meantime, I'll look on Napster.

I just made a little collection of "Solstice" music from my MP3's. It's perfect (minus a few good Christmas songs which I'm working on as I type this).

I'm not having any luck though. I haven't found any songs that I want to download. Here's where an advanced search would come in handy. I suppose I could try to search MP3s on the web...

Okay, am I the only one who likes Christmas music that's NOT sung by pop and country artists? I know I'm not looking very hard but I didn't think it would have been this difficult.

Bingo! You have to type in Christmas for "Artist" and traditional for "Title". Now I've found plenty!

Okay, now I've gotten TOO into the Christmas spirit. I just had a strong desire to see the Nutcracker. I could always watch the version I was in on video in the privacy of my own home in case something drastic happens, no one will be around.

Bingo again! Napster and my persistance came through! I found "Thing Called Love" music by typing in "Thing Called Love Soundtrack" since "Thing Called Love" wasn't working. It only turned up 3 songs, but now I know what to try again later.

Today I realised just how soon I'm moving. AAAHHH!!! Time to start panicing. I know I have enough time to do everything, it's just that I HATE packing and don't want to. And it just hit me that I won't be living in Phoenix anymore. And it feels weird.

When people read email or a letter from someone they know, do they hear their voice while reading it?

I still have a cold today. I guess this is the normal time of year for me to get sick. I don't mind it, actually. It means I'll be better before Christmas.

All I have to do before I move is:
- close my bank account
- pack
- clean the apartment
- notify everyone of my new address
And that's it! I'm going to pack a little bit on Sunday and then Brie and I are going to Ernie's for karaoke (I hope my cold is gone by then). Then I have Monday and Tuesday to finish packing and the Wednesday the Salvation Army comes to pick up whatever's left. I wonder when Matt & Brie will move the TV and entertainment centre? It's been nice to still have it this past week.

Just got an email from Andi. See, I'm not the only one who gets nostalgic this time of year. Maybe I'll have time to see her later this month (although I'm running out of days) since she's still in DC for a little while longer. From the little bit she wrote, it doesn't seem like much has changed. I hope to find out more if we find time to catch up. And I want to know what Nikki's doing in San Francisco.

Ugh, the most hideous alarm was just going off outside my window. Thank God the owner was around to turn it off (or the criminals figured out how to turn it off quickly). It sounded like a dog whistle would sound if we could hear it.

My December journal file is large than one of my Dave Matthews jpgs.

I can't stop listening to "Bent".

For some reason, Spalding Gray's story about when he went to a "writing camp" just popped in my mind.
"You walk, you write, you eat, and you walk, you reread what you wrote, and you write and write, and have a drink, go to bed, and wake up, and you walk, and you write, and you walk, and you reread what you wrote, and you eat, and you write and you write, and you have a drink, go to bed, and you wake up, and you walk, and you write, and you write..."
Or something like that. I can picture having the same experience myself.

I barely slept last night. I slept from 1-3, then from 3:30-5:30, then from 6:30-8:30 and then I just rested until 9:30. I'm in the coughing stage of my cold and it's driving me CRAZY! I hope this one doesn't linger like it usually does.

Today I plan on throwing out anything that's not being sold, being packed, or given to charity (including everything in the fridge). I hope the dumpsters aren't full yet. I should probably do that soon just in case they fill up. But first I will go check to make sure there's some room in one of them.

I also plan on doing laundry for the clothes that I'm packing in the suitcase and the box for Baltimore (why bother washing the clothes that will be sitting in a box for a month?).

That's it for today. I'm still resting. Oh, I also should save my files that I need to a Zip disk since I'm not having any luck with the X-Drive.

I have all computer things under control. The laptop hopefully will arrive in Baltimore some time before January 3rd (it should happen). All the files that I need are saved so that's all taken care of. I just need to get all the files and programs off of this computer so the person who has it next doesn't have anything extra on it (plus I don't want them to see some of this stuff). And I'll do that Wednesday morning before they come to get it.

I have a hell of a lot to pack but not today, not today. Today is one last rest day. I have to find a hotel to stay at on Wednesday and Thursday. Maybe I'll do that today.

Okay, I reserved a room at the Hilton in Scottsdale. That way I'll be close to Rent-A-Wreck for when I return the car on Friday before I go to the airport.

I decided not to close my bank account so I can pay bills until I set up an account in New York. I just hope they'll let me close the account over the phone.

I feel so on top of things!!! Except the packing, but I'm assuming it won't be a big deal. All you have to do is throw everything in boxes and make sure nothing will break. How long can that possibly take? I know, a lot longer than I would like it to take. I still want to know where all the STUFF comes from...

I guess I'll have to try to find boxes tomorrow if Brie doesn't have enough (which I'm sure she won't).

I'll be so happy once I'm on that plane from Charlotte to Baltimore (that is if it decided to leave on time and I'm there on time to make it)...

For the first time ever, Robitussin is actually working! It never surpresses my cough this much!!!

I got two Christmas cards so far this year (that's probably all I'll get since I won't be here to get anymore and the Post Office probably won't figure out how to forward them)- from Jay & Sherry and Neil & Maxine. Thanks guys! You'll get your cards when I give you your presents. I figured, why mail another card? Well, I guess so you can decorate your home with cards. Oops. I only mailed cards to people I wouldn't see. Guess you all will have to wait till the 23rd.

I'm REALLY in the Christmas spirit this year. And this year there will actually be plenty of people around to share it with! Family, Baltimore people, and Blacksburg people! And I hope I get to see Jeff while he's in Baltimore. That'll be fun! I emailed Jon about all of us getting together on the 21st. Hopefully that will work. It's nice being on speaking terms with Jon again. It makes it easier when arranging plans. None if this, "You can be at Jeff's until 5:00, but at 5:00 I'm coming over so you'll have to leave," business.

I also should store all the phone numbers I'll need for the next month in my cell phone and all my email addresses in a file that I can store on my X Drive. This stupid X Drive has to be good for something.

Heisman winner- Weinke- yuck. It was close though, poor Heupel. In a suit, Weinke really looks like someone from 1955 and sort of reminds me of Brian. And I thought he was 26. No, he's 28!! I still think it should have been Miami instead of Florida State at the Orange Bowl. Still, it'll be fun to watch Florida State and Oklahoma, sort of. I have a feeling, since the game's in Florida, Oklahoma doesn't have a chance. But I'm routing for Oklahoma. Go Heupel!

This morning I went to Jitters- a coffee shop that just opened right up the street from me. Figures, good things always open near me right before I leave (and things close right after I move near it). Anyway, there was a couple walking in when I was walking out and the woman said to the man, "I knew you were partial to redheads." Then she looked at me and told him, "Of course I'm talking about the dog over there." There was a red dog outside. Thought that was funny.

Why does this guy's car alarm go off about 5 times a day? I guess he has the sensitive kind that goes off if someone walks by it.

Matt and Brie just came in. He should never want to come here since this time and the last time he walked in to find a dead fish. Of course, he's taking it today so the other two can die is their apartment where they belong. I'm so glad I won't have these fish to look at anymore. Wow, no fish, no TV, what will I look at when my eyes are too tired to look at anything else?

If Bill Clinton is Mayor of New York, I'm moving to Scotland. I was reading a local paper this morning and they asked readers the question, "What will New York City be like if Bill Clinton was the Mayor?" Or something like that. I'm wondering why the people of Phoenix care. Anyway, I have to remember to get the paper next week to see what the readers said. In fact, I was thinking of responding. I should do that later today.

Matt seems to like my little drum instrument thingy (Thanks Paula and Eytan for making me actually write the word, "thingy".) Everyone seems to like it more than I do. If it wasn't a gift from Paula & Harvey, I'd give it to him.

I just missed getting to watch Matt clean out the fish tank and put the fish in a water jug. In the process of doing it, he dropped one of the fish on the floor. I did get to watch him play with the fish turds though. That was lovely.

I think it'll be a lot easier to pack once all their stuff is out of here. I didn't realise how much stuff they had left. See, everyone has more stuff than they think. It makes me a little nervous what stuff of mine I will find that I forgot about or just wasn't thinking about.

Oh boy- I just helped them move the entertainment centre out. Ouch- my wrists hurt from carrying it the wrong way.

The Rep online doesn't have the Clinton for Mayor question so I can't submit a response unless I go back out to find another copy of the paper and get the email address of where to send the responses. Not worth it.

There seems to be a lot of shows on Broadway recently starting with the letter "J" (which is usually so uncommon)- "Jeckyl and Hyde", "James Joyce's The Dead", "Jane Ayre"...

Well, The Redskins can't blame Turner for their loss to Dallas today. Not such an interesting day in football except for The Rams beating The Vikings which actually wasn't all that exciting since The Vikings already will be in the playoffs. I'm kind of interested in watching some of tonight's Oakland/Jets game so I guess I'll go to a bar or something since I no longer have a TV. If The Jets win tonight they'll be tied with Miami in the AFC East. I can't believe there's only 2 weeks left in the regular season. Time Flies!

Wow- 3 clean-cut guys having a rational and civilised conversation about football after each consuming a few beer. The one on the end is quite cute AND he's a Patriots fan!

I've been in the mood to do the things and feel the things I did and felt when I was 18. I can't imagine partying now like I did then though.

Oh boy, couple sitting next to me having a heated arguement. Girl is trying to explain that she's not trying to be difficult. Face it cutie, you are a high-maintnance woman.

Jets aren't doing well tonight.

Lawyers have to speak Spanish now. I just saw a commercial that said, "Si habla espanol."

Geez, give the woman a few drinks and she gets obnoxious and demanding.

WOW! They're playing Tull's, "Skating Away". I've only heard this song on the radio once and I've never heard it in a restaurant. Cool beans!

Uh-oh, Oakland's gonna score again. They are amazing this year. I wish we could see them in the Super Bowl. Maybe next year.

28-0, what's going on with the Jets? They're not this bad. I can't even watch Sportscentre tonight. But I can check ESPN's website later. I want to know what happened in the 1st half of the game.

Dramatic businesswoman to the right of me talking to the guy about all the problems with her job and how she's trying to get her energy level up. I think she's trying to get a small business off the ground. I hope no one told her starting a business would be easy. She's talking like someone did.

Now they're playing The Beatles', "Baby You're a Rich Man". What odd songs on this Classic Rock satellite station.

Jets ain't goin' nowhere!

Oh this woman doesn't know when to quit. Stop nagging and bitching and "explaining". It's getting old. Although I'm not taking the guy's side. I mean, he's drinking a Coors Light with a LIME.

The bartender and the guy with the complaining businesswoman are bantering with bad, fake Brooklyn accents. Please, give it a rest.

Geez, do I like anybody? Not here, not in Phoenix.

The bitching woman's voice reminds me of Nikki Franchini's.

Why did a computer screen with The Matrix code on it just flash after showing the replay? That was freaky. Even though it won't be any good, especially if Jada Pinkett-Smith is in it, I'm looking forward to "The Matrix 2" and annoyed that it's not coming out till 2002.

Cute guy just left :-(

I think I'll head out too and just catch the game highlights on ESPN's web site.

I love the way bartenders wash glasses- scrub two glasses for 2 seconds in the soapy water, dip in the hot water, dip in cold water, set aside to dry. I'm glad I'm using a straw. He should at least clean the rims. I don't care too much though- I'm sure they're clean enough. I'd be a little more upset if I saw that being done with the silverware- which I know it is- I've worked in restaurants.

It looks like a couple of Utah boys are sitting at the bar now. But they're drinking...

Oh, but remember the Miami/Jets game- with Testaverde in the 4th quarter scoring 30 points to tie the game and then won it in overtime. That won't happen again. Oh that CAN'T happen again- I just saw that there's only 6 minutes left in the 4th- that was fast. I still think Testaverde will do something in the 4th quarter.

Do I write too much about sports? It's not really THAT important in my life. Not like some people.

So now I'm sitting here at the computer for lack of anything better to do. I don't want to pack anything else tonight, I can't watch TV, don't want to read anything...

I should go to bed somewhat early tonight and get up early tomorrow and really start packing!

I barely slept last night. I have no idea when I fell asleep since the only clock is in the kitchen. When I did sleep, I had weird dreams about my teeth falling out and having to go to a dentist in New York and then Paula was at Sylvia's apartment and I overheard her yelling at Josh for spending her money on a pair of shoes. What the hell did I smoke before bed? Yesterday I called Paula to see if she could give me wake up calls for the next few days since I don't have an alarm clock. Oh wait, I just bought that travel alarm clock. I'll have to use that tonight. Well, anyway, because I was scared I wouldn't hear the phone this morning, I was up most of the morning waiting. Finally the phone rang and I got up. But I'm not very rested. I'll definitely have to set up the travel alarm clock tonight.

I did my work for the day and now I'm procrastinating before I start packing. My back doesn't hurt this morning- that's a good thing. But I still hate packing and really don't feel like it. But I have no choice. So I'll start at noon- that's fair.

I can't believe how much Alex rodriguez got from Texas. Atheletes' salaries are getting crazy. Well, they're already crazy, now they're outrageous! I still want to know how much profit an owner has at the end of a season.

I have Free to Be You and Me's "It's Alright to Cry" in my head. Why? Hey, when Rebecca passes on her turntable to me, I can listen to Free to Be again! I hope I can find the record. It should be at Paula & Harvey's.

Maybe I'll go out tonight and watch the end of MNF and then stop by a store to see if they have any boxes that early (probably not, since the game is over so early here). I just don't feel like getting up at 4:00 tomorrow. There are 4 grocery stores right nearby. Surely one of them will have some boxes already at 10:00.

I'm getting nervous that everything won't be packed in time. I'm sure it'll all get done but right now it doesn't feel that way. Looking around the apartment makes me feel so overwhelmed. God, I hate moving. I really hope my life circumstances allow me to stay in New York for a while.

I wish I had someone to help me with the little things (finding packing supplies like cardboard, boxes and bubble wrap, packing posters (I hate that), and taking out the trash. Well, there isn't anyone so I shouldn't even think about it.

So today I'll get rid of everything that's trash, organise email and phone numbers, and get boxes. Tomorrow I'll finish packing and call UPS. Wednesday I'll clean up my computer and wait for the Salvation Army, Cox, and UPS to come, check into the hotel, and go karaoke with Brie. Thursday I'll clean the apartment and relax. Friday I'll return the car and get on the plane. I really hope I can pack everything on Tuesday. It took me 2 hours to pack 3 boxes today (I can't believe it really took that long. I must have been moving REALLY slowly). The thing that takes the longest is taping them. I'm terrible at that. I actually just realised that I have a few small boxes that I can use to pack a little more today so then I'll feel a little better.

Okay, that's enough break. Back to work...

So now I'm going to Amaccapane's (the bar down the street) to watch the end of the game and then see if any grocery stores have any boxes. If not, I'm not waking up early, I'll just go by some tomorrow- they can't be that expensive. I'll have iced tea at the bar so I should be good for another hour or so of packing when I get home. I want to go through the 3 boxes that have been sitting in storage since I got here and see what I want to get rid of. Most of it I want to keep (like playbills, ticket stubs, etc.) but some of it I'm sure I can part with. Then I'll add some stuff to the stuff and tape up those boxes and they'll be ready to go. I'll also set aside everything going to Baltimore so it doesn't get lost in the shuffle. Why do I feel the need to write a play-by-play of the moving process? I have no idea but it makes me feel better.

Only two more nights of listening to buffalo upstairs!

I was mistaken- I just saw that Oakland still has a chance to make the playoffs. I'm sure they'll beat Seattle next week.

Before I left for the bar, I downloaded Laura Branigan's "Gloria" to see if I wanted to do it when Brie and I go karaoke on Wednesday. Then when I got in the car to go to the bar, it was on the radio. I haven't heard it on the radio since it came out in the 80's. Weird.

I got to the bar right at the exciting part of the game. In other words when The Colts came on strong and killed the Bills chance for the playoffs. I hate Tthe Colts. But I do like Peyton Manning.

Went to the store and they didn't have any boxes. If I wake up semi-early tomorrow I'll go check a few stores. If not, I'll just buy some whenever I wake up.

Got home and started looking through those boxes. Okay, I'm freaked out and overwhelmed with memories! Memories of who I was from 1994-1997. Playbills of shows I was in and shows I went to see. Ticket stubs from theatre ("The Misenthrope", "The Show Off", and many others I forgot about) and concerts (REM, Jethro Tull at various venues including the infamous show in Richmond...). Pictures of Heritage Players people and Michelle Bar-av's New Years party in '94. Pictures and things I used to have up on my walls in various apartments. Christmas, birthday, Valentines Day cards from Brian Patrick, Brian Perlberg, Phil, Steve Cox, Jeff, Jay, Les & Carol... A lot of those people wrote such emotional stuff (especially Jeff and Jay). I forgot how much some of those people cared for me. Letters from Brian Patrick (scary). Postcards from Rebecca and Eytan. Heather's description for the person I was to be at her "Hair" cast party (that I didn't go to because Hallie and Jonathan didn't go and I didn't like anyone else). She really made me an incredible being- gorgeous, seductive, evil, capable of overpowering everyone else at the party and the ability to learn all their secrets... A poem I wrote in New York in '97 right before I went to dinner with Chris Rupp, a poem I wrote at Eric Parr's house in Rhode Island in '96, a poem I wrote before an audition in Blacksburg in '96... A song I wrote in '95 that I actually was trying to remember the other day (another strange coincidense). And so much more!!! This box is incredible. And I haven't even finished going through it yet. I needed a break from all the emotion. Some of the things I picked up made me shiver and shudder and put it down immediately. So I thought I'd get all the emails and phone numbers I'll need and save that and then go back to the box. After I finish going through that one box, I'll have 10 boxes packed. And I'm still nowhere near done. Tomorrow will be a busy day. I hope I can wake up when the alarm goes off. I think it will be fine.

I went to three grocery stores this morning around 9:00 and none of them had boxes. So I bought some.

Then I went to Jitters and had a bagel- gotta have food energy to pack. While I was there I was reading the "Get Out" (local paper) and there was an article on restaurants that are open late. They say that the Valley isn't New York but a few places are open late now. Some serve until 11:00 during the week and midnight on the weekends! Wow! Oh boy, midnight, huh? And all but one of those places were bars. Gee thanks. I can get bar food until midnight. I'm so glad I'm moving.

I just realised that I'm going to need labels for my boxes. Oops. Now I have to go back out. I think I'll do the majority of packing first though in case I forgot about anything else- then I can get that when I get the labels. I have until midnight to finish packing since I have to call UPS by midnight to schedule a pickup.

I like my little alarm clock. It has a snooze button. I haven't used a snooze button in a long time. Fortunately, I didn't abuse it this morning- I only hit it 3 times (and it goes off every 5 minutes, I think).

Well, one person at UPS told me that I can call in for a pickup until midnight EST. Then I called to ask them something else and the woman told me I had until 8:00 EST to call to schedule a pickup. So I decided to call one more time to see if I would get one of the same answers and of course I got different information. This person told me I had until midnight in whatever time zone that I'm in. Well, I like the last one the best but I think I'll go with midnight EST just to be safe. I just really hope that the 2nd person wasn't right.

Weights of boxes- I forgot that I'd have to way these suckers. I can't even lift some of them. Maxine suggested that I just tip the corner of each box and slide the scale under it. So now I have to go out and get a scale. This is SO FRUSTRATING!!!!! I HATE moving!!!!!

Although, I have 14 boxes packed, I have still have more stuff (records, tapes, clothes, posters...). I think I'll wind up with around 20-22 boxes. And I have until 10:00 (at least it's not a 3 hour difference here anymore) to finish.

After I finish packing and after I take a much needed break, I will clean up the computer just in case the Salvation Army decides to show up at 8:00 AM. I'll just wake up when they knock on the door if I'm not up before then. No sense getting up earlier than I have to.

I have this fear that the Salvation Army will come at 8:00 and UPS won't come until 6:00. What am I supposed to do all day in an empty apartment waiting for UPS to show up? Sure, I can go get a magazine or book (since I packed all mine) and read for a little while. But for 8 hours? God, I hope that doesn't happen. But with my luck, it will. If anyone has any brilliant ideas of how to pass the time, please let me know before 1:00 AM Mountain Time since I won't be able to check my email after that since I'm taking it off of the computer.

And now I must go buy a scale (and get labels too). Do I need anything else while I'm out? Probably, but I won't think of it until I get back...

So now I'm taking a break and then I'll get all important phone numbers and emails (which I still haven't done). Then I'll clean up my computer and possibly do one more moving related thing before bed.

Oh, when I went to Target to get a scale, I forgot to get shipping labels. So I had to go back out later which was fine since I was hungry anyway and needed to go get something to eat since I obviously don't have anything here. I went to K-Mart and asked if they had any boxes since I thought I might run out. They did. They had a box but they were out of shipping labels. So I just bought a box of floppy disk labels and hope they're big enough for the boxes. They're probably not but what difference does it make? UPS puts their own shipping labels on it too, don't they? Well, even if they don't, I'll still have labels (they just won't be very big).

Now that I'm sitting here, I don't feel very comfortable. I feel like I have too much to do. I shouldn't save it all for tomorrow morning. Oh yeah, and UPS has until 7:00 PM to come get my stuff. I really hope I'm not last on the driver's list. And now that I still have stuff to pack and send later, I'm annoyed that I packed my blanket. I could have had a blanket tonight. I'm REALLY not good at falling asleep uncovered.

Oh goodbye buffalo. I hear you stomping around up there (please don't turn on your music). I won't miss you!

I can't believe this is my last night in my apartment. I still looks lived in so I don't believe it really. It really shouldn't look this lived in. That's how much stuff I left for tomorrow...

No sense sitting here thinking about all the stuff you could/should be doing. Either go do it or relax. Think I'll relax. I've gotten this far, I can procrastinate a little more with no harm done (I hope).

So, what else needs to be done tonight? Perhaps if I sit here and think as I type I'll come up with something. And while I'm doing this I'm forwarding myself important emails (to my other email address) that I got after I saved everything.

Okay, all computer related stuff is done (except cleaning up and unplugging). I just got really tired though. I hope I can muster up a tiny bit of energy to go out and get those things. But maybe I can wake up really early...

Actually, that really sounds preferable right now. Of course it does, anything sounds better than going out right now. But I really mean it this time. Famous last words.

Well, I'll try it but I have a bad feeling about this...

I did it! I got up at 6:00 AM- got food, drink, and a box (since I was at the food store early enough to find one). Then I disconnected my computer, got everything off and out of the furniture for the Salvation Army, called the Salvation Army to see what time they're planning on getting here (between 2:30-5:00), and started moving a little slower since they won't be here for a while. Now if only UPS and Cox could show up around the same time. I think I scheduled Cox between 8-1. In fact, there's a Cox cable truck outside right now. I wonder if it's here for me.

I'm feeling much better now- although I think I pulled something in my back and stretched some ligaments in my knee.

Why do they mow the lawn here every day in the winter? Who cares, this is the last time I'll hear them (unless they're mowing tomorrow when I come back to finish up. And no more listening to buffalo woman and their parties upstairs! I'm outta here!

The only things I'm worried about now are the weights of the boxes. I don't know if I wrote this already but it's impossible to weigh boxes on a bathroom scale. I lifted the corner of the box, slid the scale underneath, it was barely on the scale and I couldn't read the numbers. So I sort of held it on the scale, subtracted 5 pounds for me adding weight on the box and then added 3-8 pounds since it's better to be over than under. I sure hope they don't weigh each of them. Then I can worry about everything getting to its destination. And the mail getting there too. And I think that's it.

The morning is flying by, but I have a feeling the afternoon will drag. That's the way it usualy works.

The card with the Hunter Testing Centre number is packed in the Baltimore box. I did have a little brochure handy though with a list of all the department phone numbers. I decided to call one to see if they could give me the number of the testing centre. I chose the Religion department since I thought they would be the nicest and the most helpful. The guy was nice but didn't know the number. He gave me the main number and now I'm on hold. I've been on hold with the Welcome Centre several times for at least 20 minutes each time and never wound up speaking to anyone. In fact, I'm about to give up this time too. Oops, wrote too soon. Got a person.

Now I'm calling Hunter again to see if they know about the credit union. Then I'll ask for the number of the testing centre.

I have no idea when I'll type all thsi and upload my journal.

I wonder what time UPS will get here. My guess is 4:30. I think I've seen them here a few times around then.

Guess I'll have to check into the hotel late tonight after karaoke. I really hope Laura Branigan's "Gloria" is on their songlist. That one's been in my head for the past two days and I think I could do a pretty good job. And it beats all the mellow songs I usually do.

Sitting here on the dining room floor, I just remembered sitting here the day I moved in and was waiting for the furniture. That seems like I really long time ago.

And with my spirits now lifted, I conclude my entry for today!

Sitting at Pizza Hut having some breadsticks. Then I'll go check my email before bed. Brie offered to let me stay at her apartment. I didn't last night (since I would have been charged for the hotel room because I didn't cancel within the time frame), but I'll stay there tonight.

Last night I stayed at one of the Hiltons in Scottsdale which was under construction. All the parking spots were either taken or roped off so I had to park in a dark conrner far away. They advertised On Command movies which I was looking forward to, but it turned out that they don't have it installed yet. So no movies. I actually will be more comfortable at Matt & Brie's and it's a hell of a lot cheaper.

Karaoke was awesome! I did "Gloria" which went well and then I did "White Rabbit" which I didn't think was too great but that's not what everyone else thought. First a young guy came up to me and said how incredible I was and that my "White Rabbit" was the best he's ever heard. Then an older man came up to me and asked for my autograph. Then the KJ (karaoke Jockey?) said, "You win the prize for the night," and gave me a flower. What a great way to end life in Phoenix.

Finished cleaning out the apartment today and packed the last box (have to go ship it tomorrow morning). Then I dyed my hair which came out a little too dark for my taste. If I wasn't moving to the dreary East Coast, the sun would lighten it a little. Oh well.

Usually before I move to a new city, there's a bunch of stuff I want to do in the current city before I leave. Here, I couldn't think of anything. I couldn't even think of somewhere unique to have dinner tonight. I'll miss Brie though. At there's someone I'll miss.

Got up this morning (whoops, yesterday morning), shipped the last box, returned the car, and flew to Baltimore and actually got in basically on time after a near miss in Charlotte (fortunately the flight from Charlotte to baltimore left late).

Now I'm at George's. Davitt is also staying here. Davitt, Linda, and I (George went to bed early) watched "The Talented Mr. Ripley". That really isn't a bad movie and it was even better the second time. Linda said they're making a sequel. Should be interesting to see what they'll do with that.

Now it's 2:45 and I'm not tired at all for some reason. I guess I could watch another movie and hope it's boring enough to make me fall asleep. But I have to get up at 7:00. If I fall asleep by 4:00, that'll be 3 hours of sleep which should be enough. I feel my not-needed-too-much-sleep phase coming back. I was wondering when it would. This is a great time for that with all the activities I have from now until basically the end of January...

Yesterday was a day that was partially really productive but mostly dull. Last night though was terrific! I went to dinner at Manor Tavern (I finally got to go there after all these years) with George & Davitt. I've talked to Davitt a little bit before but never for that long. What a fascinating and intelligent man. I hope one day to read his book. It was also really nice to get the conversation off of George for a while. AND he watches college basketball! And he looks like Dennis Miller.

After dinner, we watched "Gladiator"- cool fight scenes, mostly historically inaccurate.

I slept last night though- 4 whole hours! Beats the 30 minutes I had the night before.

Long day today but not too bad.

Oh, if things don't work out staying with Matt & Sylvia, George said I was welcome to come back here. That's really nice of him- especially being the week before Christmas. But he's not working for the next two weeks, so I guess he feels more relaxed.

I got my Dell Notebook! Haven't looked at it too much but I did turn it on and it's NICE! The thing I like best so far is the screen. You can actually see from a number of different angles unlike most where you have to sit on top of it. And it's not the largest screen but it seems a lot bigger than I thought it would. I'm just a little nervous about the Windows ME edition (heard some bad things about it- like it crashes a lot- and wish I had told them to install the 2000 edition instead. Maybe I'll get lucky with it.

And now... off to work! Oh, it was also nice to have George drive last night since I wasn't looking forward to driving in the fog (my night vision is bad enough). I haven't seen fog like that in a long time.

And one more thing before I leave- last night, a basketball game was on during dinner. From where we were sitting, we could see a little bit. When Davitt asked what the scrore was, I was the only one who could read it. It was kind of fun being the one in the group with the best eyesight. I don't think that's ever happened before.

And now off to work!

The weather is still bizarre- mild, humid, raining with thunder. This time last year (or actually a week before) it was also 60�. The weather is getting more and more strange every year. At least it's not colder right now or there would be a serious snow storm or freezing rain. And oh what fun that would be.

I don't really have anything else to say, but I don't know what else to do besides sit here until George & Davitt are ready.

Let's see, can I think of anything interesting? No.

Well, I really like George's music collection but I already knoew that. Okay, so that wasn't interesting.

There are so many interesting topics though, that I wish I knew more about... History of the Roman Empire, the Saints, physics...

Ah, I think Davitt's ready. Can we leave yet? No- he gets to have something to drink first and discuss the picture of Bush, "The Accidental President", on the cover of The Economist magazine.

Okay, now we're leaving.

I was going to stay late at the office and wrap Christmas presents, but at 5:00, Neil called to see if I wanted to meet him & Maxine for dinner in Pikesville. So Eytan mentioned Chicken Out which is like Boston Market. I decided to invite Eytan along. Then he asked if I wanted to go to his parents after dinner. So we met Neil & Maxine at Chicken Out (when I hear that name, I picture a numch of chickens dancing around with Rainbow Flags to The Pansies or somebody) which was fun. Then Eytan and I went to his parents and had a nice evening of his father reading some of his poetry and sharing his views on psychology, science, poetry, and criticism. I really noticed how he treated Eytan. Maybe that's why Eytan likes to stay quiet and not express his views very often- because he's used to every time he opens his mouth his father arguing with him. Eytan did open his mouth to tell his father that I have this journal on the Internet. His father insisted that I give him the URL and promised he wouldn't read it all, only glance a little. He used to like me... I hope he doesn't glance at anything too terrible. He probably won't even understand most of it.

I hurt my good knee today. Actually, I hurt it last night when I was running down the street to keep warm. Last night was SO WINDY! After the auction (which was a HUGE success), I met Eytan at City Cafe and the we went to his friend, Frank's, to watch Queer as Folk (what a crappy soap opera that will attract every gay man alive). So, I was running and hurt my knee a little. Then this morning I went to pull something off of the bottom shelf of the fridge and heard the ligaments tear as I bent down. It was scary and painful. Now it REALLY hurts! I'm hoping it'll get better on its own (and with some excercises). I also hope it sounded worse than it actually is.

Now I'm back at George's. Just learned (on The Weather Channel) that there was a huge tornado in Tuscaloose, AL- the biggest since 1953. Now I'm watching a program on engineering disasters on The History Channel. When Russia launched Sputnik, a U.S. Senator called for a National week of shame.

I'm not ready for the wintery mix tomorrow. I hope it doesn't make driving too terrible.

Why does George walk around the kitchen wearing only a towel? Why am I writing this while he's sitting here watching TV with me?

So tomorrow I leave the comfort of George's basement and go to the cramped non-private apartment of Matt & Sylvia's. Oh boy. I would just stay here, but Sylvia is so looking forward to my visit, it's only for 3 nights, and 2 of the nights I'll be getting back late. It will at least give me a chance to work on my patience.

I'm upset that I havgen't been remembering my dreams recently. They've got to be interesting.

Yum! George has yummy port!

Top 3 reasons the Ravens probably won't make it far in the playoffs:
1. No offense
2. Cockey from their winning season, they'll make serious mistakes
3. They're not as great as people think. Sure they have a great defense, but they also has an easy schedule.

I was planning on going to bed, but I'm not even a tiny bit tired. Sick of TV, maybe I'll try another book. They have so many interesting books. Last night I read "The Games People Play" which wasn't as interesting as I thought it would be. Most of it was either obvious or stupid. Tonight I'll think I'll try "The Doors of Perception". It is short, but I don't want to get caught up in it and not go to bed at all. This is where magazines or short stories would be nice.

Irritating day! People were annoying me at the ofice- so much that I had to leave early. I do not appreciate being told what to do nor do I appreciate being yelled at, especially by people who aren't involved in the issue to begin with. I just have to stop thinking about it. Every time I remember, I get pissed all over again! Now Sylvia's driving me nuts. I really need tomorrow to be relaxing.

I'm planning on going down to Ellicott City tomorrow to enjoy the mellow people, unique shops, pub, and coffee house. Then I'll go back to Towson and wrap Christmas presents once everyone is gone.

Thursday I'm going out with Jeff, Jon (probably Michelle too), Eytan and maybe Brian. Friday is the offices Christmas party. Then I'll go check into the hotel and later that evening, do something with Daniel. Saturday I return the car and then have fun getting from Rockville to College Park in time for Neil & Maxine's dinner. Oh geez, I just realised that I'm going to have to do this lugging around everyone's Christmas presents. That will make it extra fun.

I wanted to get online, but cheapo Sylvia's free ISP doesn't have any working numbers. More irritation.

I wish I was tired and could fall asleep.

Well, today was cold. Too cold to walk around Ellicott City. So I only went to the coffee shop and then left. Then I drove around for a while. It was nice driving on back roads again! Then I went to see "Bounce". Who wrote this crap? It could have been a good movie. The plot was there, it just didn't have a natural progression. Plus, I didn't like the characters. Then I went back to Towson and wrapped Christmas presents. Oh, I figured out that Paula and Harvey can take the presents to Neil & Maxine's so I don't have to carry them around the Metro stations.

I'm pissed! I opened the box that I shipped here which arrived today, and found that I did not pack my winter shoes like I thought. Now I have to wear sandals in the snow. My toes were freezing today. I also need to go buy some socks since I forgot to pack those too. I really thought I was more careful when packing. Guess not.

After I go get socks, I get to go to Sylvia's for some more irritation. I can't wait to leave!!! Oh how I wish I was able to go back to George's. But that would upset her so I really shouldn't. I guess I could say I had things to do and go in my room. Maybe I'll go pick up a book or magazine when I get the socks.

I've been REALLY busy the past few days. I had to check my website to see where I left off. The details from the past few days are going to be pretty vague since I'm tired and don't remember everything exactly.

Thursday night I had dinner at Sylvia's and then met Jeff at his Mom's house where I got to see Stanley! I haven't seen him in a while and was good to see him again. Then we picked up Jon & Michelle and went to One World where we met Eytan and Brian. It was so fun hanging out with all of them again (and Michelle didn't bother me too much). It felt just like old times. Matt Bennett was there as usual and joined us for a little while. I still can't stand him and he's not as cute as he used to be. After we left, we went to Hamden to try to look at the Christmas lights but couldn't find them. Of course there was a picture of it in the paper the next day (it was on 34th St. of course and we were looking on 36th and 40th). Oh well. Then I hung out at Jeff's for a little longer and then went back to Sylvia's.

I was SO GLAD to leave that apartment Friday morning. I was going to go out early and get them flowers but she was annoying me so much, I went out and just drove around for a few minutes and came right back without the flowers. She followed me around the apartment everywhere. At one point she followed me to the bathroom and kept talking. I wanted to say, "If you don't leave, I'm going to close the door on your face." But I was polite and listened. It was sort of nice to know (but not really) that George was going through the same thing at his house with his mother. So if I had stayed at George's, I would have had the same issues (except not quite as bad maybe?).

Friday wasn't so hot. Too many people are dying in car accidents and it made me scared to go down to Virginia where I had my bad accident. At least I didn't have to drive. So I wasn't in the partying mood for the office Christmas party but I stayed anyway. Then I went to Eytan's to hang out for a little while so I didn't have to drive to Gaithersburg in rush hour.

I got to Gaithersburg around 8:00 (and did have to deal with some crazy drivers on 495), checked into the hotel, and then went to Daniel's. Seeing him again was wonderful- just like old times. We had dinner at the Mongolian Grill and then watched "The Matrix" on his DVD player on his laptop (a little irritating since it was hard to see but still cool).

Saturday I returned the rental car and then had a drink at the Cheesecake Factory. The same bartender as last time was there. I only remember that because he asked to see my ID and noticed that I was from Arizona where he went to college. So he's now told me that twice. Of course he didn't remember me. Then I took the Metro to College Park which took a lot less time than I expected. Neil & Maxine's dinner was nice, and Sherry didn't get on my nerves too much until the car ride to the hotel when she talked non-stop about how she never took a day off from work in her life until now and how Chris made the Dean's list at his college and how she can't wait to retire... I guess I should just be happy that they took their precious time to give me a ride. They really were in a rush to leave since Jay had to make a cake that night or something.

Harvey got me a Palm Pilot VII!!!!! I'm so excited and am having a blast with it. For all you reading this, you can write to me at [email protected]. I also got a nice sweater and some ornaments from Neil & Maxine and a gift certificate to Pier One from Jay & Sherry. Oh, and at the office, I got a book of taxi driver quotations from Eytan, a gift certificate to Barnes & Noble from Bev & Lisa, a bottle of one of my favourite wines (Santa Margherita Pinot Grigiot) from Mike, and a 365 day calendar with cool facts from Paula which I will put on this site as "Interesting fact of the day" starting January 1st. I've never gotten so many presents before and I actually like all of them!

Saturday night Josh & Chandra came to Gaithersburg and we watched "Hollow Man" in the hotel. The effects were cool but the movie they built around it sucked. The script was terrible and we thought it would never end. It was like they said, "Hmm, it's not long enough, let's bring Kevin Bacon back and have him die again in a different way." They did that a few times.

Sunday we drove down to Christiansburg. At night I tried to go to church but didn't make it. I was too upset and lonely to face going alone. So I just drove around listening to Christmas music. Perhaps it was because I was driving around at night, but the town seemed foreign to me. I actually got a little lost. Well, not really lost, but did turn the wrong way twice. Then I came back to Josh's and we watched Denis Leary's "No Cure for Cancer" and opened presents. They got me some cool dragon candlesticks and silver candles which will look great in my new bedroom.

Today I went to Josh's mother's for Christmas lunch and then to his dad's for a little bit.

And now I'm caught up on my oh-so-exciting life. This week actually has been great for social things.

Tomorrow I plan to do some little irritating things like call Time Warner to set up cable and call Verizon to see if we can get a phone number yet. I might also rent a car.

And I guess that's it. I felt like I had much more to say but I guess I've forgotten it all. That's what happens when you don't write for a few days.

And I did decide to rent a car since I hate having to depend on other people. Enterprise is the only place that had anything (Budget didn't have anything available and that was the only other place in the area) but they're cheap so that's fine.

And also, I called the other day to schedule the placement tests for Hunter and the woman told me that because I have so many credits and my SAT scores were high (my SAT's were horrible, like an 840 or something), I didn't have to take all the tests. I do have to take math though so I figured I'd get it over with now and take it on January 10th. Now I'll be available on the 18th for lot viewing since I don't have to spend all day taking tests! Yea!!

Nathan is an interesting guy. He's from Grundy, VA so I figured he would have the intelligence of a typical rural redneck. Not so. We had a great conversation about business, politics, and technology. He also informed me that his grandfather is a die-hard Democrat. And I thought that all people from rural places were automatically Republican (mainly because of the gun control issue). Guess I thought wrong. Nathan did get a gun for Christmas though.

Now I'm trying to get tired enough to fall asleep eventually. I really don't want to sleep too late tomorrow morning. This morning I had trouble getting up, and I wouldn't have woken up if Chandra hadn't come in and told me what time it was. This basement apartment has no windows and no clock handy.

Rented the car from Enterprise and now am sitting at the Easy Chair having some tea. All the old emotions are back now for some reason. I can't look at anything around here without feeling melancholy/nostalgic/depressed/lonely. I want to do everything at once and don't know where to start. I should be doing things I need to do but all those things can wait till tomorrow. Maybe I'll go get a book and go from place to place reading it. The problem is that I want the impossible- to go from place to place with Eytan and Terry. I really miss those times. I also want to start making some graphics which I can do at Josh's, but I don't want anyone around when I'm doing that. It's hard to be creative and productive with 3 people around talking and getting in the way. Well, Chandra has to work at 5:00 so I think I'll go back then. Josh and Nathan are quiet people who keep to themselves (hopefully). I just hope I'll be able to get things done at that time. I'm used to working when inspiration strikes.

I had strange dreams last night which I vaguely remembered when I woke up this morning but now only remember something about singing and something about George.

I think what I should do is go see a movie and get out of my own life for a couple of hours. And I can check movie times and listings on my Palm Pilot!

I think I'll go with the nice mindless "Miss Congeniality". I'm sure it'll be terrible, but I LOVE Sandra Bullock! Plus it starts at a good time.

If I had thought of this earlier, I could have had some lunch first. I'm kind of hungry. Actually, if I hurry, I could grab some mac & cheese at Macado's quickly.

I decided to brave Mill Mountain this morning. After a brief wave of sadness, I got over it and am now enjoying some Harmony Garden tea (since they were out of Snow Monkey Plum- I love that name). This morning Mill Mountain filled with locals since all the students are gone. I really, really, really do miss this friendly, quiet town. Oh, but there's traffic here now. 460 is backed up most of the day since they added a huge bank, Post Office, and other thinsg in a few different strip malls. I'm dying to come back here when they finish the Smart Road- that'll be fun! I think it's so cool that the first Smart Road will be here in the New River Valley. I remember when I was a kid, I thought the New Jersey urnpike should have been on a conveyor belt. Well, they're finally using my idea ;-)

"Miss Congeniality" was so much better than I thought it would be. Or perhaps it was just the perfect movie for my mood. Whatever- it did the job! And Sandra Bullock is so gorgeous- although I think she looks better when she's not all made up.

After WAT TOO MUCH effort, I got a phone number for New York- local through AT&T and long distance through Sprint (only because of a special deal and I should switch to AT&T in a month or two so I can get Hilton points). I also started Time Warner cable (they're supposed to call me back but if they don't call in a few days, I'll call them). I was going to set up Earthlink DSL as well but the phone line isn't going to be activated until January 22 so I have to wait on the DSL.

This morning I finally mailed back my Phoenix apartment keys. I finally feel back on top of things and should feel that way until it's time to unpack.

There isn't a credit union I can join in New York so I guess I'll go with Citibank (only because Paula as their stock).

I was planning on seeing Andy while I was here, but now I'm not so sure. I think he knows how to find me and I think he knows I'm here, so I'll leave it up to him.

I hope I can get everything to fit in my apartment. I'm going to miss my guitar, but a fulte is about all I have room for. There are still some things I need to get too- trash can, wall pictures, phone, soap dish, a CD rack...

Why does my Palm Pilot have coverage in Josh's basement apartment but not anywhere else down here?

Last night Josh, Chandra and I went to El Guadelupe- yum! I can't believe I lived in Phoenix and my two favourite Mexican restaurants are in Blacksburg (El Guadelupe and El Rodeo). The food is especially good with the Jim Beam hot sauce we brought with us. I'll have to buy some when I get to New York- it's awesome!

Today I drove around Ellet a little bit and now am at Bogens. I love these country roads! In fact, 603 & 723 are my favourite roads in the country! I'll definitely have to drive some more before I leave. Wow, after I leave here, I won't be driving again at all for a while. Glad it hasn't snowed yet. I have a bad feeling we'll get a blizzard on the 1st so I won't be able to make it back to New York. Furniture assembly people are coming at 8:00 AM on the 4th and I really hope I won't have to cancel. Who knows when I'd be able to reschedule?

I must have hit the switch on the travel alarm clock in my suitcase while shuffling through some things. It went off at 6:00 this morning and I was NOT a happy camper. But at least I got a lot done today.

Okay, time to go driving.

There are too many cars on the back roads now as well. And they all go about 15 mph. GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!

For the second night in a row I didn't really sleep much. I keep waking up 10-20 times. But I remember a little bit of my dreams from last night. I was in a dance show (and sucked) with Michi, Meital, Tracey, Jen, Alix, and Rebeka. I couldn't dance onstage and was a stumbling mess backstage.

Andy came over to Josh's last night. I guess I finally have something in my head that I can't get myself to type for the whole world to see. I've been wondering how I would handle something like this. Personally, I have no problem sharing anything, but when it involves someone else, it's really not fair to them. Anyway, I really want to devote all my energy right now to studying pshychology just to understand the way the brain works- why people act certain ways, why people click with some people, how do all those chemicals work? It's amazing how you can not see someone for a few years and go right back to where you left off. Of course, I saw him this summer and it was that kind of experience, and it was again last night. And now I'm contemplating seeing him today? It sounded like a good idea last night, but now that the morning is here, it all looks different. What's that line from "The Fantasticks"? Something like, "What looked wonderful in moonlight may look different by the day." I'll make my decision when I hear from him later.

What I will do today is call Joe and probably go over there later. If that changes the "plans" with Andy, so be it. I really want to see Joe and family while I'm here and today is the perfect day to do that. I'm dying to see Kyla's baby (who is probably not a baby anymore, I'm not sure how much time has passed since Joe told me the news).

Okay, I'll go call him now.

Then I decided to go see Andy this evening. We hung out and went to Pizza Inn for a little while which was a good time (I'd never been there). I'm VERY hyper and semi out of it. Almost feel like I'm getting sick. I was so out of it, I forgot to turn on the heat in the car until I was almost back to Josh's.

Now I'm having an interesting conversation with Nathan. He really is a great person. Plus it's nice just to have someone to talk to right now. I don't know how well I'd do by myself right now. Although I have a feeling I'd do just fine.

Looking forward to football games this weekend.

I'm really having weird sleeping situations. I fall asleep very fast (a first, I think) and then I wake up many times throughout the night and finally wake up for good very early. I have been out of bed (or technically, off the couch) before 6:30 for the last 3 mornings.

About last night... I don't feel strange or uncomfortable or really anything. I have some thoughts though that I thought I'd try to just start typing about and see if I can make any sense.

When I used to live here, I always thought there was some sort of connection between me and Andy. There were so many instances where things were just beyond coincidence. I don't think I feel completely that way anymore. I honestly don't feel anything. I really thought I would. I don't know if those situations are there and I'm just not noticing them, or things are different, or I just don't care, or it would be different if I still lived here.

About relationships in general... I've never really been in a real one with someone I really cared about more than a friend. In fact, I can't tell the difference between friends and whatever is supposed to be considered "more than friends". There are people I like more than others, but that's about it. I'm hoping that I just haven't met the right person. Every time I do get in a relationship, I get tired of the person after a few months. I'm hoping that too is because I just haven't met the right person. In all the relationships I have been in, I didn't like the people to begin with. That's what gives me hope that those were just the wrong people and when I meet someone I really click with, things will be different.

There are so many other questions- why do I get tired of people in general (not just people I'm in a relationship with)? What kind of person would I like to be in a relationship with? Where are those people? Actually, I think I need to figure out some more things about myself before I can even try a relationship. I feel like I'm too scattered- sort of like a jack-of-all-trades except not just with talents, but with all aspects of my personality. I don't have anything I'm passionate about. There are plenty of things that I like and am interested in, but nothing that stands out more than something else. I sometimes don't know if I'm acting a certain way because that's how I feel or that's how I'd like to act. Maybe I should pay more attention to what I'm doing when I'm feeling good. I don't really understand that last sentence.

Another problem is that I often feel better when I'm in a group of people all getting along and having fun than I do when I'm alone with one "special" person (or person that's supposed to be special). I remember a number of times when I'm out in a group with the person I'm dating, not wanting to leave the group and go home with that one person.

In the past few years, I haven't really been interested in anyone. Sometimes I feel like that's odd, but most of the time I don't even think about it. What does bother me though, is that the few people I've met that I'd like to get to know better are married. I don't know if I really find them interesting or the fact that they're not available makes them more interesting.

Ideally, I'd like to get married and have a family. I want that more and more recently. But I don't know if I really want that or I just like the idea of it or if I just want it because that's the traditional thing to do. Most of the time I like being alone. And during those instances of loneliness, I don't always wish I was in a relationship- most of the time a close friend would be wonderful.

In fact, I'm happiest when I have a few close friends that I can call at any time and they're always there. I've actually only had that once and that was the summer of '94 with Jon, Jeff, Brian, Andi, and Kim. Just knowing they were always there was enough to make me feel like my life was as close to perfect as it can get. Actually, the first few months I lived in Blacksburg with Eytan and Terry was wonderful too. And now that I think about it some more, living with Daniel and Brian was great as well. Knowing that I was coming home to people that I clicked with was pretty special. If I always had people like that in my life, I wonder if I ever would want to be in a relationship.

I hate having questions unanswered. I hate not understanding myself. The good thing is that I seldom think about these things. Most of the time my life is so busy, I don't have time to think about these things. I guess I have too much time to think down here.

One thought of yesterday- Evalin reminds me of George's wife, Linda.

Also went to Mill Mountain this morning and they just got in some Snow Monkey Plum. That stuff is really good until it brews too long, then it's WAY too strong. I felt fine with being there this today. Guess I'm getting used to things. Or maybe last night really did get me out of my lonely, melancholy mood.

Football starts in an hour so I'll probably head up to Champs soon. I can't believe the Miami game will be blacked out since 13,000 seats are still available. I think this is the first time in 7 years (Lions game didn't sell out that year) that a playoff game didn't sell out. I hope there are people at Champs. Not too many people though- I want a seat. I'm not very good at watching football games at bars by myself but right now it sounds better than watching it here by myself. Maybe there will be someone else there by themselves that I can talk to.

Yesterday was a lazy day. I have this sort of cold thing again- why does it keep coming back? Is it the weather or the confusion of my life?

Instead of watching football, I went to Happy's Flea Market in Roanoke with Josh, Chandra, and Nathan. I did watch a little bit of the Miami/Indianapolis game there as well as play pinball and look at some crappy knives and swords. Then we went to El Rodeo in Roanoke for dinner. Love that place!

Came back here and watched the sad end of the Rams/Saints game. I think Hakim is Arabic for stupid-idiot-who-loses-the-game. Then I sort of watched the Pitsburgh/Ottawa hockey game until I fell asleep around 10:00. Those sportscasters REALLY love saying the name Mario Lemieux. I counted 46 before I lost count. He did have a pretty incredible game though.

So I woke up around 2:30 and after I accepted the fact that I wasn't going to fall back to sleep any time soon, I got up.

I have no idea what I'll do all day. Maybe I'll rest some more and watch some football so I can maybe be healthy enough and have enough energy to do something tonight. What a pathetic New Years it will be otherwise.

Chandra reminds me a little bit of myself when I was younger. Mostly in the way she tries to "shock" mainstream-type people. Actually, I still do that a little bit with the people I REALLY don't like.

Instead of a New Years resolution, I'm going to make monthly resolutions. I started to do that this summer but it didn't work too well. January will be to stick to a work-out routine and to have more patience. Or maybe I should just pick one and do the next one in February. Yes, I'll work on patience by making patience February's resolution. If I don't accomplish the monthly resolution, I'll continue it into the next month until it becomes habit. If this works, by the end of 2001 I should be more of the person I want to be. It sounds great now, but easier said than done, I'm afraid.

I'm feeling much better than yesterday (physically, mentally, and emotionally). I am hungry though so I'm hoping something will be open in a little bit. I'll wait till my hair dries a little more before going out. It's damn cold out there. Why did I move back to winter-land again?

I brought more pants with me than shirts (I'm assuming I have some more shirts waiting for me in New York but maybe not- can't remember). That's backwards, I usually have trouble finding pants. And the shirts that I do have with me, most of them aren't warm enough to wear right now. Maybe I'll have time to do a little shopping in January for warmer clothes.

I really want to go have some tea and a bagel, but I'm just not ready to brave the cold. Almost there, but not quite.

What can I do until then? I'm running out of ideas. OH! I can update my list of movies for 2000. That's a nice way to end the year. That will take a while though. Maybe I'll do some now and the rest when I get back from The Easy Chair.

Came back here, and later went to Champs with Nathan to watch the 1st half of the Ravens/Broncos game. Then came back here and got sleepy and dozed off for an hour or so. Big Mistake!!!

I had a crazy, detailed dream which started with lot viewing in George's house. The next day viewing was to take place in my New York apartment. The viewing at George's was going on in the basement and there was a party going on all over the house as well. Frank Mandel was in the kitchen trying to deal with the party sub. He went out to get a plastic knife but none of the businesses would give him one without purchasing anything. He was pissed off and yelling about that.

Kim, Dana, and Lisa McNick (I know I spelled that wrong) were at the party- they were being typical, clueless partiers. I think a dead relative from my mother's side was there as well.

Jay, Neil, and Maxine were there as well. Jay gave me and Josh cool Tull t-shirts- should have known it was a dream then- the shirts were from '86 with blue, shiney designs.

Someone told me that Eytan was in the basement crying. He had found a post-it in the trash can that I wrote the day before and it sounded like I was complaining about Eytan, but really he just took it out of context and I didn't mean it like that at all. I cleared that up really fast.

I was upset about the "hotel" situation my apartment was turning into and Eytan, Paula, and I were taking care of that while Harvey was making me lot view, look up stuff for Dana Okey, and help Frank with the sub situation.

George gave me 30 seconds of peace which was lovely but not enough.

Then someone came up to me and said, "Your friend Josh is an odd guy." "Yes," I said, "Everyone tells me that."

Then I got another stolen moment with George where I found out that he could dance. He was doing these jumpy, twirly things. So we had a little waltz in the bathroom (the only place not packed with people). It was beautiful- then I woke up. I tried to fall back to sleep but it didn't work.

Now I'm a non-functioning human probably for the rest of the night. If it wasn't New Years Eve (and the beginning of a new millenium), I'd probably just rent some movies and crash here. But it is New Years (and the beginning of a new millemium) so I'll probably join Josh at a party. I think I'll drive separately just in case I don't want to be there.

Journal
Home Page